Blackbird
by 2hottwilightchicas
Summary: BxE, full summary inside.
1. Full Summary

**Full summary**: Bella and Edward are in love and human. Until Edward finds out he's dying. Enter: the Cullens. Vampires. They all take a liking to the doomed Edward, and decide he's worth saving. They have to leave with Edward once he's changed, which breaks Bella's heart when she needs help the most. Under certain circumstances, Bella's turned as well. Both Edward and Bella think the other is dead, and decades pass until they are reunited. But it's not a happy reunion. Edward is elated beyond belief, but Bella doesn't remember a thing of her human life, not even Edward. Not only that, but she already has a mate.

**Part 1 song:**

Leave Out All the Rest by Linkin Park

I dreamed I was missing

You were so scared

But no one would listen

Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming

I woke with this fear

What am I leaving

When I'm done here

So if you're asking me

I want you to know

When my time comes

Forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some

Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me

And when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest

Leave out all the rest

Don't be afraid

I've taken my beating

I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface

Not all the way through

I've never been perfect

But neither have you

So if you're asking me

I want you to know

When my time comes

Forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some

Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me

And when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest

Leave out all the rest

Forgetting

All the hurt inside

You've learned to hide so well

Pretending

Someone else can come and save me from myself

I can't be who you are

When my time comes

Forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some

Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me

And when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest

Leave out all the rest

Forgetting

All the hurt inside

You've learned to hide so well

Pretending

Someone else can come and save me from myself

I can't be who you are

I can't be who you are


	2. A Month

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Ok, I make notoriously long authors notes. Just warning you. But usually it's because I have something to say that I think you need to hear. So…**

**I LOVE music. I always listen to music when I'm reading, writing, doing homework, surfing the internet (I'm sure there's a cooler way to say that but you know what I mean), etc. As you've probably already noticed, there is a song for Part 1 (the title is a song too). If you really pay attention to the lyrics, you'll probably figure out what happens in Part 1. Well, **_**I**_** think so at least…**

**Anyway, I thought maybe I could put a song before every chapter! So people like me would have something to listen to that fit the mood of the chapter so you could really get into it (because that's what I do). So I tried **_**really**_** hard to fit one song per chapter. It had to fit with lyrics and the general tone of the music. Well. That didn't always work out perfectly… so not all the chapter's songs are perfect. Forgive me? Yes? No? Maybe? Well, we'll see I suppose.**

**~Emmett, 1/2 of 2hottwilightchicas**

**Part 1: Leukemia **

Chapter 1 – A month

Song: Breathe by Superchick (this song actually fits the chapter really well. I was proud of myself :D )

Please tell me you'll fight this fight

I can't see without your light

I need you to breathe into my life

Don't tell me this is goodbye

I won't grieve - it's not yet time

Each breath breathed is keeping hope alive

So keep breathing

Go on breathe in

Keep on breathing

Go on breathe in

Just breathe

Each breath breathed means we're alive

And life means that we can find

The reasons to keep on getting by

And if reasons we can't find

We'll make up some to get by

'Til breath by breath we'll leave this behind

All you have to do is breathe

Bella's POV

"What do you want to do today?" I asked, lying in bed next to Edward. I turned and looked into his deep, green eyes. He leaned closer and kissed my nose.

"This." He said and turned onto his side to face me. I turned on my side to face him too. He reached up, tucked my hair behind my ear, and stroked my cheek with his thumb.

"Me too." I whispered. We laid there until we heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." Edward called, not breaking eye contact with me.

I heard the door open and footsteps on the linoleum ground.

"Sorry you two. We need more blood samples." The nurse mumbled. I looked up at her.

"Good morning, Libby. It's ok." I said. I got up off Edward's bed, getting my wrist tangled into the wires and tubes connected to his arm. "Uh-oh." I sighed. This happens almost everyday.

Edward laughed, and reached his free arm up to help me. After I was free, I went back to sit in my chair next to Edward's bed.

Libby walked forward and took out a needle. I turned away, not able to watch. Blood was not my thing.

Libby started to talk but Edward interrupted her.

"No, Libby. You say it everyday. We know you are sorry for interrupting our 'time together', but it's fine. Really. You don't have to say it."

Nurse Libby smiled a sad smile and nodded, a tear in her eye. She took the blood sample and left.

I resumed my place next to Edward in his hospital bed. The first time Libby came in and found me there she wasn't so understanding. But after she found us like this every morning, she stopped criticizing. Now she hated walking in on us. She was always almost crying by the time she left the room again, every time for the past month.

We talked all morning. About nothing and everything and anything. Everything he said was important, to be stored in my head so I could go back to it at anytime and remember his voice, his words, his face. I wouldn't dare think about when I'd need those memories the most, though.

Another knock at the door interrupted our conversation about the best T.V. show.

"Come in." We said together. I giggled and kissed him.

Dr. Cullen entered, a chart in his hand. I stared at that chart. That chart would tell me exactly the last thing in the world I wanted to hear. I finally looked up at the doctor's face, reading his expression. It seemed to confirm my worst fear.

Edward nodded at the doctor. "Give it to me, Doc."

"Well, your white blood cell count –"

"I don't care about the results. The technical stuff. I just want what the results mean." Edward said.

Dr. Cullen sighed, looked at the chart, and looked back up.

"A month. Tops."

**A/N: Sorry it's so short; the next one is MUCH longer. Also, tell me what you think. Just so you know, the first 12 chapters are angst and sadness because it's Edward dying. So, it will be awhile until there isn't suffering. Well, there will be suffering after that but it won't be because Edwards dying…yeah…just a warning in case that isn't your thing.**

**~Emmett**


	3. Flashbacks

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: This song could have worked for the last chapter pretty good and the next chapter too (I think…if I remember right), but I couldn't put one song for all three chapters so it's going to be for this one.**

**The parts in italics are flashbacks.**

**~Emmett**

Chapter 2 – Day 1: Flashbacks

Song: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol

We'll do it all, everything, on our own.

We don't need anything, or anyone.

If I lay here, if I just lay here

Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.

I don't quite know how to say how I feel

Those three words, are said too much, they're not enough.

If I lay here, if I just lay here

Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.

Forget what we're told, before we get too old

Show me a garden that's bursting into life.

Let's waste time, chasing cars, around our heads.

I need your grace to remind me, to find my own.

If I lay here, if I just lay here

Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.

Forget what we're told, before we get too old

Show me a garden that's bursting into life.

All that I am, all that I ever was

Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where, confused about how as well

just know that these things will never change for us at all.

If I lay here, if I just lay here

Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.

Bella's POV

My breath hitched. I felt the tears spring forward and roll down my cheeks. I was shaking. Edward pulled me close, tucking my head to his chest. He rubbed soothing circles on my back and hummed to me.

I couldn't believe myself. The love of my life lay next to me dying, and he was comforting _me_!

Dying.

Edward was dying.

Why? Why him?

I heard Dr. Cullen mumble an apology and slip out the door.

I cried for hours. Edward didn't say anything, he just held me and hummed me my lullaby.

I remembered the day he first played it for me.

_He took my hand and practically drug me into the piano store. Edward came here almost daily and played on a concert piano in the back of the store. The store-workers loved his playing. He didn't have a piano of his own to play on so he came here.  
_

_I remember he sat down at the bench, grinning so much I couldn't believe his cheeks didn't hurt. He pulled me down with him so I was sitting next to him._

_At this point we had only been dating officially for a week, but I already knew I loved him. He was the one, and the only._

_He leaned in, grazing his lips on my ear._

_"For you, love." He whispered, and kissed my neck._

_He turned back to the piano and rested his hands on the keys. He bent his head, closed his eyes, and concentrated for a second. He relaxed, but kept his eyes closed. Suddenly his hands were all over the keys, the most beautiful music coming from the depths of the instrument. _**(A/N: All my fellow twi-hards, get out your soundtracks and listen to Bella's Lullaby.) **_It was beautiful, intricate delicate, peaceful, and sweet, all at the same time._

_By the time it was over, I had tears streaming down my face. Edward turned to me, smiling, until he saw the tears. He placed his hands on either side of my face and wiped away the tears._

_"What's wrong?" He asked, concerned._

_"Nothing! That was the most beautiful thing I've ever heard!" He smiled and kissed my forehead._

_"I wrote that for you, love. You're my inspiration. Everything in that lullaby is what you are like to me. Everything I love about you."_

_I was shocked and elated. He really wrote something so beautiful, inspired by _me_?_

_I grabbed his face and attacked his lips with mine. He was shocked at first but it didn't take long for him to get into the kiss as much as I was.  
_

"Bella, love, it's ok. I don't feel _that_ sick…" Edwards voice broke me out of my memories. This was no time to get stuck in the past. I had to be making new memories right now. Good ones. Great ones. Fantastic ones. Memories I will never forget.

"I'm sorry." I hiccupped. "So sorry." I tried to sit up but Edward's arms stayed firmly around me.

"No need to feel sorry, love. If you didn't cry, I'd start to get a little worried, actually." He said sheepishly.

I smiled and kissed him, long and deep. I felt his smile as he pulled slightly back to talk.

"It's not weirding you out that you're kissing a dying man?" He questioned. Just to prove to him it doesn't weird me out in the least, I kissed him again. This kiss was full of passion. He started to pull back again, but I wasn't having _any _of_ that_. I swung my left leg over his side and hoisted myself up a little so I was straddling him, sitting on his lower stomach, never breaking lip contact with him. I placed my arms behind his head, acting as his pillow. He placed his hands on my hips.

"Hey Edward – WHOA!" Emmett came bursting into the room, only to take a step back when he found me straddling Edward.

I sighed against Edwards lips and sat up. I didn't get off Edward and his hands didn't leave my hips. I twisted around toward the door to face Emmett.

"Oh, come in I guess." I sighed again.

"I don't know if I _want_ to anymore…" Emmett hesitated.

"Oh yes you do. You want to watch." Edward mumbled.

Emmett's booming laughter filled the room as he strolled in and plopped down in my usual chair, stretching his legs out and placing his hands behind his head.

"Yeah, but you'd never let me." Emmett sighed.

Edward laughed. "You got _that_ right, perv."

Emmett laughed again.

Even though Emmett always seemed to appear at the most inopportune moments, I loved him being here. Besides me, Emmett was Edward's only friend. As a sick orphan, people avoided Edward like the plague. But that seemed to be what drew Emmett towards Edward. Emmett didn't have any friends either, besides his family.

Emmett was a year older than Edward and me, him being 18. He's Dr. Cullen's only adopted son. A blond – Rosalie, I think her name was – was also adopted by Dr. Cullen and his wife, who couldn't have children or something. People avoided Emmett and Rosalie just as much as people avoided Edward, and by association, me. Emmett was probably avoided because he was so intimidating. He looked as big as a body-builder, but once you got to know him, he was just a big teddy bear.

I never saw Rosalie, she never came to the hospital. Dr. Cullen's wife either. Dr. Cullen has been taking care of Edward since he was first diagnosed with leukemia a year ago. Emmett was at the hospital once, looking for his adopted dad, when he came bursting into our room.

_"Excuse me! Who the hell are you?!" I asked angrily. Edward had just been diagnosed and I didn't want to share him with anyone at the moment._

_"Whoa, hey, sorry. I'm looking for a Doctor Carlisle Cullen." He had said._

_"He just left." I growled. Then I heard his booming laughter._

_"Calm down there, little lady. What's got your panties in a twist?" I glared at him and turned my gaze to Edward. He was asleep. He was on so many medications, not even my screams or Emmett's laughter had woken him up. He looked so bad. Pale, a cold sweat shone on his forehead. He looked weak, like he might go any second. It was the worst feeling in the world to sit and watch while he deteriorated and I knew I couldn't do anything about it._

_Emmett crept closer, placing his hand under my chin and turned my head so I had to look at him._

_"He'll be fine." He said softly._

_I tried to get myself out of his grip but he wouldn't let go._

_"Hey." I looked at him. "Really." He nodded._

_I didn't believe him. All you had to do was look at Edward to realize he wasn't okay._

_I shook my head as much as I could with his hand holding my chin._

_"Yes, he will. He'll pull through. I know it looks really bad right not but I've seen people get out…alive…from worse." He whispered. I closed me eyes and let the tears fall._

_"And what if he doesn't? What if he doesn't pull through and what if he dies? What if I lose him forever? What if I never get to see his smiling face again? What if he never holds me again? What if he isn't strong enough?" I cried._

_"Those are a lot of 'what if's'…" Emmett shook his head._

_"They're all probable."_

_"No, they're all _possible_. But anything's possible. Believe me. Miracles happen everyday." There was a pause as I considered this._

_"What the fu—"_

_"EDWARD!" I cried, and ripped myself from Emmett's grip and flung myself next to Edward, kissing him over and over. He pulled back and put his hands up. _

_"Who the hell is _that_?" He cried pointing to Emmett._

_Emmett's thunderous laughter filled the room and broke away the awkwardness._

_"Don't worry, man. She'll stick to you like glue." He said._

_Edward turned to me, still not having gotten his answer._

_"Who's that, Bella?" He asked._

_"That's…that's…his name is…" I struggled. Had he told me his name?_

_"Emmett." He said. "Dr. Cullen's son. I came here looking for him when your little girlfriend here attacked me for being in here. I think she just wanted you all to herself." He said with a wink._

_"That doesn't explain why he was so close to your face…" Edward directed the statement to me._

_"Hmmm, yeah, I bet that looked bad." I mused._

_Edward raised his eyebrows and pulled back a little more._

_I turned to Emmett. "Explain that one, Mr. Emmett Cullen." I said. He laughed again._

_"Easy. You wouldn't look at me. That's pretty rude when you're having a conversation, you know. She only had eyes for you, dude." Emmett directed the last part to Edward._

_"Nice." I said, turning to Edward, who grinned at me. I bent down and kissed him._

_"Well, that's better than everything else I was considering…" Edward murmured._

_Emmett laughed again._

_"I'm guessing one of those ideas you were considering was that me and your Miss Bella had hot hospital sex at the end of you bed?"_

_"Well…um…maybe…"_

_Emmett's laughter seemed to shake the room._

_"Sorry to disappoint, man. I got myself a hot babe already. I knew you would want to watch me bang you girl, though." Emmett patted Edward's shoulder._

_"Yeah, not really…"_

_"EW!" I scrunched my nose. "Not with you!"_

_Emmett laughed. "You only wish, hun."_

_"Not in the slightest!"  
_

_Emmett visited Edward everyday after that.  
_

"So how 'bout it, Bella?" Emmett asked.

"Huh?" What'd I miss?

Emmett chuckled. "I'm not interesting enough for you now?"

"No I – wait. How about what?" I asked.

"It's my birthday in three weeks! As my only friends, you two better show!"

"Three weeks from now?" I asked, my breath gone. In three weeks, Edward will need to be hospitalized. He'll be close to death at that point. I looked down at Edward (I was still sitting on him) who seemed to be reading my mind.

"I don't know, Emmett. I might be dead by then." Edward said calmly. Just those words made the tears come up again. I collapsed on top of him, sobbing into his chest. He wrapped his arms around my waist. Emmett was unusually quiet. "I'll be bed-ridden by then. Sorry, man." Edward said.

"We have beds at my house." Emmett said.

"I'll be hooked up to medical junk."

"We have medical junk at my house." Emmett said.

"Couldn't we just celebrate your birthday early?" Edward asked.

"Edward. I'm rich. My family's rich. We have medical stuff and machines, and the stuff we don't have we can get. My dad's a doctor. My dad's _your_ doctor." Emmett said.

"I don't know if it's worth it for just day." Edward sighed. I was still crying.

"I don't mean just a day." Emmett said.

Edward looked up at him sharply.

"What do you mean then?"

"When it comes to that, you'd be better taken care of if you were at my house. Carlisle could take time off from the hospital. He's never been on vacation. You'd be looked after night and day by the best doctor in the whole hospital. We'd be like your Hospice service." Emmett said seriously.

I sat up straight and looked at Emmett.

"Would that be better for Edward?" I asked.

Emmett nodded.

I turned to Edward. He raised his eyebrows.

"Do you really want me at your house, night and day, for a month?" He asked Emmett.

"I'm not leaving here until you agree to come." Emmett said.

Edward paused.

"Do you really want Bella at your house, all day everyday, for a month?"

"I'm not leaving here until she agrees to come."

Edward paused again.

"Ok."

Emmett let out a breath he seemed to be holding.

"Right now." He said.

"Sure." Edward took his arms from my waist and gently rolled me off of him.

"Can you walk?" Emmett asked.

"Not far."

Emmett went out into the hallway and came back with a hospital wheelchair.

Edward turned to me. He stroked my cheek and kissed my forehead. "Can _you_ walk?" He asked me. I was still sobbing. I shook my head but got up anyways, only to collapse onto the floor.

"Can you carry her?" Edward asked, glancing at me with a worried expression.

"Yep." With that, Emmett picked me up and cradled me like a baby. "Not a problem."

Edward got into the wheelchair and pushed himself out the door, me and Emmett close behind.

"Are you okay, Bella?" Emmett whispered.

I shook my head. "I don't want to lose him, Emmett. I can't. I can't. I can't…"

"Shhhh, it's okay. Carlisle will take good care of him. Of both of you."

"Does your family know we're coming?" I asked.

"Yes, they're setting up his room."

I hiccupped.

"I can walk." I said. Emmett looked down at me, hesitating, but then put me down. I walked up behind Edward's wheelchair and started pushing him. He looked up at me in surprise. I grinned and bent down to kiss him.

"Let's go meet Emmett's rich family and see their mansion!" I said excitedly.

Emmett laughed and led the way to the check out desk.


	4. Emmett's Rich Family

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Ok, Rosalie is much nicer in my story. I have a reason for that! Rosalie only hated Bella in Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse/Breaking Dawn (wait...did she hate her in Breaking Dawn? Maybe not...) because **

**1) In Edward's eye, plain Bella is more beautiful than gorgeous Rosalie**

**2) Bella wants to be a vampire, resulting in her never having kids (which we know didn't happen. So Rosalie can cross that off her list)**

**3) Bella was a nuisance-ridden human in a vampire's life.**

**So this is why Rosalie is nicer in my story:**

**1) Edward met Bella first and they were already in love when they met Rosalie, and Rosalie already had Emmett so that thought never crossed **_**anyone's**_** minds.**

**2) Bella (and Edward) have no idea about vampires (yet). Plus, even when Bella is a vampire (not really a spoiler, that's a huge part of the main plot and was in the summary) it wasn't her choice to be turned so Rosalie can't be bitter for her never having kids.**

**3) It's not just Bella that's the human, it's Edward too. And **_**Emmett's**_** the one that wanted them both there, so you know Rosalie has got to be fine with it. And when they meet again, Bella's not a human anymore so she can't be a nuisance-ridden human. **

**That's why Rosalie is a little OOC (as in she's not as much of a bitch). Everyone ok with Rosalie being nice? No? Too bad. ; ) **

**~Emmett**

**

* * *

**

Chapter 3 – Day 1: Emmett's rich family

Song: The Truth About Heaven by Armor for Sleep

Walk past my grave in the dark tonight,

Saw the stone and the note you left for me,

to answer your question I just had to leave,

I just had to leave,

But that's not why I'm here,

I came down here to tell you it rains in heaven all day long,

I wanna find you so bad and let you know

I'm miserable up here without you, miserable up here without you

Found my way back in the dark tonight,

Couldn't wake up not right next to you,

I'd trade in forever to just hear you say the sound of my name,

But that's not why I'm here,

I came down here to tell you it rains in heaven all day long,

I wanna find you so bad and let you know

I'm miserable up here without you, miserable up here without you

Don't believe that it's better when you leave everything behind,

Don't believe that the weather is perfect the day that you die,

Don't believe that the weather is perfect the day that you die

I came down here to tell you it rains in heaven all day long (all day long),

I wanna find you so bad and let you know

I'm miserable up here without you, miserable up here without you

[x2]

Don't believe that the weather is perfect the day that you die

Bella's POV

"I can walk up the stairs." Edward crossed his arms across his chest.

"But it'd be easier—" Emmett tried again.

"No! You are _not_ carrying me!"

"But you'll fa—"

"You are _not_ carrying me!"

"Fine! But I'll laugh at you when you fall down the stairs and you'll never get my voice singing 'I TOLD YOU SO! I TOLD YOU SO!' out of your head." Emmett threw his arms up in defeat and sat in a chair by the base of the stairs.

"Do you want me to—" I started.

"No! I can get up a staircase by myself! I'm 17, not a baby!"

I was slightly hurt by his harsh words, but I knew why he wanted to do this by himself.

He didn't want his cancer to defeat him. He didn't want it to rule his life, to control everything he did. I knew he often though that people take simple things – like walking up stairs – for granted. But Edward wanted to win those little victories. If he makes it up these stairs without help, he'll have his dignity, and he'll have proof that if his sickness kills him, he at least didn't go out without a fight.

Ten minutes later, at least, he was 3/4 of the way up. Emmett was patient the whole time, not once sighing or asked him to hurry up or making fun of him. I think he started to realize how important this was to Edward.

A few more minutes went by and he was at the top of the stairs. He put his back against the wall and slowly slid down. Emmett grabbed the wheelchair at the bottom of the stairs and carried it up to Edward. It was important not to say anything about it. Not a "Finally!" or "I'm proud of you!". We had to act like that was the most normal, everyday thing in the world. Otherwise we'd snatch that small victory right from Edward when he needed it most.

Emmett placed the wheelchair right in front of Edward, who pulled himself into it.

"Where's your family, Emmett?" I asked.

"Esme and Rosalie are here. Rose is probably in out room and I wouldn't be surprised if Esme is out in the garden. Here, your guy's room is down here." Emmett said and walked to a room a few doors down and opened the door. There was one big bed with a few medical machines on the sides and behind it. There was a huge flat screen TV. A bathroom was a few steps away and a mini fridge was in the corner in the back.

"Well, it's _much_ nicer than my hospital room was…" Edward murmured. Edward was never bothered by money. He never had any money, but his philosophy was that if you had money, you spend it. Otherwise you hoard it away and that's just selfish. But he never needed, or wanted money.

"Let me get your stuff from the car." Emmett said.

A few minutes after Emmett left, Esme, Dr. Cullen's wife, came in to greet us.

"Hello! Welcome! How are you two feeling?" She came in and hugged us both.

"Ummm, fine, good." I stuttered.

"Thank you for having us." Edward said.

"Oh, it's no problem! We're glad to have you for as long as you want to be here!" She smiled warmly.

"Probably less than a month." Edward said.

Esme's smile fell.

"I mean that's how long the doctors expect me to live. If I could stay here longer, I'd do it in a second." He clarified.

Esme's smile came back, but was more forced than before.

"We'll make the most of the time we have, I suppose." Esme said.

"Yes we will! Especially since it's my birthday!" Emmett boomed, walking in.

"EMMETT! SHUT UP! I'M TRYING TO READ!"

That must be Rosalie…

Emmett put down our stuff, winked at us, and ran out of the room. A few seconds later we heard a shrill scream. I don't think Rosalie will be doing any reading anytime soon.

Esme sighed and turned to us.

"Well, Carlisle will be home soon, he'll come up to help with the machines when he gets here. We've already had dinner, but if you want something, our kitchen is always open. Take what you want, when you want it. I guess you're now part of the family!" She said, and glided out of the room.

"Well." I said, and sat down on the edge of our bed.

"Well, indeed." Edward said.

We stared at each other for a few minutes, then burst into laughter.

"This will be fun." I said.

"With Emmett, _everything_ is fun." Edward replied. He rolled closer to the bed, stood up, and flopped down next to me.

I laid on my back, mirroring his position, and turned my head toward him.

"Hey." I whispered.

"Hey yourself." I whispered back.

"I love you." I inched toward him.

"I love you more." I smacked his arm.

"Do not!"

"Do too."

"Do not!"  
"Do too."

"Do _not_!"

"Do too."

"UGH!" I threw my arms over my head and grabbed the sheets.

"Ha. So you agree…" I heard the smile in his voice.

"You only wish."

"He laughed, then inched his way to me, on his side, so his whole front was pressed against my side. He unhooked my arms from the sheets and placed them around his neck. I tightened my grip around his neck while he wrapped his arms around my waist and turned me so we were front to front.

"I love you." He said.

"I love you m—"

"Don't you start." He said and pressed his lips to mine.

"I can't live without you, Edward." I murmured.

"You'll have to in a month." He responded. I tucked my head in the crook between his shoulder and neck and shook my head.

"I'd rather die."

"Don't say that, Bella. You have your whole life ahead of you."

"Not without you. MY life is nothing unless you're in it."

"Bella, you will live. Your life will go on. Even without me. There will be someone else." His voice faltered at the end.

"No. No one else will ever touch me. I'd become a nun before I even _considered_ other people."

"Then you'll be a happy nun."

"Edward."

"Bella."

"There is no life without you."

"There is no heaven without you." **(A/N: This is where the chapter song comes into play. Don't hate me, this is the best I could think of for this chapter!)**

"At least in heaven you'll be able to watch me. I won't get to see you until I die." I said.

"I know, that'll be a long time from now." He said sternly.

"No. I'll meet you there before you have a chance to say "Howdy!" to God."

"Why would I say 'howdy' to God?" He laughed.

"Because you're secretly a cowboy."

"Well, it's not so much of a secret now that you know, is it?"

"It can be our dirty little secret."

"I like dirty little secrets!" Emmett yelled, bursting into the room. He was doing that a lot today.

"It wouldn't be a secret if we told you." I said.

"But I wanna know!" He whined.

"Nope." I said.

"Well fine, 'lil lady! I'll just round up 'em horses an' ride into the sunset without y'all!" Emmett said, picking up a southern drawl.

My mouth dropped.

"How did you hear us?" I asked.

"Hear what, 'lil lady?" He said, still in his southern accent, with a wink.

"EMMETT!" Rosalie screeched. Thank you, Rosalie.

"Y'all come back now, ya hear?" Emmett said and turned to leave.

It was silent for a few minutes.

"Well. Emmett's one strange boy." I murmured.

Edward laughed.

"You hungry?" I asked. Edward nodded. It had been a long day and it seemed to go by in a flash.

"Let's see what's in our mini fridge." I said, getting up. Just soda. "I'll go down to the kitchen. What do you want me to grab for you?"

"Whatever you're getting." He sighed.

I headed down to the kitchen where I saw Rosalie reading a fashion magazine.

Rosalie was blonde, and the most beautiful person I had ever seen. She didn't acknowledge my presence but I knew she knew I was there. I opened the fridge to find it completely stocked with every food imaginable. I didn't even want to _think_ about how full the pantry was.

I grabbed stuff to make a sandwich and grabbed bread from the counter, making two sandwiches.

"So, are you gunna stay over night?" Rosalie asked abruptly.

"Uh, no. It's a weekday. My dad, Charlie, only lets me stay the night at the hospital on weekends. Weekdays I have to come home." I responded.

"But it's summer. It's not like you have homework." She said.

"I know. Charlie says that Edward can't be my whole life. That I'll be that much more crushed when he dies because I don't 'have a life outside of him'."

"Your dad sounds like a jerk."

"Naw, he just worries about me. He's concerned what Edward's death will do to me." I choked.

"What _will_ Edward's death do to you?" She asked.

"It'll kill me."

She was silent for a while before she replied. "That's understandable. I couldn't live without Emmett if anything ever happened to him." I nodded. "Don't kill yourself, though." She suddenly said.

"What?" I asked, shocked.

"Even if Edward…dies…don't kill yourself. He wouldn't want you to." She said. I was too surprised to say anything for a minute.

"I…a…uh…gotta go take this to…Edward." I said grabbing the sandwiches and heading upstairs. I saw Rosalie turn back to her magazine.

As I was heading up the stairs, Emmett rushed down the stairs, almost running me over.

Weird…

I got to Edward's room, opened the door, and went to sit next to him when I noticed he was holding his nose.

"Another one?" I asked.

"Yeah." He said. Edward was getting more and more bloody noses much more frequently now. I always had to sit far enough away so I didn't smell the blood, otherwise I'd get nauseous and would be no help to Edward, what so ever. But this was going to get more frequent. I had to get over it. So I crawled in next to him, grabbing more tissues, and handing him his sandwich. He looked at me, shocked.

"Bella, I don't want you fainting." He said.

"And I don't want you to suffer alone. I'm here for you, here _with_ you." I smiled.

He grinned back. I leaned in for a kiss but he stopped me.

"I'm still bleeding, Bella."

"Oh. Well, hurry up and stop! I wanna kiss you!" I whined. He laughed and I leaned on his shoulder.

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you too, Edward." I said and took a bite out of my sandwich.

Edward turned on the TV and we watched kids cartoons. When his nose was done bleeding he ate his sandwich, his arm around me.

Another happy memory to be stored away for future recollection.

* * *

**A/N: 'Ugh. Another long authors note! Shoot me now!' That's what you're thinking, right? Yeah, sorry. But I just gotta say something. WHERE IS EVERYONE!!! As far as I know, there are only 2 people reading my fricken story! **

**That makes me sad D': (my sad face)**

**So if you're reading this, PLEASE leave a review/comment. You don't actually have to REVIEW it, I just wanna know how many people are actually reading this. **

**See that little button down there? Yeah, the one that says "Review this story/chapter". Would you mind giving that a little tap? Maybe just say "Hiya!" Because honestly, I just wanna know how many people are reading this.**

**You can say "Hey, this is good!"**

**You can say "This sux." (though that would make me sad.)  
**

**You can say "I'm reading this!"**

**You can say "Hi, Emmett!"**

**You can say "Hi Jessica!" (though I don't think Jessica will see it, it's worth a shot.) (don't know who Jessica is? Or why I'm referring to myself as Emmett? Go look at my profile, silly goose!)  
**

**You can tell me your favorite ice cream flavor. Though that's not at all productive. It at least shows you weren't lazy and you actually clicked on that damn button.**

**You can say whatever you want! Seriously! I just wanna know how many people are reading this. (Wow, I wonder how many times I've said that in this one authors note. I went back and looked. That's 3 times I've said "I just wanna know how many people are reading this". Now it's 4.)**

**Do you think they get the point, Jessica?**

**...**

**Jessica?**

**Aw. She was so bored by my author's note she left. **

**If you're still reading this, and you review saying that you read all of it, I'll give you a preview of the next chapter! (How's that for bribery!) Of course by saying that I'm actually assuming people enjoy reading my story...WHICH I DON'T KNOW BECAUSE I ONLY HAVE 2 REVIEWS! *sob***

**BTW, thank you .x and xoier118 for reviewing. MUCH appreciated. And hey, if you're the only two reading my story, that's cool too ;)**

**Anyway. This was a very desperate author's note. I just reread it and I had the huge urge to just delete it and be happy with what I got. I almost did. Almost.**

**~Emmett  
**


	5. Intervening

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: This is when Bella and Edward are talking to Esme in their room. The part in italics is a flashback. **

**

* * *

**

Chapter 4 – Day 4: Intervening

Song: That one friendship song that everyone learns in Kindergarten (I couldn't think of anything better, plus, it seemed like an Emmett song to me. But that's just me…)

Make new friends,

But keep the old.

One is silver and the other is gold.

A circle is round,

It has no end,

That's how long I want to be your friend.

Emmett's POV

I put Bella and Edward's stuff down, winked at them, and 'ran' out of the room. I crept silently to mine and Rosalie's room, where I found Rose reading a magazine. I knew she could hear me, but I went up behind and put my hands over her eyes. She growled at me.

"Ah, ah, ah. Humans don't growl, Rose." I said, not moving my hands.

She let out a shrill scream in response, which scared me so bad I pulled my hands away from her face.

"Shit, Rose!"

"I'm trying to read, Emmett." She said, looking back to her magazine.

"What is there to read in a fashion magazine? Isn't is just pictures?" I asked.

"_You'd_ think that…" She said.

I plopped myself down on the couch next to Rosalie. We were quiet for a few minutes.

"I'm glad he's finally here." I sighed.

"But what about Bella?" Rose asked.

"_What_ about Bella?"

"What's going to happen to her when we change Edward?"

Oh.

Uh.

Crap.

"Ummm…I hadn't thought about that…"

"Of course not. You never think about _anything_ all the way through." She said, exasperated.

"Well, why do you ask?"

"Because Edward's death will crush her."

"We're not killing him. We're saving him! He'd die without us!" I said.

"But she won't know that! To her, he'll be dead! And he won't be able to live without her either."

I thought about this.

"Aw, shit."

"Yeah."

"Well…what do you think we should do?"

"Let Edward die naturally, like he's meant to."

"NO! He's here! We're saving him! He deserves it! He's my best friend and one of the greatest guys I know!"

"Ok, well, then I don't know. Figure this one out on your own, genius." She said, looking back to the magazine in her lap.

"Well, maybe it can be a human-vampire relationship." I suggested.

"Not while he's a newborn. Probably not for a few decades, in fact. He'd kill her." She said, not taking her eyes from her magazine.

"We can change her too." That had to work.

Rose looked up sharply.

"That would ruin her life. I would never wish this life upon _anyone_ unless it was a last resort. I don't even think you should be damning Edward like this, but I can sort of understand it. Bella, on the other hand, has no reason to be sucked into this life – this half-life."

"What makes it a half-life?" Uh-oh. I shouldn't have asked.

"You're not a woman, Emmett. You wouldn't understand. She'd never be able to have kids, be a mom, have a family. The one thing I desire most is the one thing I can't have. The one thing she wouldn't be able to have either." She spat.

"But that's you. Maybe Bella doesn't want kids." I said. Emmett, you gotta learn to keep your mouth shut.

"Maybe she doesn't now, but she will. And when she does she'll hate herself for what she is and hate us for making her like that, for forcing her into our damned existence."

"But she'll be happy because she'll be with Edward." DAMN IT, EMMETT! SHUT UP!

"She'll eventually want more!" Rose was getting very annoyed.

"_You_ want more, Rose. Maybe Bella won't." Aw, you're screwed anyway, say what you want, idiot.

"Bella's a woman, is she not?"

"Does every woman have kids?"

She paused, tilting her head to the side, thinking.

"I didn't think so…" Not the _smartest_ thing to say…

She gave a small growl, low enough so no one else in the house could hear.

"Aw, don't be like that! Everything will work out. Love always finds a way." I said.

"Oh, shut up, you sappy moron." She snapped.

"I may be a sappy moron, but I'm _your_ sappy moron." She smiled up at me, her frustration gone.

"And you'll _always_ be my sappy moron."

We just sat there for a minute, enjoying each others company.

"What're you thinking about?" I murmured.

"The day you convinced us all to go through with your plan 'Save Edward'." I laughed. That was a good day for me.

* * *

_It took quite awhile for me to convince Rose, Esme, and Carlisle that we should save Edward._

_"No, stupid! He's just another human!" Rosalie had said._

_"We shouldn't interfere, honey." Was what Esme told me._

_"We can't save everyone, Emmett. He really is a great guy but I see people who deserve to live, die everyday. It's sad and unfortunate, but it happens." Carlisle said, over and over, as if trying to convince himself, rather than me._

_"But guys, he's my best friend. He's barely had a life! No one would miss him—"_

_"Except Bella. Who would miss him like she was missing half herself." Rosalie had interrupted me._

_"Right, except Bella. But he's an orphan who basically lives on the streets. He has no friends and is way under the radar. And he's dying."_

_"We know he's dying." Rose hissed._

_"He doesn't deserve to die. He deserves a happy, long life with people who care about him! Like us! He's my best friend! And I _know_ Carlisle sees him as a son already. Esme, he could be another son to you too! And Rosalie, a brother!"_

_"I don't need a brother."_

_"It would make me happy." I countered._

_She hesitated, opened her mouth, then shut it again._

_"I…uh…ok." She gave in._

_"What?" I was shocked._

_"Ok! You have my vote to change him." _

_I got up from my seat at the dining room table that we only used for important meetings, and hugged her._

_"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I kissed her._

_She pushed away from me. "Alright, alright. I got it! You're welcome! Just don't regret changing him, Emmett."_

_I put her down and turned to Carlisle and Esme, raising my eyebrows, inquiring their answers._

_"He sounds like a fine boy, Emmett. If it would make you happy, I would love another son." Esme smiled warmly._

_My grin widened as I turned to Carlisle. His vote would be the most important._

_"Yes. I do already think of him as a son, and he is an excellent young man. I would change him." He said._

_I jumped up and down, clapping my hands like a little girl._

_"This will get complicated, though. We have to think about how we're going to do this." Carlisle continued._

_"Well, we couldn't just go to the hospital and do it there, could we?" I asked. Carlisle shook his head._

_"What happens when cancer patients are terminal? Do they spend their last weeks in the hospital or at home?" Esme asked._

_"A lot of the time at home, with organizations such as Hospice nurses coming weekly or as often as needed to make sure everything is as it should be. But Edward doesn't have a home, besides Bella's." Carlisle said._

_"And we can't change him at Bella's house." Rosalie said._

_"What if he stays here? We could be his Hospice care. You're certified because you're a doctor, Carlisle." I offered._

_Everyone thought about this for a moment._

_"Bella would be here with him night and day, though. When could we bite him?" Rosalie asked._

_"Does she sleep at the hospital with Edward?" I asked._

_"No, at least not everyday." Carlisle said._

_"Well, then we can do it a night when Bella isn't here. Someone will go to her house in the morning and tell her Edward died in his sleep." I suggested._

_"Oh, how traumatizing for the poor girl. She'll be in hysterics." Esme said._

_"It's the easiest way." I said._

_"Yes, I suppose it is. Alright. We're doing tests on Edward tomorrow to see exactly how long he has. The results will take a few days but when he know, then we can plan for when Edward comes here." Carlisle said standing up. Meeting adjourned.

* * *

_

I turned back to Rose.

"I'm glad you agreed with me." I said, grinning.

"Don't you be getting cocky. It's not gunna happen often." She said, patting my leg.

I laughed softly, then listened to see what Bella and Edward were doing. I just loved interrupting and embarrassing them!

"Why would I say 'howdy' to God?" I heard Edward ask.

"Because you're secretly a cowboy." Bella responded.

"Well, it's not much of a secret now that you know, is it?" He said.

"It can be our dirty little secret."

That's my queue! I ran silently to their door.

"I like dirty little secrets!" I said, bursting into the room. Humans are so funny…

* * *

**A/N: Ok, this author's note doesn't have anything to do with this story so you don't have to read it, it's about the movie (the Twilight movie, of course).**

**Ok, so have you all seen Holes? With Shia Labeouf? You know the thumb mountain? The one that looks like a thumbs up? **

**Ya. That's in Twilight.**

**I'm totally not joking. It's in the Arizona scene in the beginning, I think somewhere in between where they are driving in the car and the airplane takes off or right after it takes off. Seriously. My mom told me about it. So the next time that I went to the movie (I've seen it 3 times and I'm going again tomorrow) I was just looking at the mountains in the beginning. I wasn't listening to anything Bella was saying, I was just scanning the mountains to see if I could find it, or if it was really there.**

**And it was!!!!**

**I was like "MOM! I SEE IT! AAAAHHHHHH!" and then I started laughing my ass off...funny stuff man, funny stuff.**

**So when you go see the movie again (which you should. Because it's awesome) you should look for it and tell me if you see it. Because if some people actually see it, I might believe that I'm not crazy. I REALLY looked hard though, it's kinda in the back, but still the tallest. Yeah. **

**Go find it and tell me, because I don't think I'd enjoy it too much if I was crazy...**

**(also, when Jasper, Alice and Bella are in Arizona when James is tracking them, and they pull into the hotel, is it just me or is that a yellow porche in the back??? I'm probably just seeing what I want to see, because it's definetly yellow, and it looks kinda older, so maybe it's not. But I got pretty excited when I saw that too. If you see it and you can tell it's NOT a porche, don't tell me. I'd be ok with being crazy on this one. I love porches and if I mistook like a honda for a porche, I might have to shoot myself in the foot. And that would hurt. So don't tell me it's not a porche. It is in my mind.)**

**~Emmett  
**


	6. Weaker

**Hmm...you know what I saw as I was uploading this chapter? I hadn't edited the last chapter. I meant to change those "sh*ts" to "craps". My total bad. I hope no one got offended by my awful language....  
**

**~Emmett and my mouth that should be washed out with soup**

Chapter 5 – Day 4: Weaker

Song: Fix You by Coldplay **A/N: *****sigh* Again, not a perfect fit. Lyrics don't really fit, but I like the lyrics so I put the, in.**

When you try your best, but you don't succeed

When you get what you want, but not what you need

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

When high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down your face

And I...

Tears stream down your face

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down your face

And I...

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

Bella's POV

We were sitting on Edward's bed playing monopoly.

"Ha! Free parking!" I said, grabbing all the fake money in the middle.

"You know in the real rules, free parking doesn't actually do anything." Edward stated.

"You just made that up cause I'm winning!" I said.

"No, really! Look in the instructions!" He laughed.

"Pfff, I don't need instructions! I'm winning and you're just jealous!"

He laughed. "Yes, Bella. That is _exactly_ it. I'm sorry for being jealous of thou, thy Monopoly God." He said, bowing to me.

I sat up straighter and held my chin in the air.

"Good. The first step to recovering is admitting you have a problem! I'm proud of you!" He laughed again, pushing the board onto the ground and pulling my close so we were sitting next to each other. He leaned back against the headboard and stretched his legs out.

"Come here." He said, patting his lap. I swung my leg up and straddled him and lay dawn on his chest.

He closed his eyes and sighed, kissing the top of my head.

"I love you, Monopoly God."

"I love you, lowly peasant."

He laughed. We lay there for a long time, losing track of time. I might even have fallen asleep.

That's when he groaned. But this was not a good groan. This was a painful groan. I immediately swung my leg over so I was off of him and then looked him in the eyes.

"What hurts?" I asked.

He lifted his shirt to reveal a huge bruise already starting to turn purple on his lower stomach and another fairly large one on his chest. Exactly where I was laying on him.

I gasped, my eyes already starting to fill with tears when I looked back into his eyes.

"Oh my God, Edward, I am so sorry!" I cried, wanting to hold his face in my hands but afraid I'd hurt him again.

"Shh, shh, love, shh. It's okay! Don't you dare stop touching me. Not feeling your touch hurts more than a few bruises ever will!" He said taking my hands and kissing them. I tried to pull away, ashamed that I'd hurt him, but he yanked me closed. "You stop that! It doesn't hurt that much! Besides, your kisses make it better." He said and pulled me down until our lips met. It was a gentle kiss, but only because I made sure it was. I could tell he wanted more but I was just to scared I would hurt him again.

"Love, I'm getting weaker. This is only the beginning. I won't make it a month without your kisses, your caresses, your touch. You can't be afraid you'll hurt me. Your touch is what I live for. Don't make me live without it." He whispered against my lips. With that, I added much more passion to the kiss, which I could tell he thoroughly enjoyed.

"That's my girl." He murmured.

I'd enjoy this while it lasted, because I knew he wouldn't be strong enough for these kind of kisses for long.


	7. And Weaker

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: This chapter is just Bella learning about leukemia. It's just information about the cancer, basically. If you think it's too boring, there's no huge plot twists in it that you **_**have**_** to read. (I didn't even want to go back and edit it...) The next chapter will be up very soon (7pm) so it's skip-able if you really don't care about the technical stuff. :) Honestly, if I were reading this, I would skip it. But some people might want to know, so, here ya go. **

**~Emmett**

* * *

Chapter 6 – Day 9: And weaker

Song: How to Save a Life by the Fray

Step one, you say, "We need to talk"

He walks, you say, "Sit down, it's just a talk"

He smiles politely back at you

You stare politely right on through

Some sort of window to your right

As he goes left and you stay right

Between the lines of fear and blame

You begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong?

I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best

Because after all, you do know best

Try to slip past his defense

Without granting innocence

Lay down a list of what is wrong

Things you told him all along

Pray to God he hears you

And pray to God he hears you

And where did I go wrong?

I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice

You lower yours and grant him one last choice

Drive until you lose the road

Or break with the ones you've followed

He will do one of two things:

He will admit to everything

Or he'll say he's just not the same

And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong?

I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong?

I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life

How to save a life

Bella's POV

Edward was right. That was only the beginning. Everyday he got weaker and weaker over the next few days. Eventually he couldn't make it down the stairs without help. On the 6th day Emmett had showed Edward the piano they had and Edward played it everyday. As he got weaker he had to take more and more rests between pieces. Now, after each song he was out of breath and had to take a break to lie down. I didn't understand how he could be so frail already. We weren't even halfway through the month!

Before, I hadn't wanted to know that much about Edward's cancer. I thought understanding it would make it more real. I internally thought if I just ignored it, it would go away. Obviously, that didn't work.

Not I knew that I had to know what's happening to Edward. If I ever wanted to learn, I'd have to do it now, before he died, because after would just be too hard for me. So on the 9th day of Edward's last month, when Edward was taking a nap, I went to find Dr. Cullen in his study.

I knocked on his door and he called for me to come in.

"Yes Bella?" He asked, swiveling his chair so it faced me.

"Well, Dr. Cullen, I was just wondering if you could tell me about Edward's leukemia. I want to know what's happening to him." I said hesitantly.

"Yes, yes come in, have a seat," He pointed to a couch on the other side of the room as he got up to sit on it himself. "On one condition." He said. I was not expecting that.

"And that would be…?" I asked nervously.

"Call me Carlisle." He smiled, and motioned for me to sit, which I did. Then he started. "What exactly do you know about it?"

"Nothing, really." I answered honestly. "Just that it's a cancer, it's killing Edward, and his mother, Elizabeth, had it."

Carlisle nodded, thinking. "Well, there are several different types of leukemia. The kind Edward has is called Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia, or CLL. It's the most common leukemia in adults, generally 55 or older. Children almost never get it, which is why it took so long to diagnose Edward. CLL also sometimes runs in families, so I wouldn't be surprised to find out Edward's mother had CLL. With me so far?" Carlisle asked when he saw my somewhat confused expression.

"Yeah, Edward has CLL because his mom had it."

"Probably, yes. Do you know exactly what leukemia is?" I shook my head. "It's basically a cancer of the blood marrow, which is why we tried to do a bone marrow transplant with marrow makes white blood cells, red blood cells, and platelets. White blood cells help your body fight infection, red blood cells carry oxygen to all parts of your body, and platelets help your blood clot. When you have leukemia, the bone marrow starts to make leukemia cells, which are just abnormal white blood cells, but a lot of them. Though they are a form of white blood cells, they don't work the same; they grew faster and don't stop growling when they should. Eventually the leukemia cells crowd out the normal blood cells. This leads to anemia, bleeding, and infections. Leukemia cells can also spread to the lymph nodes or other organs and cause swelling or pain. Now, Bella, you have to understand: Chronic Leukemia – the type Edward has – can _rarely_ be cured. Even if we knew what it was sooner, there's little chance it would have make a difference."

I nodded. I didn't trust myself to use words at the moment. It's a hard subject to comprehends: your love's blood is killing him. Something that is vital, and everywhere in the body, is killing him. Even though I know the answer will never truly present itself to me, I still have to ask "why him?". I didn't even realize I spoke the question out loud until Carlisle tried to answer me, but to no avail.

"I…I don't know, Bella. It really depends on what you believe. Some people might say it was just God's will, while others might just say you have to look at the science and conclude that his body was just weaker than most, and it had the misfortune to be infected with a deadly cancer."

"What causes leukemia?" I couldn't help ask.

"Experts don't know. There are risk factors, but none of which apply to Edward: exposed to large amounts of radiation; exposed to certain chemicals such as benzene; had some types of chemotherapy to treat another cancer; have Down Syndrome or another genetic problem; smoked."

"No, none of those apply to Edward." I sighed. "So, is there anything else I should know?"

"Well, we haven't talked about the symptoms, but you probably already know those." Carlisle said.

"Yeah, fever and night sweats he gets a lot. Headaches. He bruises really easily – which is getting worse. Bleeding, like bloody noses. Those are becoming more frequent. I know he can get sick really easily, and he's always tired and getting weaker. He's also losing a lot of weight and says he's not hungry." I said.

"Yes, when he loses his sense of taste, food will be absolutely disgusting to him, and we'll have to give him all his nutrients through an IV." Carlisle sighed.

"Wait…he's going to lose his taste?" I asked

"One by one. First his taste, then smell followed closely because those two are so much connected. Then eyesight, though he should be able to make out general shapes and colors. Hearing will go next, then his sense of touch."

"He won't be able to feel my touch?" Uh-oh. I thought back to a few days ago when he said he couldn't live without my touches. He's not going to like this at all.

"Once his sense of touch goes, he'll soon follow, a day, sometimes two, later. It's the very last thing to go, and he'll probably be so close to death he night not even notice."

I didn't know if that made me feel better or worse.

"Won't he go into a coma before he dies?" I asked.

"Yes, for him, about a week or two before he dies, but that partly depends on how quickly he deteriorates. It could be sooner or later, it's sometimes hard to tell."

I nodded.

"Is that all you were curious about?" Carlisle asked.

I nodded again. "I should get back to Edward to see if he needs anything." I murmured. I couldn't think of anything else I wanted to ask, and even if I did, I didn't know if I could handle anymore. I already knew too much about the deadly cancer than I ever wanted to know for any reason. I was watching it in action first hand.

I got up, thanked Carlisle, and headed back to Edward's room. He was still sleeping, exactly as I'd left him. He had bruises under his eyes as if he didn't usually get enough sleep. He was pale and I could tell he was having night sweats again. As I walked closer, I saw some blood trickling down through his nose.

I sighed. Not because I was tired of taking care of him – I would never get tired of that. If I had to care for him every second of eternity I wouldn't hesitate or complain for a minute. I sighed because I knew the reason I was taking care of him – he was dying. It wasn't shocking or unexpected, it just killed me inside.

I got a tissue, wiped it up, and threw it away before I could smell it. Then I got wet washcloth and laid it across his forehead to help with the night sweats. I would lie by his side until he woke up.

* * *

**A/N: Ok. I do **_**not**_** know that much about cancer. I haven't been through it, though I did know someone vaguely that did. This is all information that I got off of websites.**

**I promise that the story gets more interesting; it's not all about this. This is just part 1. Part 2 is **_**much**_** more exciting. I already have some of it written and I can't wait to get it up!  
**

**~Emmy**


	8. Energy Bursts

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

Chapter 7 – Day 11: Energy Bursts

Song: You Raise Me Up (by whomever you want it to be by. All of the versions are basically the same. I only have the Celtic Women version but since this is supposed to be Edward to Bella, maybe go with the Westlife or Josh Groban versions. These are the Josh Groban lyrics, though I don't know if there's a difference.)

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;

When troubles come and my heart burdened be;

Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,

Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;

Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;

But when you come and I am filled with wonder,

Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

Bella's POV

Edward wasn't bed-ridden yet, though that was where he spent most of his time because it was just easier and less tiring. But starting yesterday, he started getting these energy bursts. You know the feeling where you just can't sit still, and you have to go run around so you can calm down? That's how Edward described it. Though he physically couldn't play football with Emmett, or take a jog, that's exactly what he wanted to do, what he said he _needed_ to do. Emmett once said, when Edward said he wanted to run around, that he would be able to do just that, soon enough. Rose slapped him – hard – when he said that, but Edward and me were just confused. I suppose you could run and play in heaven, if you wanted to…

I walked into the room after making Edward and me lunch. Edward was out of his bed, putting a pair of sweats on. I set his lunch down on the bedside table, and walked over to him. It looked like he was having a very hard time getting those sweats on.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I steadied him and helped him get the pants on.

"Going for a jog." He replied.

"Uh…" I honestly didn't know what to say.

"Don't say I can't. I might not get far, but I'm going jogging." I sighed. His tone told me I couldn't convince him otherwise.

"Where do you plan on going?" I ask.

"The river. It's behind the house."

"Yeah, the Sol Duc." I sighed again. "Okay, let me get some sweats on too, I'm coming with."

He didn't say anything, just sat down and waited for me to change.

We headed down the stairs, getting ready to go, when Emmett stopped us, looking at us suspiciously.

"Where are you two going?" He asked.

"Jogging." Edward said, daring him to object.

"I don't think that's such a good i-"

"We're jogging. Period." Edward said, walking past him. Emmett gave me a slightly hurt and confused expression. I shrugged and followed Edward.

"I tried too." I said quietly as I passed him. Emmett was frozen for a second, then turned and hurried after us.

"Then I'm coming." He said.

Edward looked back at him for a second then said, "Sure."

"Emmett, you're in jeans." I said.

"I don't think we'll be doing much jogging anyway." He whispered, too low for Edward to hear, who was quite a distance ahead of us now. We were out the back door by now and heading into the forest behind the house, which led to the river.

Edward started jogging, at first at a normal pace, but then quickly slowed down until he was out of breath, when he had to stop and rest his hands on his knees, deep breathing. Emmett and I ran and caught up with him.

I placed my hand on his back while he caught his breath. We couldn't even see the river yet, but had a full view of the house.

"We can go back." I said soothingly.

"No," He wheezed. "I'm doing this." He straightened up and started jogging again. I looked at Emmett.

"This won't end well." He mumbled, jogging after Edward. I followed close behind.

"We kept up the pattern of jogging for about 5 seconds then stopping to catch our breaths. Well, this was Edward's pattern, Emmett and me just followed. We did this until we got to the river.

Edward stopped, sat down, and just watched the river flow by. Emmett stepped back and leaned against a tree while I sat down next to Edward.

We were silent for a longer amount of time than it took to get here (which is really saying something).

Edward turned to me abruptly.

"I'm sorry." He said sincerely.

"What?" I asked. What did he have to be sorry about?

"I'm sorry I drug you and Emmett out here." He said.

"No, Edward, you didn't drag us out here. We came because we wanted to." I said.

"Bella, I'm not a naïve 2 year old. You only came because you were worried about me. Emmett only came so he could carry me back to the house in case I collapsed."

I looked down. I guess I was acting like he was a 2 year old.

It was silent for a while longer.

"I'm sorry." I said to Edward.

"What are _you_ sorry about?" He asked.

"That I treat you like a 2 year old. I know you're not, I just worry about you. I'm sorry if I've been over protective." I said.

He put his hand on my face and stroked my check with his thumb.

"I know this is probably just as hard on you as it is on me, and I'm sorry I'm dragging you into all of this, not just out jogging."

"I'm glad I'm with you through all of this. I would hate to think you were going through it alone. I love you too much to care if this hurts me. I'm much more worried about you."

"I love you too, Bella. So much that I don't care if I'm dying. I'm just worried what my death will do to you."

"I really do hate it when you say you're dying." I mumbled.

"Bella, it's imminent. It'd be irresponsible to deny it or shove it away into a corner and ignore it. We have to face it and live with it. It'll make it easier when it actually happens."

I sighed. "Maybe." I had trouble believing that at the moment, though.

Another silence followed.

"Well, come one, jogging time is over." Edward said, trying to stand, though wasn't able to. I tried to help, but he would have to be carried.

"That's what I'm here for." Emmett said, stepping forward with a grim expression on his face. He picked him up and we started walking back to the house.

Hopefully these energy bursts wouldn't last much longer. They were tiring for everyone.


	9. Taste Loss

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. (which is extremely long...sorry...)  
**

Chapter 8 – Day 17: Taste Loss

Song: So Far Away by Staind (hmmm…not that perfect for the chapter but I'm running out of sad songs…so…)

This is my life,

It's not what it was before

All these feelings I've shared

And these are my dreams,

That I'd never lived before

Somebody shake me 'cuz I...

I must be sleeping

Now that we're here,

It's so far away

All the struggle we

Thought was in vain

All in the mistakes,

One life contained

They all finally start to go away

Now that we're here,

It's so far away

And I feel like I can

Face the day,

I can forgive,

And I'm not ashamed

To be the person that

I am today

These are my words,

That I've never said before

I think I'm doing okay

And this is the smile,

That I've never shown before

Somebody shake me 'cuz I...

I must be sleeping

Now that we're here,

It's so far away

All the struggle we

Thought was in vain

All in the mistakes,

One life contained

They all finally start to go away

Now that we're here,

It's so far away

And I feel like I can

Face the day,

I can forgive

And I'm not ashamed

To be the person that

I am today

I'm so afraid of waking

Please don't shake me

Afraid of waking

Please don't shake me

Now that we're here,

It's so far away

All the struggle we

Thought was in vain

All in the mistakes,

One life contained

They all finally start to go away

Now that we're here,

It's so far away

And I feel like I can

Face the day,

I can forgive

And I'm not ashamed

To be the person that

I am today

Bella's POV

_Over halfway through the month._ Just another depressing thought in my already depressed mind. As Esme said the first day we were here, we had to make the best of the time we had. We tried but it was hard to do fun stuff when you can barely get out of bed. So we usually brought the fun to Edward. Emmett played lots of video games with Edward on the huge flat screen TV in our room (I say _our_ room because even though I couldn't sleep here most nights because Charlie wanted me home at night, I spent all but those 8 hours here).

Esme put fresh flowers in Edward's room every other day, making the room smell like a field of hundreds of different flowers. She laughed with Edward, fretted over him, and cared for him as if she were his mother. Which is very understandable; Edward hadn't had a mother in 10 years and Esme never had a real son, besides Emmett, who is adopted.

Carlisle, besides handling the medical stuff like the machines and medications, also shared some of his wisdom with Edward. From literature, to science, to religion, to…everything. I hated being there when Carlisle was there – not because I didn't like Carlisle, he was another father figure to me. Just when he talked to Edward, every piece of advice or knowledge seemed like a secret; for Edward's ears only. I know that wasn't how Carlisle meant it to be, but I usually excused myself when they started talking about that kind of stuff.

Rosalie (who seemed a little egotistical) even sat with Edward sometimes. They talked about cars, though it seemed Rosalie was much more experienced on that subject. Sometimes we all played board games (I always won Monopoly).

When I was with Edward alone (which was most of the time) we just laid next to each other on his bed and talked. It was never boring, and I enjoyed all the time I could get with Edward.

Edward and me would eat all our meals together upstairs. It might have been a little rude that I never ate with the Cullen's **(A/N: Teehee. Naïve little Bella…)** but I couldn't leave Edward alone and it was getting to the point where he could barely make it down the stairs, let alone back up them. So we would always eat upstairs.

But today something was wrong. He didn't want to eat at all. Everything he put in his mouth he said tasted awful, or had no taste at all.

Then I remembered what Carlisle said the day I asked him about Edward's leukemia;

_"When he loses his sense of taste, food will be absolutely disgusting to him, and we'll have to give him all his nutrients through an IV…he will eventually lose all his senses, one by one. First his taste, then smelled followed closely because those two are so much connected."_

I went and told Carlisle that I thought Edward lost his sense of taste. Carlisle came in, checked out Edward, then agreed with my conclusion.

"Edward, we'll have to give you your food through this IV. That means when you get up you have to take the IV with you. Also, smell everything you can right now, because in a day or two, that sense will be gone as well." Carlisle said, hooking up Edward to an IV. Edward nodded.

Carlisle left and Edward motioned me over. I went and laid next to him. He tucked my head to his chest and put his face in my hair, taking a big whiff.

"What are you doing?" I giggled.

"Doctor's orders, love." He responded.

* * *

**A/N: I know it's short. Update come soon. And Emmett's birthday is coming up in the next few chapters, and I would really love some ideas of what Emmett should get. I have _a few_ ideas (like two), but they're not very good. So what would Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie, Edward and Bella get Emmett for his birthday? That he doesn't already have...my mind's going blank...help???**

**~Emmy**


	10. Smell Loss

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer.**

Chapter 9 – Day 19: Smell loss

No song. Too short.

Bella's POV

Edward smelled everything he could the next 36 hours. Mostly me. Today, the 19th day of his last month, was his last day to smell anything.

We were taking a nap, his nose in my hair like it had been the last day and a half. I woke up, but just laid there, enjoying the moment. I felt when Edward woke up. He jerked back a little. I sat up and looked at him.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He sighed. "Nothing unexpected." He said and tapped his nose.

* * *

**A/N: Don't be mad at me that it's so short! I _would_ post the next chapter immediately after this one, but it's Emmett's (Cullen, not mine) birthday chapter. I have it written...but I'm not really that happy with his presents...so I'm gunna sit on it for awhile until I come up with something better. I have a free day today so I have more time to think about it than I normally would, so hopefully it will be out today. More ideas would be nice ;)**


	11. Emmett's Birthday

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song (hmm...I'm not sure if anyone really does...). **

Chapter 10 – Day 20: Emmett's birthday

Song: Happy Birthday

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday dear Emmett.

Happy birthday to you.

Bella's POV

Today was the day we were here for. Emmett's birthday. Honestly, it was nothing huge. We decorated the whole house and everyone got Emmett a birthday present. Being not so well off, mine and Edward's present wasn't too spectacular as the other Cullen's would be.

Rosalie gave him a _huge_, gold-rimmed scrapbook full of pictures and mementos of her and Emmett. No one looked _inside_ the album (we were all too afraid we'd see a few pictures that would burn our eyes if we saw them).

Esme re-did Emmett's room, which he now _loves_. Esme fully equipped the room with a new TV, a Wii, Playstation 3, and an X-Box. **(A/N: I'm not one for product placements but I didn't just want to say 'new video games.' How lame would that have been?)** Who would ever have the _time_ to play all those games, I had no idea.

"Emmett, one of your presents is outside." Carlisle said. He looked up at him, surprised. I looked at Rosalie knowingly. My present was based off of Carlisle's present, and Rosalie had helped me pick it out.

Edward couldn't get out of his bed very well, so he couldn't exactly come down to see it with the rest of us, but Esme grabbed a video camera and recorded us while we were out of the room so Edward wouldn't be left out. We all got up and walked into the garage where Carlisle had his Mercedes and Rosalie had her BMW convertible. But there was another vehicle in there today. A huge red Jeep Wrangler stood there, new and shiny.

Of course we all knew that the Cullen's were extremely rich, so of course they could afford it just fine. Emmett just wasn't expecting it.

"No way!" He said, running up to the Jeep and getting in the front seat. He looked it over, and was obviously very pleased. "This is amazing! I love it!" We all laughed.

"Of course you do! We know you too well." I said. "In fact, while we're here, I'll give you my gift." I said. I handed him a small shopping bag that said "Tiffany's" on the front.

"What is this?" Emmett said skeptically. He eyed the logo on the front.

"Your gift! I saved up for a long time so you better appreciate it!" I said.

"Are you proposing to me or something?" He asked. There was a round of laughter from everyone.

"No, just open." I said. He looked at me hesitantly, then opened the bag.

"What the hell is this?!" He asked, pulling out a car-window sticker. Rosalie snatched it from his hands before he could read it.

"Wait, what does it say?" He asked. I giggled. Rosalie stuck it on the inside of Emmett's new Jeep where you could see it easily. It read in clear, bold lettering "Bitch on board." Esme, surprisingly, laughed out loud when she saw it. Emmett laughed the loudest. "Rosalie...hahaha...bitch...oh my goodness..." Emmett tried to talk. Carlisle shook his head but I could tell he was smiling.

"Wait guys, let me take this up to Edward." I said, waving the video camera and running upstairs to Edward.

I walked into Edward's room to find him on the ground halfway to the door from his bed.

"Edward!" I cried, throwing aside the video camera and running to him. "What happened? Why are you out of bed?" I asked frantically.

"Nothing." He groaned, trying to stand up.

"No, Edward, what happened?!" I asked. He tried to hide his face as he struggled his way over to his bed. I caught a glimpse of his face, which was tear-stained. "Edward, what's wrong?" I asked, walking over to him and cupping his face in my hand.

"Nothing!" He said, trying to turn away.

"Edward, I know something is wrong. Tell me what happened." I said.

He sighed. "I'll sound like a whining toddler if I say."

Now I sighed. "No, you won't. Please just tell me."

He looked pained but I could tell he would talk. He hesitated but eventually started. "I heard you guys laughing." I must've looked confused because he sighed and elaborated. "I was jealous. And I wanted to be a part of it. So I figured I make myself be a part of it." He said.

"You were trying to get to the garage?" I asked. He nodded. "Oh, Edward." I hugged him close, then guided him to his bed, he shouldn't be standing too long. He sat down. I pulled away and kissed his cheek.

"That's exactly why I came up here." I said. I walked over to the door, where the video camera was laying. I picked it up and brought it back to Edward. We watched it together, Edward laughed and I laughed with him.

"Well, I knew I was missing out on something." Edward murmured. I turned and kissed him.

"Well I brought the fun to you, so it's all good." I said.

"Yes, it _is_ all good." He said, kissing me more deeply.

"Hey you two! No canoodling!" Emmett said, bursting in once again. The rest of the Cullen's were close behind. We sighed and broke apart. "I have more presents, right?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah, one from Edward, right." Esme said.

"Edward _and_ Bella." Edward said.

"Wait, I already got Bella's present." Emmett said.

I laughed. "That wasn't a serious present."

"Right..." Emmett said, pondering that, then turning to look at Rosalie.

"Don't look at me like that!" Rosalie said.

"Sorry." He looked down, ashamed. We all laughed.

Edward and I gave him a picture of the three of us together.

"Take care of that, pictures of me are few and hard to come by. That'll be a collectible soon." Edward said.

The cake was downstairs and too big to come up, so they all ate theirs down there. A little while later I went down to grab a piece for Edward and me. Emmett followed me up and sat with us while we ate.

"Sorry about the cheapness of our present. We really have no money right now." Edward said.

Emmett shook his head. "It was the best present I got." He said quietly.

"Happy birthday, Emmett." I got up and hugged him. "How old are you now, 119?" I asked jokingly.

He looked up, shocked, slightly confused, and a little horrified. His face relaxed when he saw mine.

"No, I'm not _that_ old." He laughed, but the laugh was forced.

I looked at him curiously, but he turned away from my gaze and looked out the window.

I turned to Edward. We had had the birthday party in here so he wouldn't have to get up.

Edward looked at me, blinked a few times, then rubbed his eyes.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

"Eh, nothing really. You were just really blurry there for a second." He mumbled.

"Edward, your eye sight's going." I said.

He sighed. "Yeah, I figured…"

Two days later, on the 22nd day, his eyesight was gone completely.

The day after that he was in his coma. One of the last stages to dying of cancer.

* * *

**A/N: ****Links to his presents (besides Esmes. That's all in your imagination. And Rosalie's. I couldn't find the one that I wanted. So basically just the jeep and the "Bitch on Board." Haha. That one still makes me laugh.) will be on my profile.**

**And, whoa, hey, did any catch those last too lines?!? Ha! I totally forgot that that happened because I wrote most of this so long ago! I just reread it to edit it and and I was kinda shocked when I read that! I was like "WHOA! Wait, what?!" Then I remembered what the next chapter was about and I was like "Ooooooooohhh yeah!!!" and it all made sense again.**

**I like it when things make sense.**

**That doesn't usually happen.  
**

**~Emmy**


	12. Hearing and Touch Loss

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

Chapter 11 – Day 25 and 27: Hearing and Touch

Song: Do you Realize? by The Flaming Lips

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face

Do You Realize - we're floating in space -

Do You Realize - that happiness makes you cry

Do You Realize - that everyone you know someday will die

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know

You realize that life goes fast

It's hard to make the good things last

You realize the sun doesn't go down

It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do You Realize - Oh - Oh - Oh

Do You Realize - that everyone you know

Someday will die -

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know

You realize that life goes fast

It's hard to make the good things last

You realize the sun doesn't go down

It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face

Do You Realize

Bella's POV

After he went into his coma, I'd lay next to him all day, just talking to him, holding his hand. Carlisle said he'd be able to hear me for a few more days. I noticed when that day finally arrived. The day he couldn't hear me anymore.

I'm not sure how I knew. It's not like he could make facial expressions or move his fingers to show when he's listening.

Crazy as it sounds (and maybe I'm just naïve about this stuff) but I 'sensed' when he couldn't hear me anymore. He lost his hearing on the 25th day.

I'd still talk to him, but now I'd just move his hand so it was touching my throat or lips, I knew he could still feel the vibrations when I talked.

I always kissed him, because I knew soon he wouldn't be able to feel them.

The day that happened, his loss of touch, was the 27th day. I knew the end was coming soon, I just didn't realize how soon.

* * *

**A/N: For the last chapter, I was seriously considering the teddy bear thing...but it was kinda predictable. Though it _would_ have been funny if Bella or Edward got it for him...because they don't know... Damn. I should've done that...though I don't know why they would get him a teddy bear if they didn't know that was his favorite meal...hmm...well...anyway. Haha, and maybe Bella's joke present wasn't that funny to everyone (I honestly don't know how funny it really was...), but I fricken cracked up when I saw that...yeah, I know I have a not so geat sense of humor...haha... I still giggle when I think about it. I'm so awful...  
**

**~Emmy**


	13. Dead

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Oh yeah, the day I've been waiting for! The end of (the boring-ish) Part 1! Believe me, after this it gets **_**much**_** more exciting. At least that's what I'm planning on.**

**~Emmy

* * *

**

Chapter 12 – Day 28: Dead

Song: Shadow of the Day by Linkin Park (it was either this or Valentine's Day by Linkin Park. Thank you Aden101 for the suggestion :) It honestly took me _forever_ to decide which, so if y'all don't particularly like this song, go listen to Valentine's Day.)

I close both locks below the window

I close both blinds and turn away

Sometimes solutions aren't so simple

Sometimes goodbye's the only way

And the sun will set for you

The sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day

Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

In cards and flowers on your window

Your friends all plead for you to stay

Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple

Sometimes goodbye's the only way

And the sun will set for you

The sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day

Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day

Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day

Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

Bella's POV

"I know you can't hear me, but I just have to tell you I love you. I feel like it's really important to tell you now. I love you, Edward. For now and always and forever." I said, rubbing Edward's hand. I was laying next to him, looking at his face, which was perfect even when he was so close to death.

No, now's not the time to think of that.

_Then when is? It's close._

No! Shut up! We have to live in the moment! We won't think bout what's it going to be like with him gone while he's here.

_We're in denial._

Are not! We just want to enjoy the time we have with him!

_Fine. But we'll have to face it soon._

Leave me alone!

_Just go back to talking to a deaf person…_

Hey! He is the love of our life! Be respectful!

_Yes, he's the love of our life, but he's dead. It's not normal to talk to dead people._

He is _not_ dead!

Brain dead.

_Shut up! You're interrupting my time with him!_

"Bella?" Emmett had walked into the room. I hadn't even noticed, I was too busy arguing with myself.

"Yeah?" I asked, turning towards him.

"Charlie called. He says it's time for you to go home."

I sighed. I wish I could stay with Edward forever. But Charlie wants me home.

I lent down, kissing Edward on the forehead, and got up, following Emmett downstairs. He always picked me up to take me here and to drop me off again, so I followed him out to his huge jeep. He always had to help me up.

"Wait!" Rosalie called, running outside after us. She stopped in front of us, silent for a minute.

"Yes, Rose?" I asked.

"I just wanted…to…uh…I just wanted to….uh…"

"Rose! We gotta go! _What_ do you want?" Emmett asked, an evil glint in his eye. Rosalie glared at him. Then she reached out and pulled me into a hug.

From Rose, this was mind-blowing.

I was frozen in shock for a second, but then hugged her back. We stood there like that for a long time.

I blew a piece of Rosalie's hair out of my face. "Uh…Rose? I _really_ appreciate this, even though I'm a little incredulous, but I gotta go home. Charlie's gunna throw a fit." I said.

"Oh, yeah." She said, and let go. She stood there, awkward, for a minute. "I'll just…go…" She said, practically running into the house.

Emmett lifted me into the car, buckled my seat belts (I could never do that, either. There were so many!) and walked around the other side.

Once we were down their driveway, I asked Emmett, "What was that all about?"

He laughed. "Rose doesn't like to show her emotions. But she cares about you and Edward, and that was her way of showing it. She's a little rusty on hugs. I haven't seen her give one in dec-…years."

I thought about that for a minute.

"Bella?" Emmett said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"I…I don't know how to say this…ummm…uh…" He struggled.

"Come on, Emmett, spit it out." I jokingly punched his arm, grinning.

He sighed. "We're…moving…" He said softly. I almost didn't hear him. Almost.

My grin only faltered for a second.

"Could you repeat that? I didn't quite catch it." I said sweetly.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. Truly sorry. I wish we didn't have to. But once Edward…(cough)…well, we just can't put it on hold any longer after that." He said a little bit louder.

They were moving? Right after Edwards…death? When I'd need them most? Is he _serious_?

I was still grinning. I just couldn't wipe it off my face, no matter how much I tried. It's like my face had frozen in horror and shock.

"We want to help you with the funeral as much as possible, so we're going to pay for it, and make sure everything get's done right after…he…dies." He said. That removed my frozen grin in an instant.

"He didn't want a funeral." I said.

"At all?" Emmett asked.

"He just wanted to be buried quietly. He didn't think anyone besides me would show up. Or course, this is before we met you and your family…" I said.

"That's alright. We can do that. A quiet funeral with just us and a priest. Is that ok?"

"Yeah, that's fine. But, I can't be part of the planning, Emmett. I was dreading having to think about that kind of stuff when it was just me and Charlie going to his funeral. Since you guys are…"

"We can take care or everything, Bella. Don't even think about it. It's no problem." Emmett said, patting my knee.

"Thank you, Emmett, I really do love and appreciate you and your family with all my heart – well, all my heart that isn't Edwards. Well, Edward has my whole heart…okay; let's pretend I have two hearts! You and your family have one of them, Edward has the other." I said.

Emmett looked at me funny.

"Hey! Don't you give me that look!"

"That was just a little weird, Bella…" Emmett said, chuckling.

"Shut up, I was trying to be sentimental." I said, giving him a slight shove and cracking a real smile.

"I know, Bella. And I love you with one of my two hearts, too." He said.

I cracked up, him along with me.

He pulled the jeep into the driveway and unbuckled me.

"There you go, lil darlin'. Y'all come back now, ya hear?" He said with a southern drawl.

"Yes suh! An' I'll be 'specting some o' yur apple pie next time!" I said, playing along.

"Oh, yes ma'am! My mama'll make the best apple pie in the whole south!" He said. **(A/N: Does anyone else just start talking with an accent for no reason? I do that often. Is that weird?)**

"Can't wait!" I giggled and jumped down onto the ground and closed the car door. I walked up to the front door and turned around to wave at Emmett, who waved back.

"Hey Dad! I'm home!" I called, opening the door.

"Bells, that you? I'm in the living room watching a game." He called. I walked into the dining room, seeing a half-empty pizza box on the counter. I sighed. He's been having pizza and TV dinners for a few months.

"Hey Ch-Dad. I'm just gunna take a shower and go to bed, ok?" I said.

"Sure Bells." He called from the living room.

I walked up the stairs, grabbed my pajamas from my room and went into the bathroom to take a shower.

I stepped into the hot water, standing in it, letting it loosen the knots in my back. The water hurt on some sore parts on my body. I laid with Edward everyday, all day, and I was starting to get some minor bedsores. Not fun.

When I had finished, I got out, got dressed, and went to bed. I'd be up first thing in the morning to get back to Edward.

* * *

I heard knocking at the door. I knew Charlie would be asleep and wouldn't hear it, so I had to get it. I sighed and rolled over to look at my alarm clock.

4:13 am.

Seriously?

I got up, grumbling, and stomped downstairs. Who would be here at 4:13 in the morning?! I opened the door, only to find Esme.

Esme?

I was so shocked I just stood there with the door open for a long time.

"Umm, Bella? Can I come in?" She asked softly.

"Oh! Yeah! Sorry, Esme, I'm just surprised you're here." I said, stepping back to let her in.

I waved her in and told her we could sit in the living room. She took a seat as I closed the door.

I sat next to her on the couch and she grabbed my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. I looked into her eyes, confused. They were filled with sadness, and her face didn't try to hide it.

"Esme!" I said, surprised. What could have her so sad? "What's…" Oh no. "wrong?" As the last word came out, realization hit me like a ton of bricks. No, that wasn't even the right way to describe it. It was more like the universe just imploded on it's self in a major apocalypse. But I had to stand there, witness it all, watch the deaths and torture of everyone, when I could do nothing. I had to watch the world end in a fiery hell. The smell of sulfur in the air, clinging to my clothes, so when the fires were out, the volcanoes had stopped erupting, I still had to smell them. I still had to taste the bitterness of smoke in my mouth. I had to watch it over and over and over again. It was like that apocalypse took hundreds of years, and all around me for all that time was only death and destruction. And at the end of it all, my heart was ripped right out of my chest, and I watched it destroy itself. Because now my heart was gone.

That's what it felt like when I realized Edward was dead.

That's when I fainted.

* * *

Edward's POV **(A/N: Ok, I don't know if someone so far gone in death can actually think and be that conscious, but for the sake of the story, let's say they can, even if they can't.)**

I couldn't see. So I couldn't see them as they stood in the doorway.

I couldn't hear. So I couldn't hear them approach.

I couldn't feel. So I couldn't feel them puncture my wrist.

I couldn't see. But my eyelids shot open.

I couldn't hear. But I screamed at the top of my lungs.

I couldn't feel. But I could feel the fire in my wrist, shooting up my arm. I could feel fire start in my other wrist, in my neck. I could feel the fire spread in my veins, until my whole body felt like it was in flames from the inside. I could feel my heartbeat pick up speed from an almost dead stop, then slowly, slowly, go back down.

The fire lasted for what seemed an eternity. I eventually could see forms, shapes, people in my room. I could eventually hear them murmuring. I could feel someone holding my hand.

But I didn't think about _any_ of this until afterward. Throughout it all, I was only thinking of Bella. About how much I was glad that she didn't know how painful death was. I was thinking about her face, her voice, her kisses.

Just her. Just Bella.

Then the fire stopped.

"Bella!" I gasped.

* * *

**A/N: I wanted to end it at the fire starting in his veins, but I got carried away. Hope you don't mind. Now on to the exciting part! ON-WARD! (I know, so many authors notes in this chapter, my apologies. I just love talking! ;D If you haven't noticed already.)**

**Oh and it might be a little bit longer for Part 2 to start because I want to have a few chapters done before I start posting them. How cruel, right? I just don't want to rush the chapters, and if I don't rush it, it could be weeks before I post a new chapter. So if I do this, it's just a few days between this and the next one. I think I have 2 chapters finished of Part 2 as of now and I want at least 5 done. Of course I can't wait for winter break to start! Then I'll have a _long_ time to write! Yay!  
**

**~Emmy**


	14. Part 2

**Part 2 song:**

Blackbird originally by the Beatles

(for this, please listen to the Across the Universe version. It's slower and fits more with this particular story.)

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Black bird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to be free

Blackbird fly, Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird fly, Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird fly, Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night


	15. Saved

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: You guys made me sad :( 2 reviews for one of the most important chapters?? *sigh*  
**

**Part 2: Vampire**

Chapter 13: Saved

Song: All Fall Down by One Republic

Step out the door

And it feels like rain

That's the sound

That's the sound on your window pane

Take to the streets

But you can't ignore

That's the sound

That's the sound you're waiting for

If ever your world starts crashing down

Whenever your world starts crashing down

Whenever your world starts crashing down

That's where you'll find me

Yeah

God love your soul

And your aching bones

Take a breath

Take a step

Meet me down below

Everyone's the same

Our fingers to our toes

We just can't get it right

But we're on the road

If ever your world starts crashing down

Whenever your world starts crashing down

Whenever your world starts crashing down

That's where you'll find me

Yeah

Lost till you're found

Swim till you drown

Know that we all fall down

Love till you hate

Strong till you break

Know that we all fall down

If ever your world starts crashing down

Whenever your world starts crashing down

If ever your world starts crashing down

That's where you'll find...

Find me

Lost till you're found

Swim till you drown

Know that we all fall down

Love till you hate

Strong till you break

Know that we all fall down

All fall down

We all fall down

All fall down

We all fall down

All fall down

All fall down

Lost till you're found

Swim till you drown

Know that we all fall down

Love till you hate

Strong till you break

Know that we all fall down

* * *

_Previously:_

The fire lasted for what seemed an eternity. I eventually could see forms, shapes, people in my room. I could eventually hear them murmuring. I could feel someone holding my hand.

But I didn't think about any of this until afterward. Throughout it all, I was only thinking of Bella. About how much I was glad that she didn't know how painful death was. I was thinking about her face, her voice, her kisses.

Just her. Just Bella.

Then the fire stopped.

"Bella!" I gasped.

* * *

Edward's POV

"No, Edward. Bella's not here." Emmett said. I turned to face him.

"Why are you here?" I asked him.

He looked very confused.

"Because I…live…here?"

"No. Why are you in heaven? Or hell. Wherever this is. It's kinda hard to tell…"

He laughed. "No, no, Edward. You're not in heaven _or_ hell. You're not dead. Well, not in that sense."

"What?" Not…dead? How was that even _possible_?

Carlisle stepped forward.

_I wonder how he's going to take this…_

"Take what?"

"Huh?" Carlisle stopped, confused.

"You're wondering how I'm going to take what?"

"Oh…I…uh…"

"You're a vampire, man." Emmett said, clapping me on the shoulder.

It was silent. No one breathed.

Which I thought was weird.

I took a deep breath of air in, but realized it didn't do anything. I couldn't feel anything in my lungs.

I didn't have to breathe.

Emmett doubled over in laughter.

_Oh my God! His face! Hahahaha!_

I rolled my eyes. Of course my face looks funny, I just found out I didn't have to breathe!

"Emmett! _What's_ so funny?" Rosalie asked. Did she not hear him? I heard him say it loud and clear.

"He said my face looked funny." I said, turning to Rosalie. Emmett stopped laughing.

"What did you say?" Emmett asked.

"I just said what you said." I shrugged.

"He didn't say that." Rosalie said.

"Yes he did. I heard him." I said. What does she mean? Of course he said that.

_Edward? Can you hear me?_

"Yeah, I can hear you." I said, turning to Carlisle.

"Carlisle? What's going on?" Rosalie asked.

"I think he can hear thoughts."

Everyone gasped – though no one needed the air.

Suddenly my head was full of noise.

_What does this mean for-?_

_This could be really good-_

_This is bad-_

I pressed my hands against my ears to try to clock out the noise, but it didn't do anything.

"GUYS! STOP!" I shouted. Then I realized that it was only loud in my head. I didn't have to shout.

"Sorry." Emmett and Rosalie said. Carlisle bowed his head.

"Ok. Reading minds is weird. But could somebody explain the whole 'vampire' thing to me?" I said. That's when I felt the burning sensation in my throat.

"Well, we'll explain everything once we get back from hunting." Carlisle said.

"Hunting?" I asked.

"Well, you know vampires drink blood, right?"

I paused. Yes, I suppose I knew that. I nodded. "I'm not going hunting, Carlisle. You can't make me do that."

Everyone looked at me, astounded.

_His throat must be on fire! And he doesn't want to hunt?_ Rosalie thought. It was getting easier to tell the difference between talking and thinking.

"I'm not killing anyone." I said.

There was a round of _Oh_'s in my head from everyone.

"No, Edward. We'd never ask you to kill anyone." Carlisle said.

"We're like vegetarian vampires." Emmett said.

"Meaning we hunt animals." Carlisle continued.

"So don't be stubborn, go eat." Rosalie said.

Emmett and Carlisle started to leave the room and Rosalie pushed me to follow them.

_Now to go see how Esme's doing…_ She thought.

I easily caught up to Emmett and Carlisle.

"What happened to Esme?" I asked, concerned. She was like a mother to me. Emmett and Carlisle exchanged glances.

"Nothing." Emmett said.

"That's a lie. Why else would Rosalie need to go see how she's doing?" I asked. I couldn't get anything from their thoughts; they were trying hard not to tell me something.

"Esme hasn't been to the house in a few days. She's been…taking care of some things. Rosalie goes to help her sometimes." I could tell Emmett wanted me to drop the subject, and as long as Esme was okay, I wouldn't put him on the spot.

It wasn't until we stopped that I realized that I'd been running. _So fast_. The trees had been a blur, but I hadn't hit anything bigger than a leaf.

"So…how does this work?" I asked.

"It's second nature. Just listen. Your instincts will take over." Carlisle said.

I closed my eyes and listened like he'd said.

I heard a heartbeat. I smelled it. I ran to it. I set my eyes on my first meal: a mountain lion.

* * *

Bella's POV

I'd been crying for three days straight. Esme never left my side. Rosalie came by occasionally. They cleaned, they cooked (well, they got T.V. dinners. Turns out they don't know how to cook at all), they comforted me, they would update me on funeral arrangements. The funeral was tomorrow, four days after his death. They wanted it to be sooner, but I was so catatonic that I couldn't do anything besides cry. There were so many emotions in the house, I only saw Charlie once in the past few days. Charlie was never good with emotions.

After I woke up from fainting when Esme first told me, all I wanted to do was see him. I didn't care that he'd look wrong, or cold, or…dead. I just had to take one last look.

But Esme convinced me I wouldn't want to see him like that. That's not how I'd want to remember him.

And she was right. It didn't make it any easier, but she was right.

I remember on the second day after his death, Esme asked me if I had any pictures of him we could use at the funeral.

I thought about that. Did I? I ran upstairs and dived into my closet, where I kept my photo album. I found it and began flipping through it frantically. There were pictures of me when I was a baby, pictures of me growing up with my mother, Renee, back in Arizona. Me with Charlie in the summer, a few more with me and Charlie when I moved here to live with him.

But no Edward. I had no pictures of Edward.

I started sobbing uncontrollably. I didn't even hear Esme or Rosalie come in. I just felt Esme pick me up and sit down with me in her lap. She held me, and I sobbed into her shoulder.

"I'm sorry, dear. I shouldn't have asked."

I shook my head. Why was _she_ apologizing? I'm the one that never took the opportunity to capture Edward on film when I had the chance.

She patted my back. "It's okay. I know what it's like to lose someone very close to your heart." She said.

I looked up at her curiously. She nodded. "I lost my only son." She said. From behind her I saw Rosalie's eyes go wide as she tried to force herself to look calm. She walked up behind Esme and put her hand on her back. Esme tilted her head up as if she was listening to someone, but I didn't hear anything.

I looked up to Rosalie. Now it looked like she was listening to something. Then she took a step back and Esme turned back to me. This all happened so fast I was surprised I caught any of it.

"You…had a son?" I asked.

"Yes, a long time ago. Back when I was a little younger. It doesn't really seem that long ago. You see, I had a husband before Carlisle." Now it was my turn for my eyes to go wide. Esme and Carlisle were so perfect with each other; I couldn't imagine either of them without the other. "I was young, and my parents approved of him. He was abusive, but I couldn't leave him. I was pregnant, and even though he didn't care about it, I knew I couldn't care for the baby without my husband's money. I had our son, but he wasn't healthy. He died a few days later. What did I have to live for after that? That baby was the only thing I loved, and the only thing that loved me. So I went to a cliff, planning on killing myself. That's when Carlisle showed up. He showed me I _did_ have something to live for. And the rest is history. We now live happily together, with out beloved adopted children. I can't have children anymore…early menopause. But I love my children more than anything."

I was in awe. I hadn't known any of this stuff about Esme!

"What about your first husband? What happened to him?" I asked.

"Oh, he died before the baby was born. On-the-job accident. I couldn't say I'd miss him." She said.

"Wow." I didn't really know what to say. How are you supposed to react to that kind of information?

"But the point of me telling you my story is that you know, even though you've been through a terrible loss, and right now you feel as if you have nothing to live for, you do. You will. It can only get better from here."

"What do I have to live for here?" I asked.

"Charlie, for one. He'd be devastated if he lost a son _and _a daughter."

"Not to mention Renee." Rosalie added.

"And we couldn't live without you." Esme said.

I shook my head. "But you're all moving. When will I even see you again?"

"We can visit every so often for awhile. And we'll always have email." Esme said. I saw Rosalie look unsure. "We'll always be there for you, Bella. We'll always love you. All of us." Esme continued.

I just sat on Esme's lap as she rocked me back and forth like I was a baby. She really had the mothering-thing down. I couldn't ask for a better one.

**A/N: Too much of an abrupt ending? Eh. Oh well. **

**Oh, and Esme's story, did her husband actually die? And if he did, before or after she jumped off the cliff? Honestly I don't remember. If I was wrong, sorry.  
**

**~Em**


	16. The Funeral

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Aw, guys! Did that really seem like an ending to you guys?? I'm sorry, but this is nowhere near the end. I meant ending as in the ending of the **_**chapter**_**. Haha. Sorry if I'm confusing everyone! There are many many many many more chapters to go. Many many many. I promise.**

**Oh, and Bella's, Rosalie's and Esme's funeral clothes are on my profile (I didn't really describe them here...so...)  
**

Chapter 14: The Funeral

Song: I Will Remember You by Sarah McLachlan **(So perfect for Edward's POV! Once again, I am proud of myself. Yay! I can pick out songs! Yippie!)**

I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories

Remember the good times that we had?

I let them slip away from us when things got bad

How clearly I first saw you smilin' in the sun

Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one

I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories

I'm so tired but I can't sleep

Standin' on the edge of something much too deep

Its funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word

We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard

But I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories

I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose

Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose

Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night

You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light

And I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories

And I will remember you

Will you remember me?

Don't let your life pass you by

Weep not for the memories

Weep not for the memories

Edward's POV

After we went hunting, Carlisle and Emmett explained exactly what happened to me, what I now was, and what all I could do.

I was finally understanding it all, and just thinking about it when Rosalie came home.

I didn't try to, but I saw inside her head.

She was picturing Bella sobbing into Esme's shoulder.

I roared (which I didn't know I could do) and launched myself at Rosalie.

"What did you do to her?!?" I yelled as she struggled to escape my grasp.

"Nothing! I swear! We've been trying to comfort her! She's taking your death _really_ hard!" Rosalie wrenched herself away from me.

"My…death?" I asked, stunned.

"Duh. She can't know the only reason you're not lying in a grave is because you're a vampire. There's only one law, and that's we can't expose ourselves. Not to _anyone_." She said.

Carlisle and Emmett were standing in the doorway watching us.

"I have to see her." I said.

"No." She said.

"I don't care about any stupid rules. She needs me." I said, starting to walk out the front door. Rosalie stepped in front of me.

"No, Edward!" She hissed. I growled at her.

"Move."

"Not a chance." She growled right back.

I turned around to go out the back door, but Emmett was standing right behind me.

"I'm sorry, man. I wish you could see each other. I really do. But that can't happen." Emmett looked at me apologetically.

"We can trust her, Emmett. I _know_ she won't tell anyone." I pleaded.

"I know. She's the most trust-worthy person I've met. But we still can't tell her." He said.

"Why not?!" I asked.

"You'll kill her!" Rosalie cried, frustrated. I whipped around to face her and growled.

"I will _not_!"

"Edward, you're a newborn. You can't help it. _Maybe_ in a few years you'll be able to handle it, but not before then." Emmett said.

"You can't promise that! What if she has a husband by then? Plus, she thinks he's dead." Rosalie said.

Bella having a husband: the thought enraged me. But I knew it would happen. My whole life was fuzzy to me, almost no clear pictures or scenes. I do vaguely remember telling Bella she had to move on when I was gone. To just keep me in her memory, but get on with her life. I didn't like the idea in the least of another man touching her, loving her. But I'd rather see her happy with someone else than depressed and not moving on over me.

I stopped listening to Rosalie and Emmett. I walked back to the living room and sat down like I had been before. Somehow even the mind-voices were quieter when I concentrated on keeping them out.

_Oh no. She broke him._ I heard Emmett think, to me in a whisper.

I laughed, which broke my concentration. I'd get better at this with more practice.

"No, I just think Rosalie's right." I said.

They both whipped around and stared at me, stunned.

"What? She has a point. But the time I'm ready to _not_ kill her, she'll have moved on and I will never take that away from her. She deserves so much better than me. I have to give her what I can." I explained.

They didn't say anything. Were they speechless?

I concentrated my hardest on not hearing their thoughts. I'd wait until _they_ were ready to talk.

They didn't.

Rosalie nodded her head and went up to her and Emmett's room while Emmett sat down across from me on a big couch. I'm sure Carlisle had left once it was certain I wasn't leaving.

Emmett and I sat in silence for a long time. I was surprised how I never got the urge to fidget or move, so I didn't. Neither did Emmett.

After what was probably an hour or two, he spoke.

"How can you say that?" He asked, his voice subdued. It was the only time I had ever seen him serious.

"Say what?" I questioned.

"That you'd never go back for her." He said.

"It's the only gift I can give her."

"No. No, Edward. Maybe for right now, when you'd kill her, but how can you say that when you won't?"

"She'll move on, Emmett. She'll forget me and move on with her life."

"No she won't."

I jerked my head up in surprise.

"What do you mean 'she won't'? Of course she will." I said.

He shook his head. "You must not know her as well as I thought. Edward, she is broken. She will _never_ heal fully without you. From what I've seen and what Rosalie's told me, she is absolutely catatonic. The worst thing we can do for her is to leave her here alone while she's like this, but it's the one thing we have to do. We'll come back to visit, and when you're ready, you have to give her the best gift you possibly could-give her you." Emmett said.

I thought about this. "Ok, Emmett. If – when I'm ready – we come back and she's still miserable, I will show her I'm still alive. Then we'll see if she'll take me back. She might not though." I said.

"Oh, I'm sure she will." Emmett said, getting up.

I got up too and went to the piano. I played all night, and in the morning Emmett came down in all black.

"What's going on?" I asked as I saw Carlisle and Rosalie, also in all black, head out the front door.

"We're leaving for a few hours. Can we trust you to stay here for a few hours? Do not leave for _any_ reason." Rosalie said.

"Yeah, I won't leave. But where are you guy's going?" I asked.

"Your funeral." Emmett said, clapping me on the shoulder and walked out the front door.

* * *

Bella's POV

"Here you go, dear." Esme said, handing me a black dress. I put it on, in a daze. Today was Edward's funeral. Tomorrow the Cullen's were leaving. Not for forever, but it might as well have been. When they were gone, I'd have nobody. Sure, there was Charlie, but he's my dad. Not someone you hang out with a lot and tell all your secrets and feelings to. There were a few nice people at the school who would try and comfort me, like Angela and her boyfriend Ben. I'm sure Mike would, but only because he'd want to get with me. Tyler for the same reason. Eric would be more subtle about it. But I didn't want to deal with any of these people. They would all pity me and that's not something I needed.

I didn't look forward to going to school, but I _definitely_ didn't look forward to going to my true love's funeral.

"Come on, Bella. We have to go now." Esme said. I looked up to find I was standing in front of a mirror. Esme must have done my hair.

"Ok." I walked behind Esme out to the car. Rosalie had dropped off Carlisle's Mercedes, they were renting another to get there.

I'd never been to a funeral, so Esme was explaining where I go and what I do.

"We sit in the church while the minister talks about Edward's life. Then Emmett and Carlisle will carry the casket to the graveyard behind the church. We'll go up and lay our roses on the casket."

I looked down to find a rose in my lap. When did _that_ get there?

"That's when we say our individual good-byes. They'll lower the casket and we can stand there and just mourn, if that's what you wish. But I think the most important part is remembering and celebrating his life, not dwell on the tragedy." Esme said. We were already at the church. I was used to Emmett driving fast, even Rosalie when I was with her a few times, but I was surprised Esme drove over the speed limit as well, though she was much slower compared to Rosalie and especially Emmett. What's with the Cullen's and speed?

We were parked in the lot, just sitting in silence. I could tell Carlisle, Rosalie and Emmett were already inside; their car was parked when we pulled in.

I wasn't ready to go inside. Even though when I first heard the news I wanted nothing but to see him, now I didn't know if I could handle it.

"Esme?" I asked hesitantly.

"Yes?" She turned to me, though I kept my gaze straight ahead, looking out the windshield.

"Is this going to be an open-casket funeral?" I tried to hide the fear in my voice but I could tell she saw through it.

"No, dear. It's just like originally; we didn't think that that should be your last memory of him. It's closed-casket."

I let out a breath that I hadn't known I'd been holding. I breathed out in relief.

A tap on my window caused me to jump. I looked out to see Emmett standing there in all black with a grim look on his face.

He opened the car door for me and helped me out.

"Hey, stranger." He said.

"Howdy." I tried to smile. He grinned and pulled me into a bear-hug.

"I'd say ya look ri' fine der ma'am." He said, putting on a southern accent.

"Why, thank ya, suh! I reckon ya look mighty fine yourself." I said, playing along with as much enthusiasm as I could muster.

Esme came up behind me and gently touched my shoulder.

"Ready?" She asked.

I choked up the second I thought of going inside, but I knew I had to, so I just nodded. I almost fell over, but Emmett caught and steadied me. He leaned me against him and guided me into the church, to the front pew.

I was surprised to find that the Cullen's and I weren't alone. Angela and Ben were there, as was Mike and Eric. No Tyler though…

"I know you said it'd be just us, but Angela heard when it was and asked if she could come. Ben wanted to come and support her and the other's just kinda followed. Let me know if you want me to kick them out." Emmett winked.

"No, no. It's fine. If they want to be here we can't really stop them. I wonder where Tyler is though..." I pondered.

"Oh, I overhead Mike telling Eric that Tyler had a date with Lauren." Emmett said. "It sounds like he tried to get out of it to come here but Lauren wouldn't let him." He laughed. This made me giggle too.

Angela stood to greet me and gave me a gentle hug, while Ben nodded solemnly to me. Eric shook my hand and Mike jumped up enthusiastically to give me a bone-crushing hug.

We all sat down, the Cullen's and I on the first pew, Angela, Ben, Mike, and Eric right behind us. Now we were just waiting for the minister.

Charlie speed walked in a few minutes later, spewing excuses that he was late because of an incident at the police station like a volcano erupting.

"Dad, Dad, it's okay. You're not late, it hasn't even started yet." I said. He sat next to me, on the edge of the pew. On my other side was Esme, then Carlisle, then Emmett and Rosalie. Over the next few minutes, Emmett would lean over to get my attention and do stuff like tip an imaginary hat in my direction, or use a fake lasso, and even once stood up and pretended to ride a bucking bronco. That one got me giggling.

Finally the minister arrived and started the service.

About halfway through, Jessica came bursting in. She slid herself next to Mike and gave me an apologetic look which didn't seem very apologetic at all.

The minister talked about Edward's life the whole time, mentioning things such as his being orphaned at young age, moving from foster home to foster home until he was emancipated at 16 years, which is when he met me. The whole rest of the time was the minister naming off important dates for Edward such as the day he graduated high school early and got accepted to Harvard _and_ Yale. (He eventually decided he wanted to go to Dartmouth). He never got the chance to accept any of him acceptances, though.

After that, Emmett and Carlisle got up to carry the casket outside and to the car, which would take it to the grave site behind the church. Charlie and Ben got up to help them carry it and Eric and Mike followed soon after.

They carried it out to the hearse, which drove to the grave. Everyone followed in the cars they came in.

Once the casket was in place, ready to be lowered, the minister asked for a moment of silence. The silence was broken with Jessica giggling at Mike.

The minister said a few more words and we all put our roses on the casket. His job now over, he shortly left. Mike and Jessica weren't far behind, both leaving in her car. Eric came up to me, shook my hand again, then left too. Angela and Ben stayed a little longer, but were the next to leave, Angela giving me a hug, Ben another nod.

The rest of us (the Cullens, Charlie, and I) stood there for quite awhile longer. Charlie eventually hugged me and explained he had to get back to the station.

"Can you get home alright?" He asked.

"Not a problem, Mr. Swan. We'll gladly take her home." Esme said. Charlie nodded his thanks then left.

The Cullens and I stood there for much longer. I'm certain it was hours. None of the Cullens even moved. They didn't sit down and they barely fidgeted. Somewhere in all that time, Carlisle had left. He had given me a fatherly hug and his condolences, then left to go to the hospital, I assume.

The sun was starting to go down. It was twilight.

"Bella?" Rosalie asked quietly.

"Hmmm?" I responded.

"It looks like it's going to start raining. Maybe we should go now." She said.

"You guys go on. I can walk from here." I said.

"No, Bella. We promised Charlie we'd get you home safely. You can always come back tomorrow." Esme said.

"Come on, Bella. You must be starving! You haven't had anything to eat at all today!" Emmett said.

"I can't leave him yet." I whispered.

"Oh, honey." Esme wrapped me up in a hug. "You won't be _leaving_ him. You can always come back. And he'll always be in your heart." Esme said.

I nodded against her shoulder. I was numb. I couldn't argue anymore.

"Can we take you home?" Esme asked, pulling away. I nodded.

They all headed to the car, but I couldn't move. My brain refused to tell my feet to walk.

"Bella?"

Now I couldn't even talk. Come on vocal chords! Work!

"Bella? Can you walk?" Esme asked, walking back to me.

I shook my head slowly. At least I could do that.

"Can Emmett carry you?" She asked.

I nodded.

Emmett walked over, picked me up and walked over to the Mercedes. Carlisle had taken the rental car.

Esme sat in the back and Emmett placed me next to her. Rosalie got in the driver's seat, Emmett in the passengers.

I couldn't even sit up. I slid down until I was laying across the back seat on my side. Esme placed my head in her lap and brushed away my hair.

With Rosalie's speeding, we were at my house seemingly seconds later.

Esme came in and stayed with me. Rosalie and Emmett went home, but said they'd be back at 10pm to pick up Esme.

I stayed in my dress. Esme tried to get me to put on some pajamas, but I just couldn't find the will power to get up and do it. Esme would've changed me herself, but I told her I'd rather be in the dress, and I'd change before I went to bed.

We sat up in my room for a long time, sometimes exchanging a few words. Charlie came in at around 9 to check on me, then quickly disappeared to his room, and promptly fell asleep.

At 10, Rosalie pulled up.

"Call us anytime. We're moving tomorrow, but we'll all be sure to see you again before we go." Esme said. I nodded. She hugged me, then left.

I just sat there for 2 hours. I didn't want to do anything. I didn't want to get up and change, I didn't want to go down and watch TV. I couldn't sleep. I looked at the clock to see it was 12:01 am. Well, there was _one_ thing I wanted to do. And it was 'tomorrow'.

I'm going to go see Edward.

I tip toed downstairs, careful not to wake Charlie, got in my truck and drove to the cemetery.

I found Edwards grave. He was already in the ground, the top layer of dirt still soft.

And it was raining. Rosalie had been right. But I barely noticed.

I stood there and eventually fell to my knees in the mud.

Edward.

My Edward.

Was.

Gone.

I wish I could cry. But I had been crying for 3 days straight. I literally had no more tears.

I stayed there for what seemed like forever.

That's when I heard someone behind me.

I turned sharply to see a man with blond hair tied back standing behind me. He didn't have any shoes and his pant legs were covered in mud.

He cocked his head to the side when our eyes met.

"Hi." He said. "My name's James, and I'll eat you now."

**A/N: Oh. Snap.**


	17. James

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

Chapter 15: James

Song: James by Blue October **(teehee ;D)**

Kneel down

Close your eyes

Hit the ground

I want you to, to kneel all day

Alone in this desolate cave

So I said

Scream if you want to

Cause no one is around

I want you to

To scream all day

Cause there's eleven words that I've rehearsed to say

And I say

How I love to hate you! [repeat]

You're

not so brave

When I'm the snake

And you're my prey

Let me tell you I'll eat all day

Alone in this desolate cave

So I say

Squeal if you want to

Cause no

no one is around

I want you to

To squeal all day

Cause there's eleven words that I've rehearsed to say

And I say

How I love to hate you! [repeat]

James, how I love to hate you

Oh, how I love

How I love to hate you...

James's POV

"Come on, James. We're done here." Laurent said. He tossed aside the human he had just killed.

"There has to be _something_ interesting here…" I said, frustrated.

"Come on, hun. We've been looking for days. There is _nothing_ in the northwest of America that is interesting enough to track." Victoria said.

"At least not on the Olympic Peninsula…" Laurent said.

"We can go west." I said.

"To the coast? Are you gunna track a _whale?_ There's nothing there! Just a few small towns that are full of poor humans! We haven't even come across a single vampire since we left South Dakota." Laurent said.

"What about the Native Americans?" Victoria asked.

"We just had some of those. Remember the hot-blooded ones?" Laurent responded.

"Ooh yeah! I liked the little girl…" Victoria said.

"We haven't gone all the way west. We haven't seen all of the northwest until we go as northwest as possible." I said, taking off running. Laurent and Victoria were close behind.

"There's nothing up here!" Laurent said.

"Fine! Then you guys stay here! I'll be back with a trophy of some kind!" I roared. Laurent slowed down to a human-paced run. I didn't wait up.

"You want us to wait for you?" Victoria asked.

"Yes. Just wait _here_ and I'll be back within a day." I said.

Victoria then slowed and went back to Laurent.

I kept running.

Jeez, there really was _nothing_ up here! And I was getting _hungry_.

A few miles back I had passed a sign that said "Greetings from Forks."

Greetings, Forks! Population: one less today.

I ran for a while. It was dark and raining. What human would be out in these conditions? An interesting one.

I caught scent after scent of humans, but all far away enough to tell me that they were in their houses. I wanted a wandering one.

I even caught a few vampire scents! So it _was_ worth it! I'd have to have fun with that once I got a meal.

That's when I caught it. A human scent, and clear enough that I knew it was outside. I followed it to the local cemetery. What a depressing human…

I crept up behind a human girl on her knees in front of a recently dug grave.

She looked so depressed, she probably wouldn't mind if I killed her.

Not that that'd stop me…

I made some rustling noises to get her attention.

She turned sharply and examined me.

"Hi." I said. "My name's James, and I'll eat you now." **(A/N: Haha, I just can't get over how much I love this line, though I can't claim it as my own)**

**

* * *

**

Alice's POV **(Just in case you were wondering, Alice and Jasper are vegetarian nomadic vampires, at this point.)**

"I don't know, Jasper. I haven't had any visions lately. Something would've come to me by now, I don't know what's wrong." I said. My husband, Jasper, and I were walking on a Washington beach a little before midnight. We were trying to decide what we were going to do next. My visions usually guided us to our next place.

"Don't get stressed, it's okay." Jasper said, taking my hand in his.

"I'm _not_ stressed."

He looked at me knowingly. Okay, I couldn't lie to my empathetic husband about my emotions…

"It's just like I know something really important is going to happen, but a decision hasn't been made yet so I don't know what it is." I said.

"It'll happen soon, I'm sure." Jasper said.

I gasped.

"Soon is now!" I cried.

My visions were _not_ usually painful. I only saw pictures. But this time I _felt_ the physical pain, and the emotional.

"This girl…in a cemetery…I can see…her name – Bella Swan! There…there's a vampire – James! Bella…she's hurt, emotionally. So much pain! She's dead inside. James – he's hungry. He gets closer. He…he…kills her. Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh!" I scream.

"Alice! Alice!" Jasper cries. I had collapsed.

"No! Jasper! We have to get there!" I clung onto the front of his shirt.

"But Alice, she's just a human. Human's die all the time. We'll just be getting in between a hungry, dangerous vampire and his latest, unfortunate meal." Jasper tried to reason.

"No! No, Jasper. She's – Bella's important! She'll be a _huge_ part of our lives if we save her! And, I get this feeling, these flashes, that if we _don't _save her, something very, _very_ bad will happen." I had gotten up and started running northwest, Jasper at my heels.

"Ok, Alice, we'll try. But if it comes down to it, I'm choosing you before her." He said.

"Jasper, if she dies, I will die. It's either both of us or neither of us." I said.

"What do you mean? I'd save you!"

"Jazz, I don't know exactly when, how, or why, but Bella Swan saves us all. If she dies tonight, we won't be far behind." I explained.

"What do you mean 'saves us all'? Is she going to save the whole world?"

"No, our family."

"Wait, wait, wait, Alice. You're not telling me everything ad I'm very lost. I can barely get a grip on your emotions. What family?" Jasper asked, running ahead of me then turning around to turn backwards so he could look at me.

"I'm not sure. I can't see faces or names yet, but I sense love and devotion and loyalty and trustworthiness and respect and responsibility and fun."

"You sound like an ad for the local YMCA."

I laughed. "Jasper, we're going to be in a family! Not a coven! Isn't that amazing!" I beamed.

"Yes, it is, but are they vegetarians too?" He asked.

"Oh yes, definitely. I get the sense of civility completely. They've been vegetarians longer than _we_ have."

"Hey, Alice, one more question." Jasper said.

"Sure, Jazz, whatever you want."

"How do you know where you're going?"

"Oh. Huh. I really don't. I'm just following my instincts, I guess. My feet said 'this way' so I'm going this way. Which way is this, by the way?" I asked.

"We're heading north, to Forks, it seems." Jasper said.

I looked up at the sky. By the position of the moon, I could tell it was almost exactly midnight.

I looked back into my vision and looked at the sky. A little after midnight.

It's happening tonight, soon. I hope we're not too late.

* * *

Bella's POV

"Hi. I'm James, and I'll eat you now." **(Yeah, I just made you read it again, what now, huh? Yeah, that's what I thought.)**

Was this some kind of sick joke? Is he gunna rape me? Is that what people are calling it these days?

"I don't think so." I said, standing up and facing the strange man, James.

He laughed. Creepy…

"And how do you think you're going to stop me?"

I reached for my purse, which had my pepper spray in it. Wait. Crap! I didn't bring my purse! Why would I? I'm at my boyfriend's grave in the rain and mud in the middle of the night…

"Well, I can always kick you in your man thing!" I said.

He laughed another creepy laugh.

"Man thing? Really? Ah, silly girl. That's not going to hurt me." He said, taking a step closer.

"Why? Did you get it removed? Are you neutered? Or not a man at all?" I asked.

This laugh was a little more annoyed.

"Oh, I'm plenty man. Don't you worry. But it won't hurt me, none the less."

"And why not?" I asked, taking a step back, which he countered by taking another step forward, which was bigger than my step so he was even closer.

"Because I'm a vampire." He said.

This made me crack up. Vampire? Was this creep _serious_? He must be absolutely psycho! Which probably wasn't the best thing.

"Oh, don't believe me?" He asked.

"Nope." I said.

"Ok." He said. With that, he was suddenly right in front of me. He grinned a creepy, evil grin, and lowered his head. I tried to back away but he grabbed my shoulders and stopped me.

"You're not going anywhere." He said. He took one of his hands from my shoulders and wrenched my head roughly to the side, exposing my neck. Was this guys serious?! He's going to fricken _bite_ me! Ugh!

Suddenly I felt his teeth on my neck. They were _sharp_! And then they penetrated my skin. I screamed in pain but he covered my mouth with his hand.

Was he _drinking_ my _blood_?!

And then I couldn't concentrate on anything. A shooting, sharp pain shot through my veins coming from my neck. I was on _fire_!

I screamed but was still muffled by his hand. I started thrashing. The pain was too much! He countered my thrashing by grabbing me by the waist and pulled me in close.

"Believe me now?" He whispered.

I couldn't respond.

I heard a roar from behind. Two, actually. Suddenly I was alone and James was 20 yards away on the ground. I saw a tall blond man speed after him, so fast he was almost invisible. I collapsed on the ground.

"Bella! Bella!" A tiny girl was on her knees next to me. Her hair was black and spiked; that was the first thing I noticed about her. Then I saw her frantic expression. "Bella! I can hear your heart; you're going to be fine. It's going to hurt for a while, but it'll be over soon, I promise. You will _not_ die. Though you are bleeding an awful lot. I'm not exactly sure if that makes a difference in your change…I don't think so, I think it's only your heart that has to be beating…" This tiny girl reminded me of a sprite or pixie. "My name's Alice, and that's my husband Jasper over there, killing that creep James. I should probably go help him, but I'll be back in a flash." She smiled at me then sped away. I was still thrashing but had managed to go from screams to muffled grunts. From where I was laying on the ground, I could see everything that was going on. The rain blurred my vision but I know what I saw. The tall blond, Jasper, had James' hands behind his back, though he struggled. The little pixie, Alice, was suddenly in front of James. She didn't hesitate. She jumped up (for she was significantly shorter than him) and tore his head straight off.

Whoa.

I saw Jasper rip his arms off, then they disappeared into the near-by forest. Soon after I smelled a fire, and looked up to see smoke coming out of the forest. I do _not_ know how a fire could get started in the rain, but I was in so much pain I barely had time to think about that.

Jasper and Alice soon returned.

"Whoa, Alice, you didn't say she was bleeding so much!" Jasper said.

"I know, I was worrying about that too." Alice picked me up and we started running.

"Where…where…are we…going?" I asked. The fire was spreading. Fast.

"We have to get as far away as possible. Five vampires saw the fire and are coming to see. I don't get a seriously bad sense from them, but one of them I can see poses a threat to you. You're bleeding – a lot – so I'm not surprised. You're doing very well, Jasper, by the way. I can see you won't hurt her, just keep a little more to the left. Anyway, it's a chance they might be connected to James. Even if they aren't, if we stayed there I saw you dead. And that can _not_ happen." Alice said.

"Then…then…then…what's happening now?" I asked. It sure _felt_ like I was dying.

Alice laughed. "Well, I can't say I remember _exactly_ but I'm fairly certain you're transforming into a vampire. There's nothing we can do about it now, sorry. The venom's spread too far. But in three days I think, there won't be anymore pain."

No more pain. Wouldn't _that_ be nice right about now.


	18. New Scents

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

Chapter 16: New Scents

Song: Move Along by All American Rejects

Go ahead as you waste your days with thinking

When you fall everyone sins

Another day and you've had your fill of sinking

With the life held in your

Hands are shaking cold

These hands are meant to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong

Move along, move along like I know you do

And even when your hope is gone

Move along, move along just to make it through

Move along

Move along

So a day when you've lost yourself completely

Could be a night when your life ends

Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving

All the pain held in your

Hands are shaking cold

Your hands are mine to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong

Move along, move along like I know you do

And even when your hope is gone

Move along, move along just to make it through

Move along

(Go on, go on, go on, go on)

When everything is wrong we move along

(Go on, go on, go on, go on)

When everything is wrong, we move along

Along, along, along

When all you got to keep is strong

Move along, move along like I know you do

And even when your hope is gone

Move along, move along just to make it through

[x3]

(Move along)

(Go on, go on, go on, go on)

Right back what is wrong

We move along

Edward's POV

We were all getting ready for the move. The move away from Bella. I knew that's one of the only reasons we were leaving. We couldn't afford (and neither could Bella) if she visited our house one day, not knowing, and I accidentally killed her! I'd have to kill myself if I did that. And I don't even know how to do that! Emmett was saying there was only one way to kill vampires: rip them apart and burn the pieces. Of course I couldn't exactly do that myself, and none of the Cullen's would kill me.

So we were moving so none of that happened. Rosalie was working on Emmett's new Jeep to make it go as fast as Carlisle's Mercedes and Rosalie's BMW. Carlisle and Esme were packing everything and we'd pack them into the huge U-Haul truck we rented. I was thinking about Bella. Then again, I was always thinking about Bella. Always thinking how much I wanted to see her again. But I knew I couldn't.

"Hey, Edward! If you want your piano then you gotta help me carry it into the U-Haul truck." Emmett said from the other room. I got up to help him.

"You know you're quite capable of carrying this by yourself." I said, lifting my side of the grand piano as Emmett laughed.

"Yeah, but I'd probably accidentally crash it into a wall."

"Accidentally, huh?" I asked. He laughed again.

We carried the piano out to the U-Haul and packed everything into the truck that Carlisle and Esme brought out.

About halfway through the packing, I looked up and saw smoke.

"Hey…guys…?" I asked, dropping the box I had.

"Come on Edward, I know you don't want to leave but we gotta be all packed by sunrise. We have to leave right after we say good-bye to Bella. It's just too dangerous if we stay longer." Emmett said.

"No, it's not that." I said, taking a step forward, towards where the smoke was coming from.

"What is it?" Esme asked.

"Do you guys…see that?" I asked, taking another step forward.

They all looked towards where I was looking. I heard them all gasp.

"It's a fire." Emmett said.

"It's a burning vampire." Carlisle said.

"What?!" Emmett exclaimed. "There's another vampire here?!"

"At least two. One of them must have killed the other." Carlisle said.

"It's coming from Forks." Esme said.

"Emmett, get Rosalie from the garage. We have to check this out." Carlisle said, and Emmett rushed off.

"What about Edward?" Esme asked Carlisle.

"We should all stick together. If a vampire is bent on killing all the other vampires in the area we'll be safer in numbers." Carlisle said.

"What's going on?" Rosalie asked, running up Emmett right behind.

Without answering, we all started running towards the smoke. We could start smelling it already.

"Guys? What's that smell?" Rosalie asked.

"A vampire." Esme said.

The smell brought us to a cemetery forest. We caught sight of the fire. There was nothing we could do for that vampire now. We did, however, smell _two_ more vampires. Theirs scents led us to a grave. _My_ grave.

"Oh no." Esme said. She was ahead of me, kneeling at the grave.

As I for closer, I smelled something other than the now-dead vampire.

Blood. But this was no animal blood. This was the most heavenly, intoxicating blood I'd ever smelled. I went crazy. I ran over to a puddle of the blood and lapped **(love that word)** it up.

"Edward?" Emmett asked. I turned and roared at him.

"He's drinking the blood!" Rosalie said.

I dived for another shallow puddle. I was thankful there was so much blood!

"Edward!" Emmett and Carlisle ran over and held me back from the blood. Emmett pinned me down on the ground. I roared and tried and tried to throw him off of me but couldn't get a good blow. I might have been stronger than him, but he was a much more experienced fighter. He knew where all my weak points were so I couldn't get up. I roared at him again.

Rosalie bent down and slapped me.

"We _don't_ drink human blood. Even if it's not _in_ the human." She said. I roared again. This was my pure animalistic side. I forgot all about everything else and focused all my attention on the blood. Oh, how I wanted that blood!

"Carlisle, I know this smell." Esme said, still kneeling at one of the puddles. She looked at Carlisle. "It's Bella's." She said.

That got me to stop fighting Emmett.

Bella's?

I was drinking _Bella's_ blood?

Shear horror spread over my face.

"Yeah, moral's kinda get in the way when you put blood with a face, huh?" Rosalie snarled.

"Hush, Rosalie. This just wasn't any normal newborn reaction. This was different. I believe Bella's blood smells different to Edward than to the rest of us. Bella was Edward's la tua cantante." Carlisle said.

"La tua cantante? What's that?" Emmett asked.

_Bella was Edward's la tua cantante._

"That's a singer." Rosalie said.

_Bella was Edward's…_

"What's that mean? Bella has no singing voice, I can tell you that…" Emmett said.

_Bella was Edward's…_

"Shut up, Emmett." Rosalie said.

"It's a phrase I learned while in Italy. It means Bella's blood sang to Edward. It drew him in. Like a siren. He _has_ to drink it when he smells it, it's almost impossible not to." Carlisle said.

_Bella _was_ Edward's la tua cantante._

"Carlisle?" I said so softly, I could barely hear it.

"Yes, Edward?" He responded.

" 'Bella _was_ Edward's la tua cantante'?" I asked.

It was silent. Their minds were even quiet. I heard it in his thoughts before he said it, though.

"Bella's dead, Edward." Carlisle said quietly.

It was silent again.

"How do you know?" I whispered.

"Look at all the blood. And I can't imagine that a vegetarian vampire found her. The odds are just too slim. We only know of one other group of non-human drinking vampires." Carlisle said.

"Why would the two vampires take her, then?" I asked.

"They probably smelled us coming and wanted to make sure no one else intervened with their…meal."

"Why would they kill that other vampire?" I asked.

"Human drinking vampires can't form bonds (unless they're mates) as well as we can. The other two probably got tired of him and a fight ensued. This leads me to believe the other two are mates."

"It doesn't matter. I'm going after Bella." I said and took off, following the two vampire's scents. Every once and a while I'd get a whiff of Bella's blood on the leaves, trees, and forest floor. She sure was bleeding a lot.

"Edward! Stop! If Bella's kidnappers haven't killed her yet or she hasn't bled to death, _you'll_ kill her!" I couldn't tell who had said it, but they were all behind me. Luckily I was much faster than them.

"I will _not_ kill her!" I roared.

"You attacked just a drop of her blood, Edward! She's going to be _covered_ in blood! You won't be able to help it!" This time I recognized the voice as Rosalie's.

I roared at her without turning around.

They stopped arguing with me. Probably because they knew I wouldn't listen to anything they said, but also though she was dead by now anyway.

Their scents were hard to follow because it was raining, but once we were off the peninsula it stopped and their scents were clearer. We were right behind them, maybe only a few miles. They might not have even realized we were chasing the, yet. We were too far away for me to hear their thoughts though.

Somewhere in mid-California, Emmett caught up to me. They were all still running.

"Edward, the sun's coming up soon and we can't be in the south with the sun up." He said.

"Why not? I've seen you in the daytime before, you don't burst into flames." I said.

"No, we don't die…we…sparkle."

I snorted. "Sparkle?! Are you kidding me?" I asked.

"No. And it makes it very hard for us to travel in the day time in places like this." Emmett said.

"It doesn't matter. I won't stop until I know Bella's safe." I said.

"Edward, she's dead, and I know you know it."

"She is not." I said.

"Who's scent are you following? Hers or theirs?"

I hesitated.

"Theirs."

"And why do you think that is?"

"Her blood stopped dripping."

"Wouldn't that mean she ran out of blood?"

"I suppose so."

"Human's can't live without blood. She's either dead because she bled to death, or the vampires sucked her dry. Either way, she's out of blood and she's dead."

I didn't have the strength to roar at him. I knew he was right. Either way she couldn't possibly be alive. I slowed down and stopped, everyone along with me. I collapsed on the ground. I wasn't tired, at least not physically, but everything seemed to be crashing around on me, forcing me down. I laid on my back and pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. We're all sorry. Bella was like part of the family. We loved her too." Esme said quietly.

No one said anything. They eventually all sat down. The sun came up, and eventually went down again. We didn't move. I didn't know where they learned all this patience, but I vastly appreciated it. I had to think.

"Edward?" Emmett asked. I nodded, answering the question in his mind. I suppose I _was_ ready to go back to Forks. We all got up and started the long run back to our house. We were still moving, even though Bella was no longer here. We would just wait until after her funeral. Which I couldn't go to because I was supposed to be dead.

"When will the human's notice her absence?" Rosalie asked, walking into the front door.

"Charlie, her father, is the Chief of police. He'll notice immediately. But he knows that they can't do anything about it for a few days." Carlisle said.

"He'll be crushed. He may not have shown it a lot, but I could tell he loved Bella more than anything in the world. We have to be here for him." Esme said.

"I suppose now that Bella is…gone…we can stay a little bit longer. For Charlie." Carlisle said.

I sighed. Bella was gone. I could never return and ask her to take me back when I was able to handle it. Never. I would _never_ see her again.


	19. Alice and Jasper

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: I'm not that happiest with this...but I don't know how to make it better. Hopefully y'all like it.  
**

Chapter 17: Alice and Jasper

Song: Empty Room by Marjorie Fair

I'm so tired of learning to talk

Building fences on the wall

In this state, I shall not remain

I don't want to go, but if I die young

Fill my empty room with the sun

Fill my empty room with the sun

This doesn't matter like it did before

This doesn't matter much anymore

Change my mind or help me to try

I'm afraid and I'm not satisfied

In this state I shall not remain

I don't want to go, but if I die young

Fill my empty room with the sun

Fill my empty room with the sun

This doesn't matter like it did before

This doesn't matter much anymore

This doesn't matter like it did before

This doesn't matter much anymore

Daylight is not the same

When you're stabbing at the stars

In your eyes, and bleeding

Is what you see

This doesn't matter like it did before

This doesn't matter much anymore

This doesn't matter like it did before

This doesn't matter much anymore

This doesn't matter much anymore

Alice's POV

Bella was thrashing around like crazy but managed to keep from screaming, which I was grateful for. It helped me think.

"Ok, Jasper, where do we go?" I asked. We were still running, south, I believed.

"Those other vampires could follow us, we just have to stay ahead of them." He said.

"They're going to chase us but they're not going to catch us. I know that if we keep running until morning." I said. "Now we just have to know where we keep running _to_."

"Did you get any faces?" Jasper asked.

"I know there are five. Three males, two females. But one of the males was the most important: I saw him crystal clear, but the rest blurred so I wouldn't be able to recognize them if we met them. But this male, he was immensely important. He was the one that would've killed Bella if we would've stayed. And for some reason, that made it so much more horrible; that _he_ would've killed her. If one of the others was going to kill her it would be a little different." I said.

"What do you mean?" Jasper asked.

"I don't know…I get a sense of…dark irony…because it's him."

"Um. Irony?"

"Yeah, I don't know. But it's there, the irony would be there." I shrugged.

"Does that make a difference? Is that important? The irony?" Jasper asked.

"Yes. It makes a difference. I don't know how or why, but it does."

"Did you get this ironic vampires name?" Jasper asked.

I sighed. "No."

It was silent. We were still running south.

"Where are we going, exactly?" Jasper asked.

"The vampires behind us won't go south. At least not all the way. So that's where we go. The real question right now is where should we stay while Bella's changing? I'd want a hotel room, to make her as comfortable as possible, but humans might as questions. She wouldn't be able to scream. And I can see how much she wants to. If that's the case, we might just have to find a forest somewhere and she can change there. It won't be comfortable at all."

"I don't think comfort will make a difference. She won't really be able to feel it once the pain is everywhere. I think she'd rather scream." Jasper said.

"Bella? Bella? Can you hear me?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Can you handle not screaming at all? Or would you rather scream?" I asked. I'd let her decide.

She let out a blood-curdling scream that lasted much longer than I would've expected her to have air for.

"Alright. The forest it is." I said.

We changed our direction a little but kept running. We were in the forests of southern California by sunrise.

"Jasper? Can you get as many leaves as you can and try to make a sort of bed for Bella?" I asked. I didn't want to put Bella down on the hard ground.

After her makeshift bed was done, I set her down.

"I still don't like her being just in a pile of wet leaves. Think of all the mud! And her pretty black dress is gunna be ruined! Ooh and look at those boots! Ok, I'm taking those off her so she can wear them when she's a vampire because those are pretty!"

Jasper laughed at me.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Bella screamed her little heart out all day and all the next night. The day after, nearing sundown, I got a vision.

"Jasper." I called him over.

"Yes?" He asked, sitting down next to me.

"When she's done, she's not going to remember anything. Not her name, age, where she's from, how she got here. Nothing." I said.

"Like you?" He asked.

"Yeah. Just like me."

"Does she still remember now?"

"Yeah, she remembers now."

"Let's ask her about it so we can tell her when she doesn't remember." Jasper said.

"Yeah!" I lept up and jumped over to Bella. "Bella? Can you hear me?"

She nodded (painfully, it looked like).

"Can you talk?"

"Y-yeah."

"Can you answer some questions for us?"

"Y-yeah."

"What's your full name?"

"I-Isabella…Marie…Swan."

"Nice to meet you, Isabella Marie Swan. You prefer Bella, don't you?"

She nodded.

"How old are you?"

"Eighteen."

"When's your birthday?"

"S-September…th-th-thirteenth."

"Oh, so you just turned eighteen. Where are you from?"

"A-Arizona. Lived…with…mom."

"What's your mom's name?"

"R-Renee D-Dywer."

"Why were you in Forks, Washington?"

"Moved…at…sixteen."

"Why?"

"To…live…with Charlie."

"Charlie Swan? Is he your father?"

She nodded.

"We found you at the cemetery. Was there a death recently?"

She nodded.

"When?"

"I…I…think…a…few days ago."

"Who was it?"

"I…I…I don't remember."

Oh no. Her memory was starting to go.

"Think _really_ hard, Bella. Who's grave was that?"

"I…don't remember. But…I know…they were significant."

"Was is Charlie?"

She shook her head. At least she knew who it _wasn't_.

"Was it a relative? Like an uncle or aunt?"

She shook her head.

"Does it really matter who it was, Alice? Maybe that's something she'd want to forget." Jasper suggested.

"No. It's important. I can feel it." I hated when I only got 'feelings' and not full visions. They made things murky and I didn't like it. **(I actually don't know if that ever happened to Alice in the series or if that's even possible...but whatever. Not a lot in this story is very possible) **"Was it a friend from school?" I asked Bella.

She paused. "Maybe."

"A boyfriend?"

This question seemed to cause her pain.

So she lost a boyfriend.

"Were you in love?"

She screamed. It wasn't like the screams of pain from the venom. This was a scream of emotional pain. I could hear Jasper's screams behind me. He was feeling her pain. _Sorry, honey. I have to get this information._

"What was his name?"

She screamed louder. So did Jasper.

"I know you don't want to, but you have to remember! Bella! _What was his name?_" I yelled over her.

She screamed even louder. My goodness, how much louder could she _get_?

"Alice! Stop! She can't! _We_ can't!" Jasper grabbed my shoulders and turned me to face him.

I sighed. "I know." I hung my head. She stopped screaming. "I'm sorry Jasper. I know this is crucial! I need this information." I sighed again. "And I can't get it." He pulled me into a hug.

* * *

Another day and night passed. It's been three days.

Bella rolled over. Jasper and I rushed over.

"Is it done?" I asked Jasper.

"Yes. She's changed."

"Bella? Do you recognize me?"

She slowly sat up and shook her head.

"Oh my goodness! _Please_ tell me you remember how to talk!"

She laughed. "Of course! How could someone forget?" She asked.

I sighed in relief.

"But…that's all I remember." She said.

"That's okay. We expected this. Repeat after me." She nodded. "Your name is Bella Swan."

"My name is Bella Swan."

"You're eighteen years old."

"I'm eighteen years old."

It went like that until we had gone over every piece of information she had told me.

Except about her true love dying.

"We found you in a cemetery."

"A cemetery? What was I doing there?"

I hesitated. Should I tell her the truth? Would she really want to know? I thought about the vision I had of her, the painful vision. I had felt all her pain, even the emotional – especially the emotional. She felt dead inside, like there was no reason for anything. Then I thought back to when I had tried to get her to tell me his name. Her emotional pain was so strong, Jasper even cried out in pain. No. Bella wouldn't want to remember. At least, not right now.

"We're not sure. You refused to talk about it. At that point though, you could've been in so much pain that you _couldn't_ answer. For all we know, you could have just had a funeral for your recently deceased hamster."

She nodded.

"But we can finish talking after we hunt." I said, getting up.

"Hunt? Hunt what?" Bella asked.

"Oh. You're a vampire. Most vampires hunt humans, but we think that's wrong. So we hunt animals." I said.

"Okay..." She got up and we made our way around the forest for Bella's first meal.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, those last few lines kinda pooped themselves into the story, but we all know about vampires, do you really want to read all about it again? Yeah, I didn't think so. Don't hate me (or the chapter) for those awful awful lines. You can hate the chapter for other reasons, just not those. I know their craptacular. You don't have to tell me.  
**

**And I laughed when I re-read Alice questioning Bella about her life. I was like "Why did I make Bella a stutterer??" Then I remembered: "Duh, she's in immeasurable pain! She's not gunna be able to talk normally!" So. In case y'all were wondering (just like I was), that's why Bella's talking funny. Except I'm sure you guys are not as slow as me so you probably already figured that out. **

**Oh, hey, has anyone else seen the dolls their making of Bella and Edward??? I'll put the link on my profile. I laughed when I saw them. Not because they look bad (they're really good actually) but they're wearing what they wear in the movie and I can totally see a 10 year old or something buying them and making them make out. Haha. Only problem: they're $140. Yeah. I was like "WTF???" Also notice on the homepage, the poster of Twilight? That's the dolls! It may be obvious to some people but someone had to actually point that out to me...haha. Click on the poster icon thing to see the dolls.  
**

**~Emmy**


	20. V is for Victoria

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: I wish I could've shown just how angry Victoria really is, but I've never actually been **_**that**_** angry…I'm not exactly an angry person (most of the time) so I don't really know how to express that. But if you listen to the song while reading, it might help you get angry or something so you can feel what I really wanted Victoria to feel. So have fun with that.**

Chapter 18: V is for Victoria

Song: Animal I Have Become by Three Days Grace

I can't escape this hell

So many times I've tried

But I'm still caged inside

Somebody get me through this nightmare

I can't control myself

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?

No one will ever change this animal I have become

Help me believe it's not the real me

Somebody help me tame this animal

(This animal, this animal)

I can't escape myself

(I can't escape myself)

So many times I've lied

(So many times I've lied)

But there's still rage inside

Somebody get me through this nightmare

I can't control myself

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?

No one will ever change this animal I have become

Help me believe it's not the real me

Somebody help me tame this animal I have become

Help me believe it's not the real me

Somebody help me tame this animal

Somebody help me through this nightmare

I can't control myself

Somebody wake me from this nightmare

I can't escape this hell

(This animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal)

So what if you can see the darkest side of me?

No one will ever change this animal I have become

Help me believe it's not the real me

Somebody help me tame this animal I have become

Help me believe it's not the real me

Somebody help me tame this animal

(This animal I have become)

Victoria's POV

Three days. James has been gone for three days. I can only assume he's on a tracking mission, and I'd want to go find him, but I would just interrupt him and he wouldn't be happy about that. Plus he told us to stay right _here_.

But it's been three whole days of doing nothing but waiting.

"Victoria, I'm leaving."

I turned my head up sharply to see Laurent standing over me. He reached his arm down to help me stand up.

"You can't leave." I said. "James told us to wait here."

"But James has been gone three times longer than he said he'd be. I don't think he's coming back."

"What are you trying to say? I'm his mate, of course he'll come back! He can't just leave me!"

"No, Victoria, he's dead."

I growled at him. "He is _not_ dead."

"Yes. He is."

"And how are you so certain? It's taken longer than this on some tracking missions before!"

"Okay how long was the longest?"

"A month." I said, thinking back through all the tracking trips.

"So are you going to wait around for a month for him to come back?"

"If it takes that long, yes."

"And what happens when he doesn't come back in a month?"

"I'll wait longer."

"And how long will you wait before you realize he's not coming back?"

"He'll come back, so it's not a problem."

Laurent shook his head. "Well I'm leaving. I'll be heading up to Alaska if you decide it's not worth waiting around for."

"Not going to happen." I said, but he had already run off. "No. I know he's coming back."

* * *

Ok. He's not coming back. It's only been four days, not a month, but I have the feeling that he's gone.

Well, then I'll go look for him.

I ran in the direction of his scent. It hadn't rained since he left, so I could still find places where his scent was strong. It was a little more difficult because it _had_ been raining when he left, but there were still traces of him.

His scent led me to a small town. He must've gotten hungry.

Then I smelled something that I knew James had smelled too; other vampires. Four scents that were everywhere, but definitely led to one specific place out of town. Two more scents didn't wander.

That's when I caught James' scent again. The two vampires scents were right over his. Were _they_ tracking _him_?

The two scents were the strongest. Five other vampire scents eventually were over the other two. Four I recognized, one I hadn't smelled before. I followed the scents, which led to a cemetery. I kept following them until I got to a fresh grave. Here I smelled (and saw) human blood. So James _did_ get his snack…

One of the scents were stronger here, probably meaning this vampire sat here for a little longer than the others or James. The fifth scent also was very strong here, but I could tell the two were not here at the same time.

I kept following the other vampires' scents until all three (James, and the two others) of them were very strong in one concentrated spot.

That's when I saw the remains of a fire. I raced over to it. James' scent was so strong it clung in the air. The five other vampire scents were here too, but by the strength of it, they didn't stay longer. The other two vampires scents, however, were the second strongest after James'.

And I knew why James' scent was so strong. He was dead.

I roared as loud as I could. _They killed James. They killed my mate. My true love. _

This was simply unacceptable. I was going to find the bastards that did this and rip them apart slowly, so they feel the pain. They will suffer like they have never suffered before. They will die by my hand. And I will enjoy it.

The two vampires' scent went back to the grave where the human was. The blood was the easiest to follow. One of the vampires must have carried the injured human and ran with it. I could imagine a limp human in a vampire's arms, blood dripping down. There were plenty of blood droplets on the ground and leaves and trees for me to follow easily. If I found this human, I'd find the vampires.

As I was running, I was thinking about this insignificant human. James was obviously feasting on the weak creature, when the two vampires killed him. Why would these vampires kill him, though? Did they already have a claim on the territory? No, the four other vampire's scents all across town told me they would have the claim. Did he insult them? Possible, but the vampire's scents were _following_ James, so they must have been planning on killing him before he even knew they were there.

So why did they kill him? What else could be their reason?

Could it be…the human? I'd heard about and seen vampire's strange fetish with humans, but not for food. It was always odd, but it happened. Could that have been what happened? James died because he picked the wrong meal? What special being could this human be if it was to die for? Or to kill for?

Well, if this human was so important to, these two vampires, then they would be devastated if it died.

So the human dies.

I eventually got to the end of the scent in Southern California. The scent was extremely strong in one particular area of the forest. There was a huge pile of leaves where the human's blood was. Mixed with the human's scent was a new vampire's scent. It started on the pile of leaves.

So the weak human was now a newborn vampire. This makes things a little more difficult, but not impossible. Vampires may be harder to kill than human's, but newborns were the easiest to kill of vampires; almost no fighting skills. The only real problem would be the other two vampires. Getting around them might be a little bit harder.

But I wasn't one to decline a challenge. Besides, if things got bad, I knew I could always find a way to escape; almost no risk.

It was decided. A newborn vampire would die soon.

* * *

**A/N: Ok, I'm majorly procrastinating on **_**everything**_** I should be doing right now. I have 3 deadlines that I need to meet tomorrow and I'm doing this instead (so you guys better review and make it worthwhile for me). I'm insanely tired right now, so if my editing isn't that great, don't be hatin'. **

**~Emmy**


	21. Powers

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Ok. **_**Definitely **_**not my best. I honestly thought of just ditching this chapter and making y'all find out through Victoria (because she has the next 2 upcoming chapters). But that might have been mean and maybe confusing. I re-wrote this twice (which is really hard for me to do) but they were both worse! So, I give you my latest craptacular chapter: (I'm fairly certain the next one will be better. Well, it is in my opinion…)**

**~Em**

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* * *

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Chapter 19: Powers

Song: New soul by Yael Naim

I'm a new soul

I came to this strange world

Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take.

But since I came here,

Felt the joy and the fear

Finding myself making every possible mistake

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

I'm a young soul

In this very strange world

Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake

But why all this hate?

Try to communicate

Finding trust and love is not always easy to make

la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la...

This is a happy end

'Cause you don't understand

Everything you have done

Why's everything so wrong?

This is a happy end

Come and give me your hand

I'll take you far away

I'm a new soul

I came to this strange world

Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take.

But since I came here,

Felt the joy and the fear

Finding myself making every possible mistake

I'm a new soul... (la, la, la, la,...)

In this very strange world...

Every possible mistake

Possible mistake

Every possible mistake

Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...

Take take take take take... take a mistake

Take, take a mistake

Take, take a mistake

(oh oh oh oh...)

[fade out]

(oh oh oh oh...)

Bella's POV

I couldn't remember anything about being human, but I knew the whole vampire thing was all new. Alice and Jasper said that keeping up with the 'vegetarian' diet of only drinking anima blood would be hard, especially my first year. Jasper was still having trouble with it.

It wasn't a good feeling not knowing anything about yourself. Sure, I knew my name and everything Alice had told me, but I still felt like something was missing. Like a huge chunk of my life was gone and I couldn't figure out why. I did have more specific questions on my last night being human, though.

"Did one of you bite me?" I asked Alice and Jasper.

"No, we found another vampire trying to eat you." Jasper said.

"Why'd you guys save me? It sounds like that stuff happens all the time." I said.

Alice and Jasper exchanged a quick glance.

"I had a vision about you." Alice said. Alice had previously told me about their powers, her being psychic and Jasper empathetic. "I knew we had to save you. You'd be part of our family." Alice said.

"Who else is going to be in the family? It sounds like there's more." I said.

"Oh yes. I can see several more vampires. We'll be a great big, happy family." Alice grinned.

As we were hunting a few days later (Alice and Jasper said I always had to be well fed) in northern Nevada, something strange happened. We were running, and out of nowhere, my vision changed. I wasn't blind, but it was like I was somewhere else, witnessing something. I saw me attacking two hitchhikers. I stopped running, and so did Alice and Jasper. Suddenly my eyes and vision were back to normal. I saw Alice staring at me.

"Why are you guys so confused? What's going on?" Jasper asked.

"I'd say you're more confused than _we_ are…" I said.

"What?" He and Alice asked at the same time.

"Bella? Did you just read my emotions?" Jasper asked.

"Uh, I don't know. I kind of felt your confusion." I shrugged.

"Wait, no, I saw Bella's face while we were running. Bella was having a vision. The same one I saw a second later, I believe." Alice said. "Bella? Did you see something that wasn't really here?"

"Yeah, I saw me attack two hitchhikers a few miles up the road. That's why I stopped." I said.

"Yes, that's the same vision I had." Alice said.

"Wait, are you telling me I'm psychic _and _empathetic?" I asked.

"No, not exactly. It sounds like you can take other people's powers." Jasper said.

"Whoa! That's cool!" Alice jumped up, excited.

"Well, we should test this a little. See what she can actually do right now." Jasper said.

"Yeah! Ok! First off, how does she take our powers? She wasn't touching either of us."

"You're right. Maybe it's proximity." I said.

"Ok, let's test to see how close someone has to be." Jasper suggested.

"Yeah! Jasper will keep moving farther away until you can't use his power anymore!" Alice said.

Jasper started a yard away from me.

"I'm guessing you can still sense our emotions." Alice said. I nodded.

Jasper moved until he was five yards away.

"I still feel Alice's excitement." I said.

Jasper moved another 5 yards back.

"Just keep moving back until I say stop." I said.

Jasper moved back another 5 yards. And another, and another. When he was about 30 yards away I told him to stop.

"You can't feel my emotions?"

"They're fuzzy."

Jasper moved another 5 yards back."

"All gone!" I called.

Jasper ran back. "So somewhere between 30 and 35 yards, your power to pick up other powers stops working. That's pretty far for something like that." Jasper said.

"Well, that's cool." I said. For some reason, this all seemed normal. I knew it wasn't. I may not remember _me_ or my life, but I remember general things, and I knew having powers wasn't a general thing.

"I wonder if you'll eventually have different visions than me, or if they'll always be the same." Alice pondered.

"Oh, we're going to have to train you on each power. It took me decades for me to know the extent of my powers and completely control them. I'm sure I could still extend and improve them, but you'll at least need to learn control." Jasper said.

"Definitely! Oh, this is going to be so fun!" Alice squealed.

I rolled my eyes but smiled. Alice was just so fun and lighthearted. I knew (and so did she) that we were going to be best friends, like sisters. I didn't need any abilities to tell me that.

* * *

**A/N: I know it's not the power that Stephenie gave Bella, but I thought her little force-field thing was kinda lame. I mean, she's been in the backseat the whole time, through all the books, and all she gets is a defensive power that can only be useful like twice?? I don't think so. If I'm writing her having a power, I'm giving her a cool power. And yes, Edward will not be able to read her mind; I'm not changing that. Be cool, ok?**

**Since none of you have probably never met or heard from Jessica (the other 1/2 of 2hottwilightchicas) before, you also probably don't know her very well. Well, I finally got her to add more to her profile. So if you guys haven't yet, you should go check it out. She doesn't talk much (a review or two) so now you can go 'meet' the mysterious person that I'm sure you're all wondering about. **

**~Emmy**


	22. Bella's 1st Human

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Oh. My. God. You guys are amazing! I open up my email for this account today and I have 25 new emails! 25! That's incredible! That's reviews, but mostly people putting me on their story alerts and that automated stuff. I was grinning ear to ear and you all totally made my day. I just wanted to say thank you, and hope y'all like all the upcoming chapters. :D**

**Oh, and I really wanted to get this up today so I'm not sure good my editing is.  
**

**~Emmy**

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* * *

  
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Chapter 20: Bella's First Human

Song: Bullets by Editors

If something has to change

Then it always does

If something has to change

then it always does

You don't need this disease

Not right now

No you don't need this disease

Not right now

Oh you don't need this this disease

You don't you don't need this disease

[X6]

If something has to give

Then it always will

If something has to give

Then it always will

You don't need this disease

Not right now

No you don't need this disease

Not right now

no no not right now

You don't you don't need this disease

[X7]

You don't

Would you fall down

Would you fall down

Oh you don't need this this disease

You don't you don't need this disease

[X7]

You

Won't

Fall

Down

You don't need this this disease

you don't you don't need this disease

[X7]

You don't.

Victoria's POV

It had been a week since I had found out James had died. A week since I found out who killed him. A week since I swore vengeance on a newborn's head.

I followed the three vampire's scents. I always kept a few miles' distance so I never got a glimpse of them or heard any of their conversations. I needed to learn more about them, but I couldn't get any closer without them discovering me. I just knew them by their scents, nothing more.

If I wanted to kill that newborn, though, I'd have to learn more.

Fortunately, in mid- North Dakota, the wind changed. Huge gusts of wind were blowing south, as we were moving north. This is the change I needed. The wind blew their scents back at me so much, if I didn't know better I'd say they were right next to me. This meant that unless I was an arms length away from them, they'd never know I was there.

I got closer; I was just under a mile away. I could tell they were hunting. If I stayed just south of them, I'd be safe.

It's a good thing they were hunting. They became more animalistic when they were hunting. At first I thought it very strange when I found out they hunted animals. How could they live off of that? Especially the newborn! But it somewhat helped me. They gave up all of themselves to their instincts when they hunted. Us human-drinkers did not. We had to trick humans, play mind games with them. This was good for me, them on all instincts, because they stopped thinking and it would take them longer to detect me.

I crept closer until I was the length of a football field away from them. If I strained, I could hear them talk.

"Alice, come here. There's a bear scent this way." A male voice said. Thanks to the wind, I could place the male voice with a scent. One of the scents changed, moved to where the male's scent was. That must be the female Alice. They were probably mates. I could place those two scents as the ones that did the actually killing of James. So where was the _reason_ for James' death? Where was the newborn? How could I get it away from the other two?

The newborn's scents drifted towards me. Male or female, I couldn't tell yet. _Someone say its name. I need to know its gender so I can set my plan into action._

"Jasper, I get this one. You can have the next bear we come across." I heard the female – Alice – say.

"That's fine." I heard the previously placed male say. So I knew_ their_ two names…

"Aw, that's not fair, Alice. Jasper's the one that found it. He should get it." A female voice said, coming from the newborn's scent.

_Yes! It's female!_ I was about to run off to set my plan into motion, when the other female, Alice, said something that stopped me.

"Bella, what's Jasper feeling? Read his emotions and tell me."

_What? Read_ his emotions? Did the newborn Bella have a _power_? That would very much complicate things.

I could hear Bella sigh softly. "You already know." She said. How did Alice already know? I knew mates had a deep connection, but still! Did this go past that?

"Well, I know what you're going to say, but I don't know if that's what he's really feeling."

Ok, this wasn't just a deep connection, otherwise she _would_ know what he was really feeling. Did Alice have a power too? This could be much harder than I first anticipated.

I heard Bella sigh again. "He doesn't care if you get the bear, he just wants to make you happy."

Alice giggled, them must have run over to Jasper because their scents were now very close together, intermingling a little. She was probably hugging him.  
"See Bella? You even said so yourself, I can have the bear!" Alice said.

"Alice, that's –"

It was silent for a minute.

"Ooooh! Alice! Thank you! You know I haven't had bear in awhile!" Bella squealed.

My first thought was "Ew. Bear. Who would want that?" My second thought was "Did they just have a silent conversation, or was my hearing going?"

"What?" Jasper asked. Okay, so my hearing wasn't going, and they probably didn't have a silent conversation. Otherwise, Jasper might have picked up on something. _What_ was going on?

"Alice is sharing the bear! We all get some!" Bella said.

"Oh, that's so nice of you Alice." I could hear the smile in Jasper's voice. It sickened me that they could go on loving each other, even though they stole my love away. Maybe after the newborn's dead I'll kill them too.

But how did Bella know Alice had decided that? It sounds like she was using a power, a power that sounded a lot like Alice's. Were they both…psychic? But Bella couldn't have _two_ powers, could she? She read Jasper's emotions, wouldn't that make her empathetic? And what were the odds that there would be two psychics in one place, in one coven? Could Alice…share her power? I had to find out what Jasper's power was. If Jasper was empathetic too, that can only mean that Bella's power was to use other vampire's powers.

I got my answer a few weeks later. We were in Manitoba, Canada. I'd been getting lazy about following them, making simple mistakes. This time, I got a little closer than I probably should have. I was lucky though, this weird little coven was in the middle of a crises and didn't even notice me.

I got about 40-50 yards away, the wind in my favor. I was close enough to see and hear what was going on.

As I got close enough to see, I saw Bella on the ground, Jasper holding her down. She was thrashing around like crazy, trying to shake him off.

"Alice! She's too strong! Help me hold her down!" Jasper cried. I looked over to where Alice was. She was treating wounds to a human boy who was lying down next to a stroller.

Alice leapt up and went to help Jasper.

"But what about the boy?" Alice asked.

"She bit him. Either we suck him dry or he changes. The venom has spread to much for us to do anything." Jasper said.

Bella roared. "I want him! He's mine!"

"Shhh, shhh, Bella. No, we are not going to let you eat him. We are ethical vampires, remember? Killing people is _wrong_!" Alice said.

Bella roared again.

"Jasper, can you calm her any more?" Alice asked.

"I'm giving out enough calm to make an elephant pass out! I don't know how she's still like this!"

"I know honey, I don't know either. Do you have any more calm left? Just to up the ante a little?"

"I'll try."

A few seconds later _I_ started to feel calm. So Jasper was an empathetic too…that could only mean Bella could take other powers! This might be a bit of a problem. I'd studied these three vampires for weeks now. I understood Alice's power quite well. That means, for my plan to work, I need to find a gifted vampire that can get around those visions.

With Jasper's last blast of calmness, Bella finally relaxed and stopped thrashing.

Alice got up and ran over to the boy on the ground. "Jasper, he's changing." Alice said.

"I suppose we have to let the venom spread. We can't exactly eat him…?" Jasper turned it into a question.

"No. We can _not_ eat him." Alice said.

"What do we do with him when he's done changing? Set him loose on the world? Did we just create another serial killer the humans will never catch?" Jasper asked.

Alice sighed. "I'm not sure. And you know I hate saying that. I'm trying to look into his future, but it looks like a decision hasn't been made yet. I can see there is a chance he'll stay with us, though."

"Well I suppose –"

"OH MY GOSH! Jasper, I just saw a flicker of love in his future!" Alice cried.

"Wells, that's great Alice, but is that any of our business?" Jasper asked.

"Yes, it is! He's going to fall in love with _Bella_!" Alice jumped up and down, giddy. "Oh my goodness this is so amazing! I didn't think she'd find her mate so fast!"

Jasper chuckled. "I'm glad you're so concerned about other people's personal love lives, but what are we going to do with this baby?" Jasper pointed to the stroller. I could hear a faint heartbeat from inside. It was slow and rhythmic, probably meaning the baby inside was asleep.

"Oh…well…I don't suppose we could keep it…?"

Jasper shook his head.

"Then I guess there's nothing to do besides find it's home. This boy must have just been on a walk with it, it has to live nearby." Alice said.

"Alice?" Bella asked, sitting up.

"Uh oh. Do you need more of Jasper's calm? Please don't try to eat the human." Alice said.

"No, no, I can't even smell him much anymore. His smell is becoming less and less strong and inviting."

"Yes, he's changing."

Bella slowly made her way over to the human, Jasper keeping his eyes locked on her in case he needed to hold her down again.

"Hello?" She hesitantly asked the human.

It looked up at her painfully.

"I know how much it hurts. I was going through that just over a month ago. I'm very sorry I did this to you. You won't get a chance to see your baby sister again, so you should say goodbye to her before Alice takes her back home." Bella said.

The boy nodded, and Alice reached down and gave the baby to the human on the ground.

"Good bye Charlotte. Tell Mom I love her." The boy whispered. He hugged her, then handed her back to Alice.

"We live on the main road about a half-mile out of the forest that way." The boy said, pointing east. "It's the big yellow house. You can't miss it." The boy said. Alice nodded, and ran away with her baby.

"How old are you?" Bella asked.

"Sixteen."

"What's your name?"

"Riley."

* * *

**A/N: Ok, the next few chapters might jump around times a lot. Like it'll fast forward days, weeks, years, in just a sentence. I honestly hate when authors do that, but I'm a huge hypocrite. So, if it says 10 years later, that's not a typo, it really is 10 years later. (that's just an example, I'm not sure if I'll just skip over 10 years…I might though, so be prepared.) **

**LOVE YOU ALL!**

**~Emmy  
**


	23. Not Love Usefulness

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: You guys continue to amaze me! I didn't count this time, but it was about another 25-30 emails of reviews and story alert subscriptions, etc. I was like "WHOA!" I even went and told Jessica because I was so happy. Seriously, guys. Keep it up. Maybe I'll get over 100 reviews with this chapter…? (That's only 2 more reviews. I have faith in you guys to give me at least 2 reviews!)**

**Oh, also, if you haven't already noticed, I swear sometimes. Sometimes it's needed and adds to the tone of the chapter and what the character is trying to say, so hopefully it doesn't bother everyone. If you don't like it…then…uhhh…hmmm…replace the words or something in your mind, I don't know. I try not to swear often (I usually have to edit them out) but when they are needed or add to the story, they will be here. I'm not afraid to use the word 'fuck'. So I hope I don't offend everyone, that's not my intention. **

**~Em**

Chapter 21: Not Love – Usefulness

Song: Girl by The Beatles (Victoria chapters are hard ones to pick songs for, but for this one Victoria is the girl, Riley's the one 'singing' (yet…he doesn't really know it…)

Is there anybody going to listen to my story

All about the girl who came to stay?

She's the kind of girl you want so much

It makes you sorry

Still, you don't regret a single day

Ah girl

Girl

When I think of all the times I've tried so hard to leave her

She will turn to me and start to cry

And she promises the earth to me

And I believe her

After all this times I don't know why

Ah, girl

Girl

She's the kind of girl who puts you down

When friends are there, you feel a fool

When you say she's looking good

She acts as if it's understood

She's cool, cool, cool, cool

Girl

Girl

Was she told when she was young that pain

Would lead to pleasure?

Did she understand it when they said

That a man must break his back to earn

His day of leisure?

Will she still believe it when he's dead?

Ah girl

Girl

Girl

Ah girl

Girl

Girl

Victoria's POV

They waited the three days until Riley was changed. I had to move back so they wouldn't know I was there. Riley would work. He may not have a power, but I knew I could plan very carefully where I'd get around Alice's visions anyway. Powers would have been useful though…

When Alice had a vision of Riley becoming Bella's mate, that wasn't love. That was me. That was my plan. I would somehow get Riley alone and convince him to do what I say. I'd make him fall in love with me. Riley had to feel love for this to work, only because there were two empathetics in that damned coven. They just had to know that he felt it; they had no way to know why or for whom. I just prayed Riley was a good actor. Then I'd tell him to get Bella to fall in love with him. She'd be wrapped around his finger while he was wrapped around mine. Then I'd just have to wait until the time was right, maybe when they were hunting one day, and Riley would lure her away. Then I'd kill her, and sweet justice will be mine. This was all decided the minute they said they were going to let him change.

The first problem was getting Riley alone. I couldn't talk to Riley while he was changing; they hovered over him like flies to honey. I couldn't do it on his first hunt; they stuck to him like glue to make sure he didn't kill anybody.

They first week of his vampirism was non successful. They wouldn't let him out of their sight. I often got close enough to see Alice's impatience towards Riley and his feelings. He paid no attention to Bella at all. She barely paid attention to him too, except to keep apologizing for trying to eat him. He even seemed to hold a grudge against her for that, even though he said he forgave her. He only looked at her with contempt; never love as Alice had hoped for. Not even mild romantic interest. Nor would he, ever. At least, not until I got to him.

Riley always seemed annoyed with his coven. Even after just one week, he seemed to have cabin fever. He probably didn't like them hovering so much.

"Guys, can I hunt alone for once? I promise not to eat anyone." He said as Alice was practically on his back.

"But you never know, you don't have that kind of control yet." Jasper said.

"There is – literally – no one around for miles and miles! We're in the forests of no where!" Riley threw his arms up in frustration.

"But you don't know –"

"I'm hunting alone. You will now follow me." He said.

"You are hunting alone. We will not follow you." All three said at the same time, in hypnotized voices.

I saw Riley look taken aback, but seized his chance and ran off.

All three just stood there, frozen.

This is my one opportunity! What I've been waiting for!

I ran after Riley, soon catching up to him.

"Stop!" I called. We were about a mile away from the still-frozen coven.

Riley turned sharply. "I told you guys not to –" He stopped abruptly when he saw me. His eyes roamed over me, seeming to drink in everything he saw. His eyes stopped at my face and seemed to glaze over. This would be easier than I though. "H-h-hi." He stuttered. Funny, I didn't place him a nervous stutterer.

"I'm Victoria." I sauntered up to him.

"R-R-Riley."

"Oh, I know." I licked my lips. I saw him shutter.

"H-hi."

"Hello." I took a few steps closer. "I've been watching you."

"M-me?" He pointed to himself awkwardly.

"Yes, you." I reached up and tailed my finger across his lower lip. He trembled beneath my touch. I gave a small smile. This was too easy. "I've kept my eye on you quite closely, and I know you're not happy with your coven." He shook his head in agreement. "But me. I could make you happy, Riley. I could make you very happy." I grabbed his two front belt loops on his jeans and yanked him forward until we were hip-to-hip, chest-to-chest. I bent my head down (for I was slightly taller than him) and grazed my lips against his, barely touching. "Would you like to do something for me, Riley? A favor between…lovers?" I whispered.

"Anything." He whispered back. I leant all the way in and smashed my lips against his, tangling my hands in his hair. He slid his tongue in, and I went along with it. If this is what it took to get my revenge, this is what I'd do.

After a few minutes, I pulled back. He was getting way too…excited.

"I need you to fall in love with Bella." I said.

"What?! No! That little bitch that killed me? That took my life away? That took me from everything I loved? I don't think so. I could never love her!"

I sighed.

"B-besides. I thin I'm in love with you." He said.

"I know." I winked and licked my lips again. He started trembling again. "I just need you to _pretend_ to fall in love with her." I said.

"Why? I was just leaving that coven now. I never want to see them again."

"I know. But I'm seeking revenge. And you can help me get it." I said.

"Revenge? What'd they do?"

"They killed…a friend of mine. Someone from my old coven. It was that bitch Bella's fault." I said. Riley started growling.

"I'll kill her!" He roared.

"Yes, hun, that's the point. That's why I need your help."

"Ok, yeah, let's go kill them!" Riley started marching back in the direction they were.

"No, no, Riley. We can't get them now. It's two against three. We wouldn't win. We have to buy our time." I stopped him.

"But, what was that about me falling in love with Bella? Why would I have to do that?"

"You just have to pretend. Make her fall in love with you. When you have gained her trust, lure her away and we'll kill her together. But make sure to not do it without me. I have to have the satisfaction of doing it." I said.

He nodded. "I can do that."

I grinned and kissed him again.

"When will I see you again?" He asked.

"The next time you stop to hunt. Maybe once a week. Just do what you did today."

"But what _did_ I do today? They all just froze, I didn't understand it."

"I don't know exactly how it works, I just know what I saw. You gave a command and they followed it."

"I can control people?" He asked.

I grinned. "This makes things much easier for us."

"I wonder if I can control everything; actions, thoughts, emotions. I heard Jasper giving Bella tips on controlling her power, maybe he can tell me something about mine."

"NO!" I roared. "Do _not_ tell them you have a power! If they know, they'll use it and turn it against us!"

"O-ok. I won't tell. I'll make sure they don't find out."

"Good." I said.

"But to do that, shouldn't I understand it more? Know what my limitations are?"

"Hmm. Give me different commands and we'll see if I do them." I said. He nodded.

"Kiss me." He commanded. Suddenly I lost control. My will was not my own. I bent down and kissed him. "Cool." He smiled. I rolled my eyes. "Forget that you kissed me under my control." He commanded.

"Ok, give me some commands already! I haven't done anything yet!" I said. Maybe Riley couldn't follow _my_ commands very easily.

"I just did." He smiled.

"Don't you lie to me." I growled.

"No, no. I told you to kiss me, and then you did. I told you to forget that you kissed, and you did! It's working!" He beamed.

"Oh." I said, shocked. I grinned an evil grin. This was too perfect. This would be so easy!

"Ok. Be sad." He commanded.

Nothing. I wasn't sad at all.

"You can't control my emotions." I said.

"Huh. I can control your actions and thoughts though." He said.

"This is the best! This is how we'll get around Alice!" I said. He looked at me, confused.

"Alice is a psychic. She sees things once a decision is made. If we _plan_ to meet once a week, she'll always get a vision of us meeting. Now, you just have to get her alone (so Jasper and Bella don't hear) and tell her to not have any visions of me and then tell her to forget that you asked, but keep the first order in place. That way, if I'm with you, she won't see you, and she won't see us meeting. It's perfect!" I said.

"What about Jasper? Won't he know I don't love Bella, even if I get her to love me?" He asked.

"You love me, right?" He nodded vigorously. "Then it's not a problem. He can't trace who the love is for. As long as you love me, he'll think you love her. _Especially_ if you act like it."

He nodded, but seemed hesitant about something. "How do I pretend I love her if the very sight of her repulses me?" He asked.

I thought about this for a minute. "Imagine me instead of her. Picture my face instead of hers. Pretend you're kissing me, not here. Your reward is me, once a week."

Riley grinned. "I'll take that." He leaned in for another kiss.

He was no James, but he was the key to my revenge for James. This had better work.


	24. SNL

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song or Saturday Night Live.**

**A/N: Alrighty, this chapter has many many many many many Saturday Night Live quotes in it. I honestly don't know if SNL shows in other countries (I don't see why they **_**wouldn't**_**, but…I don't know). So if you don't watch SNL, some dialogue might not make sense. If you do, you might recognize some quotes. Some are recent, some are fairly old. Seriously, 90 percent of Emmett's dialogue are quotes. So if you have no idea what they're talking about, I'm very sorry. Have you noticed I absolutely love SNL? Haha. This chapter was written purely for my entertainment, if you don't understand or like it…then all you really have to know is that Emmett is a hilarious idiot (in the best way possible) and all the Cullen's love Edward. Happy reading.**

**~Em

* * *

**

Chapter 22: SNL

Song: Breathe Me by Sia (basically how Edward feels)

Help, I have done it again

I have been here many times before

Hurt myself again today

And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend

Hold me, wrap me up

Unfold me

I am small

I'm needy

Warm me up

And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again

Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,

Yeah I think that I might break

I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Be my friend

Hold me, wrap me up

Unfold me

I am small

I'm needy

Warm me up

And breathe me

Be my friend

Hold me, wrap me up

Unfold me

I am small

I'm needy

Warm me up

And breathe me

Edward POV (EDWARD!!!!!! EVERYBODY SQUEEEEEAAAAAAAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!):

Pain. That is the only word to describe me. To describe my life, my feelings, everything. It's been over a month since I found out my reason for existing was dead. Over a month since that pain and emptiness had consumed me.

The Cullen's tried to keep me busy. Rosalie always asked me to help her fine tune the cars. Carlisle always asked me my opinions on literature and science and always recommended books. All the books he suggested had happy endings. They were way too unrealistic. Esme always asked me to play the piano. Emmett always asked me to wrestle or play video games. I would do these things, but they just kept me physically busy. They didn't stop me from thinking of Bella, thinking about what I lost.

I concluded it was my fault Bella was dead. She never would have been in the cemetery if I hadn't died.

I was sitting on the couch in the living room of our new house in Portland, Oregon, just staring off into space, thinking about Bella. I didn't try to, but I overheard part of Emmett and Rosalie's conversation in the kitchen.

"I wish there was a way to make him feel better." Rosalie said.

"Yeah, he's been pretty bummed lately." Emmett replied.

"He's been more than 'bummed'. He's exactly like _she_ was!" Everyone stopped saying Bella's name after it happened. "He's catatonic! The only difference is he can't cry."

"We just gotta pull him outta this funk. He can't be like this forever."

"Yeah, but it's only been a month and a half. We should let him mourn. But my fear is that he _will_ be like this forever." Rosalie said.

"He can mourn, but he's making me depressed because _he's_ depressed!" Emmett whined.

"Hey, you're the one that wanted to change him. He wouldn't be mourning her death if he wasn't a vampire." Rosalie said.

"Yeah, you're right. He'd be _dead_. He couldn't mourn _then_." Rosalie sighed. "Besides, I got a plan to make him chipper. At least for an hour or so." Emmett said.

"Oh really. And how are you going to do that?" Rosalie asked.

"Strategery."

I could hear Rosalie's confused thoughts as Emmett burst into the living room.

"Good evening. I'm Emmett Cullen and you're not!" He cried. I looked up, surprised at his outburst.

"Okay…" I nodded. He strolled forward and plopped down on a chair facing me.

Rosalie walked in cautiously. "Emmett, what are you doing?"

"Edward is like some crazy aunt living down in the basement: everyone knows she's there, but no one wants to talk about her. Now, if you don't deal with her, she's just going to get ornerier and stinkier. I say take the bitch upstairs, slap her around, and hose her down." Emmett replied.

"What?" I asked. I was very confused.

"Dana Carvey! As Ross Perot!" Rosalie cried.

Emmett winked and nodded. Rosalie smiled and nodded back.

Emmett turned to me. "I pose a conundrum to you. A riddle, if you will." He said in what sounded like s Sean Connery impression.

_Say "I don't want to hear it"._ Rosalie thought.

I turned to her curiously, but though maybe this would help explain things, so I said, "I don't want to hear it."

Emmett grinned and continued. "What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck…I can't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore."

"Funny." I said in a monotone voice. Rosalie giggled.

Emmett started again, this time in a German accent. "Vould you like to touch my monkey?"

Rosalie cracked up. I think I started to get it.

"Dieter? From 'Sprockets'? On Saturday Night Live? You're giving me SNL quotes? Who are you?" I asked. What kind of person did that?

"I'm Emmett dammit!"

I sighed. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because you look – and probably feel – like shit. Just have some fun for once." Rosalie said.

"I'm fine." I said.

"No, you're right. You look _mahvelous_!" Emmett said.

"I have a right to feel like shit. My whole world just came crashing down."

"My father always used to say, it's always something. If it's not one thing, it's another."

"Emmett, could you stop with the quotes?"

Emmett bent his head and stuck his fingers under his armpits.

I sighed. "_What_ are you doing?"

He pulled out his hands and took a big whiff. In another voice, he said, "Sometimes, when I get nervous, I put my fingers in my armpits and sniff them like that. I'm a…superstar!" He raised his arms above his head.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. "Esme! Carlisle! Make him stop!" I called. Rosalie laughed and thought, _Oh man, he's calling in Mommy and Daddy! Is he gunna make them spank us?_

"Bitch." I whispered under my breath, with a smile. She knew I was joking.

Esme and Carlisle walked in.

"What bothers me the most is when people say Rosalie is bitch. And let me say something. Yeah she is! And so am I, and so is this one!" He said, pointing to me. "You know what? Bitches get stuff done. That's why Catholic schools use nuns as teachers and not priests. Those nuns are mean old queens, and they sleep on cots, and they're allowed to hit you. And at the end of the school year, you hated those bitches, but you knew the capitol of Vermont! So I'm saying it's not too late, Esme and Carlisle, get on board! Bitch is the new vampire!" Esme, Carlisle and Rosalie were all laughing by the end of Emmett's speech.

With Carlisle and Esme now in on the joke, they joined in.

"I love it-love it-love it!" Esme said when she found out from Rosalie why they were quoting SNL skits.

"What's your favorite SNL quote, honey?" Esme asked Carlisle.

"You kids are probably saying to yourselves, "Now, I'm gonna go out, and "I'm gonna get the world by the tail and wrap it around, pull it down, and put it in my pocket!" Well, I'm here to tell you that you're probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you're not gonna amount to JACK SQUAT! You're gonna end up eating a steady diet of government cheese and living in a van down by the river!" Carlisle recited. "You?" He asked Esme.

"I got a FEVER! And the only prescription…is MORE COWBELL!" Esme said.

"We are two wild and crazy guys." I whispered, smiling a little. All four heads snapped in my direction.

"What?" Rosalie asked.

"We are two wild and crazy guys." I said louder, in the accent Steve Martin used when he said it in the Festrunk Brothers skit. "That's my favorite quote from SNL."

Rosalie and Emmett got on the ground at my feet and bowed, saying, "We're not worthy. We're not worthy." I told them to get up.

"You're right." Emmett said once he was back in his chair. "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!" Emmett said.

"What about you, Rose? What's your favorite quote?" Esme asked.

"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths." Rosalie said, and everyone laughed.

We were all quiet for a minute. Emmett's plan of quoting me to blissfulness didn't seem to go as wells as he had planned. Esme eventually got up to go back to the garden, Carlisle to his study, both with smiles still on their faces. Emmet stood up.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen is still dead. But his condition is stable." Emmett said. Rosalie stood up with him. "Buh-bye." Emmett said, loudly.

"Simmah down nah!!!" I quoted.

Emmett grinned and slapped me on the shoulder.

"Let's go play some video games. I bet you 20 bucks that I'll beat you at Guitar Hero again." He said.

"I'll take that bet. I'm sure I'm the words greatest rockstar!" I stood up and shook his hand. We headed towards the game room. As we were walking, I was thinking about Emmett's SNL quote game and why he (and everyone else) did it. It's because they cared about me, didn't want to see me upset. They loved me. I smiled; something I hadn't done in over a month.

* * *

**A/N: I have a web site now. I don't know if any of you are interested, but I'm going to be putting up more stories that aren't fan fictions there, so if you like my writing...they'll be under the 'blog' section if any of you are interested. You'd also get to here more of my ramblings about nothing! Yay! I know that sounds tempting. ;)  
**

**For those of you that don't watch SNL or couldn't recognize all the quotes, here they are (I also slightly changed some quotes to fit the situation, so the real words are in parenthesis):**

1) Strategery

2) Good evening. I'm (Chevy Chase) Emmett Cullen and you're not.

3) (The deficit) Edward is like some crazy aunt living down in the basement: everyone knows she's there, but no one wants to talk about her. Now, if you don't deal with her, she's just going to get ornerier and stinkier. I say take the bitch upstairs, slap her around, and hose her down.

4) (Sean Connery) Emmett: I pose a conundrum, a riddle, if you will.

(Alex Trebeck) Edward: I don't want to hear it.

(Sean Connery) Emmett: What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck…I can't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore.

5) Vould you like to touch my monkey?

6) I'm (Gumby) Emmett dammit!

7) You look mahvelous!

8) My father always used to say, it's always something. If it's not one thing, it's another.

9) Sometimes, when I get nervous, I put my fingers in my armpits and sniff them like that.

10) Superstar!

11) What bothers me the most is when people say (Hillary Clinton) Rosalie is bitch. And let me say something. Yeah she is! And so am I, and so is this one (points to Amy Poehler). You know what? Bitches get stuff done. That's why Catholic schools use nuns as teachers and not priests. Those nuns are mean old queens, and they sleep on cots, and they're allowed to hit you. And at the end of the school year, you hated those bitches, but you knew the capitol of Vermont! So I'm saying it's not too late (Texas) Esme and (Ohio) Carlisle, get on board! Bitch is the new (black) vampire!

12) I love it-love it-love it!

13) You kids are probably saying to yourselves, "Now, I'm gonna go out, and I'm gonna get the world by the tail and wrap it around, pull it down, and put it in my pocket!" Well, I'm here to tell you that you're probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you're not gonna amount to JACK SQUAT! You're gonna end up eating a steady diet of government cheese and living in a van down by the river

14) I got a FEVER! And the only prescription…is MORE COWBELL!

15) We are two wild and crazy guys!

16) We're not worthy. (From Wayne's World)

17) I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!

18) A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. **(I hope everyone understands why this is **_**Rosalie's**_** favorite quote.)**

19) (Generalissimo Francisco Franco) Edward Anthony Masen Cullen is still dead. But his condition is stable.

20) Buh-bye

21) Simmah down nah!!!

**Wow, that was much longer than I first anticipated.**

…

**That's what she said!**

**Haha, sorry. I couldn't help myself. ;D**

**~Emmy**


	25. Riley's Advances

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: You should all know this was **_**very**_** hard for me to write. Riley and Bella? Ew. But it **_**has**_** to happen, so bear with me. I **_**tried**_** to make this longer. I tried! It didn't work too well. It actually ended up shorter. Damn. If at first you don't succeed, try again, I say. So I'll **_**try**_** to make the next chapter longer. **

**~Emmy

* * *

**

Chapter 23: Riley's Advances

Song: I Will Possess Your Heart by Death Cab for Cutie

How I wish you could see the potential

The potential of you and me

It's like a book elegantly bound

But in a language you can't read just yet

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

There are days when outside your window

I see my reflection as I slowly pass

And I long for this mirrored perspective

When we'll be lovers, lovers at last

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

I will possess your heart

I will possess your heart

You reject my advances and desperate pleas

I won't let you let me down so easily

So easily

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

I will possess your heart

I will possess your heart

Riley POV

I watched as Victoria back away, and with a wink she ran, I couldn't believe how lucky I was. Her, that beautiful angel, wanted _me_! I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her that she was the one. She would complete me. And she was drop dead gorgeous! Alice and Bella were okay, though Alice was too tiny and annoying and Bella's personality just screamed _boring_! _Victoria_ on the other hand was beautiful, perfect, gorgeous, exotic. It was like she was molded, just for me. I even had a thing for red heads.

I stood there for a minute, just thinking about her. Then I remembered my mission and ran back to Jasper, Alice, and Bella.

They were still frozen when I got there. When I was a few feet away, they unfroze, and stared at me. If they remembered, I'd have to tell them to forget.

"Riley? Would you like to explain something to us?" Jasper said slowly.

"No." I said.

All three looked startled.

"Explain what just happened! You told us not to follow you, and then we lost control! We froze! Explain!" Alice squeaked in her obnoxiously fast voice.

"Forget that happened." I ordered to all of them. They all closed their mouths, opened their eyes wide, then relaxed. It was quiet for a minute while their minds were erasing the last hour.

"So we should hunt again! You two newborns need to be well fed." Alice said in a happy voice. I was safe, they didn't remember.

Now I had to plan my 'courtship' of Bella. I had to start subtle, and build on it. For a few days I'd just always be close to her, brushing up against her. Then I'd talk to her. Learn her interests; pretend we have things in common. Then, while we were hunting one day, I'd get her alone and profess my 'love' towards her. I planned exactly what I was going to say and everything.

Alice snapped her head up and grinned at me. I turned away from her gaze but smiled to myself. It'll be that much easier if Alice is on my side.

As we split apart to hunt, she passed me and whispered, "Go for it, big guy." with a wink. I silently laughed and ran to get something to eat.

* * *

I stuck to my plan. Brushes as I passed, gentle touches. I talked to her, laughed with her.

Sometimes I'd see something in her eyes when we talked. I couldn't call it _love_ (at least not yet), but interest. At first she was confused when I started talking to her. I hated her before, and didn't try to keep it that much of a secret. Now, I like her? She must be _very_ confused. Just as well, confusion was better than hatred.

"Speech day" had arrived.

"Bella?" I called as she was starting to head in the direction of a deer-scent.

"Yes?" She asked, coming over. I looked up at Alice, who winked at me and lead Jasper away. Okay, I had to feel nervous so Bella believed me. I thought back to the time I gave my first speech as Student President and remembered how I felt.

"Riley? Why are you so nervous? What's going on?" Bella asked. I sighed and sat down on a near-by log.

"I just…I can't hold it in any more, Bella. I don't know how you feel about me, but I have to tell you how I feel about you." I said.

She looked stunned. "Me?" She squeaked out. "And how _do_ you…_feel_…about me?" She asked.

"Bella, I love you! I'm in love with you! Ever since I laid eyes on you! Those three days of immeasurable pain? _Nothing_ compared to how it feels when I think about you not feeling the same. I didn't tell you sooner because I knew you were out of my league. I knew that someone like _you_, beautiful, perfect, you, could never stop so low for someone like _me_, vile, ugly, unworthy, me. So I was going to keep it from you. But I _can't_! I love you too much! I live for you, Bella! I'm here for only you! Just being in your presence makes me blissfully happy. I can't hide my undying love for you anymore, Bella."

She stood there with her mouth open, eyes wide.

"I don't know what to say." She whispered.

I got on my knees in front of her. "Say you love me too." I whispered.

She didn't hesitate. "I love you too." She looked confused by her outburst.

Oh no, did I just give her a command? I didn't mean to. Hopefully she doesn't suspect anything. Not that I got her to say it, I need her to feel it.

* * *

Bella POV

He got to his knees in front of me.

"Say you love me too."

"I love you too." _Whoa!_ Where did _that_ come from? I hesitated. _Did_ I love him? I tried to analyze my feelings for Riley. I thought back to a few days ago, when he started acting different. When he'd brush me as e passed, the touches. They felt _nice_ but they didn't feel _right_.

And after that, the talks we'd have. I started to like them. No, I started to _love_ them. Did I love the _conversations, _or did I love _him_? I…_thought_ just the conversations, but then why would I blurt out "I love you too" so easily? That has to mean _something_. Did I…_subconsciously_ love him? How could I subconsciously love him? If I loved someone, wouldn't I be the first to know?

Well, I had never felt love (or at least I didn't remember if I had). Was this love? Maybe? Could it possibly be?

All these thoughts ran through my head in a matter of seconds.

Riley jumped up, and hugged me tightly. "You have no idea how glorious it feels to hear you say that!" Riley cried. "I love you so much, Bella. With my entire being!"

I was shocked. _Shit!_ _Now_ what do I do?!

He thinks I love him, but I don't know if I truly did! I mean, I _liked_ him, and maybe my feelings could grow, but I didn't love his this second! I couldn't!

I heard Alice come running up, squealing, Jasper close behind.

"I _knew_ it! From the moment we decided you were going to change! I _knew_ it! Bella, didn't I know it? Oh, you weren't really paying attention when I had that vision…Jasper! Didn't I know it?"

"Yes, you knew it."

"Yeah! I _knew_ it!" Alice was jumping up and down, clapping her hands, Jasper looked at her adoringly, Riley laughed along with Alice, and I didn't know what to do. Should I be happy? Should I be mad? Should I be sad? I settled on shock.

Now that Riley and Alice thought I love him, I had to go through with it. Or at least try. I'd disappoint them both so badly if I just suddenly changed me mind; especially Riley! Now I had to follow though, as far as I could. People can change their minds, right? People break up all the time, do they not? But hadn't Alice once said that vampire mates are for _life?_ (Or death, depends on how you look at it). Once you fell in love with someone when you were a vampire, there's no going back. At least not easily. A vampire's love is true. A mate is a _soul _mate. You can't change your feelings about a soul mate, could you? Nobody had heard of a vampire doing so. Humans called their mates their soul mates, but people get divorced all the time. Are human feelings more fragile and prone to breaking than a vampires feelings? This, I didn't know. I don't remember anything about being human, including my feelings, and I hadn't had any of that experience as a vampire yet.

For all I know, what I feel _is_ love, and Riley _is_ my soul mate. I didn't know for certain (though _he_ seemed to) but I guess I'd find out. Like I said, I'd try to make this work, for Alice and Riley.

And maybe I could ask Jasper to read my emotions on a deeper level and tell me if there is love somewhere in there. When Alice and Riley aren't around, though. I don't want them to think I doubt toward my mate.

So that was it, then. Riley was my mate.

* * *

**A/N: Ok, if there are grammar mistakes in this, I'm very sorry, but I just wanted to get this up so I skimmed it while editing. Edward's going to have another chapter up next. I'm not sure if it should be all him suffering, or if Emmett should get involved again. I have an idea for Emmett...but I think I need to express just how much pain Edward is really in...except a whole chapter of angsty, emo Edward will be really hard for me to do, and it will probably end up really short. **

**So I guess I'm posing a question to y'all. Should the next chapter be all Emo Edward or should Emmett cheer him up again? I'll put a poll up (first time making a poll! Yippie!) and you guys vote. You can review or PM you're vote if you want to explain your vote and why I should do whichever one (I'll probably look at those more seriously and they'll have more weight on my decision). **

**Haha, look at me making a big deal about if the next chapter is going to be angsty or 'funny'...**

**~Emmy  
**


	26. Emmett's Bet

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Happy new year, everyone! I know, I'm a little late saying that, aren't I? **

**Whew, ok, I'm back for now. Finals are still ahead, though. But I'm a lucky little duck! With all the snow days we got, they are pushing finals back a week so I can update sooner! Yay! I've had this chapter written for a while, I just didn't know when I would be able to post it, but here it is. I was going to wait to post this until I knew I could start updating regularly again, but I couldn't wait. I was getting too anxious to see what you guys thought. I am _addicted_ to reviews, I swear...  
**

**And thank you everyone for your kind words! They really made me feel better and I loved them all! In case you all were wondering, my grandpa is doing fine, and him and my grandma are living with us now. **

**So, getting to the chapter, I went with the cheerful one. I know; I'm an awful person. There were more votes for angst. Though this is definitely my fault, I was anticipating more votes for the opposite. Oh well. I needed to cheer myself up, anyway. **

**But don't freak out, emo-lovers! I swear (and this time I mean it) that the **_**next**_** Edward chapter will be all angst!!!! Ok! No freak-outs! Nobody have a fit! I already have written! I love it, and I would have put it here instead of this one, but…well you'll see why I couldn't exactly do that when you read the all-angst one. So you'll get that chapter after the next two chapters. Ok? Ok. Whew, I just might have gotten out of this with my head still intact, without anyone biting it off…**

**There is a paragraph of angst, but there's also Emmett and his cheerfulness. So enjoy: **

**~Emmy

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Chapter 24: Emmett's Bet

Song: Broken by Seether

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh

I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away

I keep your photograph, I know it serves me well

I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

'Cause I'm broken when I'm open

And I don't feel like I am strong enough

'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome

And I don't feel right when you're gone away

The worst is over now and we can breathe again

I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away

There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight

I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

[x2]

'Cause I'm broken when I'm open

And I don't feel like I am strong enough

'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome

And I don't feel right when you're gone away

Edward POV

It was getting worse, the pain. Everyone thought it would get better with time; that I would heal. But it had the opposite effect. It was like some had cut open a hole in my chest and took my heart when I found out Bella was dead. When I was running after the vampires that had taken her, it was like I was running after the thieves that had taken my heart, and I was trying to get it back, but I couldn't. Throughout the days and weeks with the Cullen's, my new family, they slowly sewed up the hole with sloppy, painful stitches. The only thing was, for every one stitch the Cullen's put in, I'd see something that reminded me of Bella and that would rip out two stitches with such a force that I usually gasped with pain.

The Cullen's never stopped putting those stitches back in though, especially Emmett

"Okay Edward, here's what we're going to do—" He said bursting in (like always).

"Emmett! No!" I groaned. I never wanted to muster up the energy it took to keep up with Emmett and his Game of the Day.

"Oh, come on! You don't even know what it is yet!"

I sighed. "Ok. Fine, tell me what it is." I said.

"Well, I was thinking—"

"Emmett, you know you shouldn't think, you might strain yourself." I laughed.

He growled. "May I?" He asked. I waved my hand, motioning for him to continue.

"I was thinking that it'd be fun it we got a few bets going!"

"Absolutely not!"

"Aw, come on!" Emmett pouted.

"No! Emmett, I'm not the gambling type."

"Come on! A few bets every now and then are healthy!" He whined.

I sighed again.

"Yes!" He pumped his fist in the air.

"That wasn't a yes!"

"It was enough for me!" He said, picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder as he headed into the kitchen.

"You are slowly taking away every ounce of my dignity, you know that right?" I said.

He laughed his booming laugh. "I had to carry you to make sure you didn't run away!"

I sighed – again.

"What are you doing? Blowing all the hot air out of your big head?" Emmett laughed at his own joke.

"Ha ha, you are so hilarious, Emmett." I said humorlessly.

"Thank you! I'll be here all week!"

When we got to the kitchen, Emmett sat me down on one of the stools to the counter. Rosalie was on the other side of the counter with a stopwatch in her hand. Emmett sat down on the stool next to me. I looked down at the counter in front of me. There was a _huge_ plate of human food in front of both Emmett and me. Fruits, vegetables, meats, bread… every food I could think of.

"What the…?"

Rosalie laughed. "You haven't told him yet?"

Emmett laughed too. "You would have heard me if I had."

"He didn't sneak into your mind and get the answer?" She asked.

I sighed. "You know I don't do that, Rosalie. I really try to stay out of everyone's heads."

"Aw, she's just trying to get under your skin. Ignore her." Emmett said, pushing my huge platter of human food closer to me. "_This_ is what you have to think about now."

"What are you talking about?" I asked. I didn't like where this was going.

"Ah yes, you're finally getting interested in the bet."

"No, I just want to know what it is so I know what I'll be running away from in a minute."

"Oh no you won't! That's automatic disqualification and I automatically win the bet, which is not in your best interest." Emmett said.

"And _why _isn't it in my best interest?" I asked.

"Because if I win you can't buy, play, or listen to a single song or music piece for three months." He said smugly.

"_What_?" I asked, dumbfounded. "And when was _this_ decided?" I asked. Music was the only thing in my life that hadn't changed. Music made me feel better. Not perfect, not great, but it was another stitch in the hole to my stolen heart.

"It comes with the bet." Emmett shrugged.

"And what_ is_ the bet?" I asked.

"Whoever can _swallow_ the most human food on their platter in three minute. Not a millisecond more." He said even more smugly.

I thought about this. I hadn't tasted human food since I was, well, human. I hadn't had the need or the desire. How hard could it be?

"And what if I win?" I asked

"You choose. But it has to be equal to or less than the value of my wager." He said.

What would I want from Emmett? Nothing, really. What could I take away from him that would make him suffer the same amount if I lost my music for three months? It didn't take me long to think of something.

"You and Rosalie can't have sex for three months." I said.

His jaw dropped.

"Hey! That's punishing me too!" Rosalie whined.

"Were you in on this little bet?" I asked. She nodded. "Then I have no guilt for my wager decision." I said, smiling at her. She hissed at me in return.

Emmett stuck his hand in front of me. I looked at it with confusion.

"Shake!" Rosalie barked, as if I were a dog. I grabbed Emmett's hand, which he pumped up and down with enthusiasm. _Good boy_. Rosalie thought.

"Deal!" Emmett bellowed. Rosalie sighed. In her mind, she was sure Emmett was going to win, so she didn't have anything to worry about. At least, that's what she kept telling herself.

"So, you'll notice that both your piles of food are in order around the plate from smallest to largest. This is the order you will eat everything. Whoever has the most food still on their plate after I say "stop" will lose. If you have any food in your mouth that hasn't been swallowed, it won't count. If you swallow anything after I say "stop" you will automatically be disqualified and lose the bet. Everyone understand?" Rosalie said. We both nodded. "You have three minutes. Go!"

Emmett and I immediately dove into our plates. In the first five seconds I had already swallowed all the nuts and grapes on my plate. _This stuff is __foul_! I thought, but kept shoveling it into my mouth. I saw Emmett eyeing my reaction while he was stuffing his face. _That didn't even make him hesitate._ Emmett thought. _I was counting on his delay…crap…_ Rosalie was thinking along the same lines.

At two minutes, Emmett was a little bit ahead of me. It didn't help that he was trying to distract me with his thoughts by thinking of a chicken in a stocking cap, bra, and thong, dancing. _Where in the world has he seen that before?_ I thought. That one was definitely a memory.

Then he started thinking about him and Rosalie…_together_. He was probably trying to make me throw up.

I glared at him.

"What? What did I miss?" Rosalie asked.

"I was trying to distract him." Emmett said after he swallowed the food in his mouth.

_Perfect._ I thought with a grin. The time he took to answer gave me the opportunity to get ahead of him. We were at two minutes, fifty seconds.

"Emmett!!!" Rosalie cried, pointing to my plate, then his.

"What? What's wrong?" He asked looking around.

"_Eat!_ You _imbecile_! You're going to make us lose sex!"

Emmett looked down at his plate then mine. I was substantially ahead of him.

_Shit_! He thought, then dived into his plate again.

"Time!" Rosalie cried. "Stop!" She pulled our plates away from us. "Open you mouths." She ordered, looking to make sure we weren't cheating.

We looked down at the plates. I had two pieces of pizza left. Emmett had two pieces of pizza and a pile of carrots.

_Shit!_ He thought.

I win!

"Yes!" I cried, jumping up and pumping my fists in the air. "I get my music! I get my music! You don't get sex! You don't get sex! Ha ha ha ha ha!" I laughed in their faces. I sauntered out of the kitchen with my chin held high.

"Where are you going?" Emmett called after me.

"To go listen to some victory music!"

"Maybe you should go barf up your human food first." Rosalie said.

I turned back to them.

"What?" I asked. No one said I had to be barfing up anything!

Rosalie laughed. "What did you think was going to happen to the food? It'll sit in your stomach until you throw it up. And it's a weird feeling when it's in there for a long time because it starts to rot after awhile. Your best bet is to get it out of there." Rosalie said.

"Seriously? Why didn't you tell me this _before_ I agreed to this stupid bet?" I scrunched my nose in disgust.

"I call bathroom first!" Emmett said running ahead of me, not answering my question.

Rosalie walked up next to me. "Good day?" She asked.

"Yeah, good day." I said smiling. "I don't have a lot of those."

"With me, you will." Emmett called from the bathroom.

I chuckled. "Yeah, maybe I will."

* * *

**A/N: Oh no! Another author's note! Run away before it eats you with it's huge-ness! Actually, I'd appreciate it if you guys read this one; I need your guys' help:**

**Ok, has anyone ever read a fan fiction where Edward meets Bella in 1918? Like an all human or something where they meet in his time, not hers? I have a kinda-sorta-maybe idea but I don't want to do it if it's been done before. So if anyone has read a story like that, maybe send me the link? If I don't write one like that then I definitely want to read one. Thank you!**

**~Emmy  
**


	27. Good Riddance

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: It's my birthday today! Woot! (January 12 for those of you reading this after that date).  
**

**Every time I try to make a chapter longer it ends up shorter!!!! UGH!!!! **

**Oh, and thank you everyone who sent me a link to a 1918 story! I started reading most of them. Though, none of them are quite like what I had in my mind to write, which is good. That means I get to write it without feeling guilty or something! Woo hoo! But still keep 'em coming if you read more! Much appreciated! :D  


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Chapter 25: Good Riddance

Song: Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) by Green Day **(Haha, it's supposed to be sarcastic. Hahaha, get it? Well, I guess you won't until you finish the chapter...I enjoyed it tho XD)**

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road

Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go

So make the best of this test, and don't ask why

It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind

Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time

Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial

For what it's worth it was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

Jasper POV

I gotta say, my life was pretty perfect. Maybe the first few decades of my being a vampire wasn't so great, the war, the anger, the blood lust. But Alice made up for it all. Alice was my perfect little pixie. She was bliss. She was tiny but made up for it in her huge personality. She was always happy, which made me happy, because of my power, but also because she was my everything, my life. If she was happy, I was happy. If she was sad, I was sad. If she was mad, I was mad. With or without a power.

And Bella was part of her happiness. They were absolutely best friends, their feelings toward each other were like sisters, couldn't be closer. That made her my sister-in-law, and she was like a sister to me too. She was a pleasant, calm person, and she was happy.

But Riley. I wasn't sure about Riley. Alice really wanted Bella and Riley together, and Riley definitely felt love, but Bella…didn't. I didn't try to dig into her feelings until she asked me too. She had walked up to me tentatively when we were hunting once and asked me to really look into her feelings and emotions.

That's when I found out she wasn't really that happy. She wasn't mad or sad, but she was confused. I asked about that, and she explained she didn't know her feelings toward Riley, that's why she was asking me to do this.

I nodded and took another look at her feelings. I tried to feel under the confusion, that's where the answer would be. There were hints of sadness and loneliness. I asked about that too.

"I don't really know. I've always felt, or at least since I changed, that I'm missing something; that there was bliss in my life or there is supposed to be, but it's not there. It's like there's a huge part of my life gone. I don't know what that something is, though." Bella explained.

I nodded again. "Do you feel that that space has closed a little since you first felt it?" I asked. I thought back to where we found her, at a cemetery. When Bella was changing and Alice asked her about it, Alice found out it was a boyfriend that had died. Maybe the boyfriends loss was the empty space she felt now. If that space had closed a little since she met Riley, there was a good chance she could love him and be true mates.

"I…uh…" She hesitated. "Yeah…a little, I suppose."

I smiled. "You may not love him right now, but I'm almost certain you will."

She grinned. "Thank you, Jasper. I'm glad I don't have to hurt anyone; Riley or Alice."

I smiled back. "Anytime, Bella."

We went to go find Alice and Riley, who were hunting.

That's when I came across a scent that I didn't recognize. Another vampire's scent.

"Jasper!" I heard Alice say from a few dozen yards away.

Bella and I ran to her, where she was standing with Riley.

"Alice-"

"Jasper-" We said at the same time.

"You first." I said.

"I saw a vampire. She's going to kill Bella." Alice said. I saw Riley's eyes go wide.

"I caught her scent. I believe she's still close. Why does she want to kill Bella?" I asked. We started running the opposite direction of where the vampire's scent was.

"I'm not sure. I saw you and Bella talking, then she walks in, looks surprised to see you, and was about to runaway when she seemed to change her mind and attacked Bella. A few different scenarios passed through, but most of them Bella ended up being dead." Alice said.

"What did she look like?" Bella asked.

"Very feline-looking, fire-red hair." Alice said.

"I don't know her." Bella said.

"Can you tell if she's following us?" I asked Alice.

"Yes, I think she's following. I see a few scenarios where she catches up with us."

"We have to lose her, throw her off our trail." I said.

Alice nodded. "I have an idea."

"Yes, that'll work." Bella said.

"You know it's kinda frustrating when you two have a vision and don't share with the rest of us." Riley said.

Alice said, "You'll see. We don't know it this vampire has a power, so the less you two know, the better." She motioned towards me and Riley. "Ok, we're going to have to split up."

"But-" I started.

"No, Jasper, don't worry. I've already seen this working. Don't argue."

I nodded in defeat.

"Ok, Riley, go north. Don't stop for three miles. Jasper, go east. Don't stop until you reach a town. The closest. Town that way is a little under two and a half miles. I'll go west. The vampires coming from the south." Alice directed. "Stay in your places until I come and get you." Me and Riley nodded. "Okay, everyone stop at that tree up there." Alice said, pointing to a massive tree coming up. We did as she told us.

"Okay, you all know where to go from here. Bella, you know what to do." Alice said. Bella nodded.

We all went our separate ways, except for Bella, who stayed at the tree. I didn't know what exactly was going on, but I knew Alice would explain later.

* * *

Bella POV

As the others ran off, I ran around the huge tree a few times, making sure my scent clung to the tree heavily. Then I followed Alice's trail running my hands along the plants and trees as I passed, making my scent much stronger than Alice's. I stopped and turned around a mile before I reached her where she was stopped. I followed my trail exactly until I got back to the tree, which I circled again. I did this with Jasper and Riley's trails too. When I got back to the tree this time, I climbed it to the top, trying to touch as little as possible. My scent was there, but barely, it was hardly noticeable, especially compared to the other trails I left.

Ten minutes later, I saw the flame-haired vampire approach the tree. She circled it a few times, probably wondering why my scent circled it. She followed each trail in turn, but always returned to the tree. She went to follow my trail that was over Riley's a second time.

I took this opportunity to run over mine and Alice's trail again, this time running all the way to her.

"She's confused, going back over the trails again like we saw." I told her.

"Okay, let's go." Alice said. We ran farther and around until we got to Jasper.

"Is something wrong?" Jasper asked.

"No, no. Everything's going perfectly. In five minutes she's going to go back to the tree; that's when we get Riley and book it north. Ten miles up there's going to be a huge rainstorm in half in hour. We stay in that and she won't be able to follow up." Alice said.

We waited the five minutes then ran to Riley.

"Come on." I said, grabbing Riley's hand. We ran to the rainstorm.

"Is that it? Is she off out trail?" Riley asked.

"Almost." She won't know where to go for twenty minutes. We'll be in the rainstorm, and if e follow it she won't be able to tell where we are." Alice said.

* * *

Victoria POV **(Victoria will be cussing like a sailor. You have been warned.)**

Damn it. Where was she? Where was Bella? I just got back to the tree from her and Riley's trail. I went down her and Jasper's again. No good, it just cut off again. I went back to the tree. They did this on purpose. They must have caught my scent. How could I make such a fatal mistake? How could I let them catch me? Was I that _stupid_?

I stood at the tree, leaning against it. What was I going to do? They have me running in circles! I banged the back of my head against the tree, making an indent. I looked up at the sky and the forest ceiling. Sighing, I was getting ready to go back to Riley, when I caught another whiff of Bella. It came from…up. It wasn't strong, though. Had she climbed the tree? Was she _in_ the _tree_ the whole time!?

I quickly climbed the tree to the top. She had been here, alright. She had left, though. _Shit!_ She was here the _whole fucking time_! I roared as loud as I could. I could have _had_ her!

So where was she now? I climbed down the tree. I had just come from Riley and Jasper's trails for the second time. That left Alice. I followed Bella's scent. I stopped where it should have cut off, where it _did_ cut off twenty minutes ago. But this time it kept going. It was weaker because it wasn't deliberate, but it was there.

I reached where Alice's scent was the strongest, where she must have stood waiting. It mingled a little with Bella's scent. The scents turned. I followed them. They led to where Jasper stood. All three scents kept going. They reached where Riley had stood. They kept going, so I did too. They kept running for miles. Did they think _this_ was going to stop me? This stalled me, but I knew exactly where they were.

That's when I felt a rain drop on my nose. The farther I ran the more and more rain came down. _It was washing way their scents!_ The rain was coming down so hard now it was like a wall of rain everywhere I turned. I was soaked; I felt like I had just jumped into an ocean. I couldn't smell them anywhere! _Fuck!_

I ran around for hours, trying to find a trace of a scent, but nothing. They were gone. Completely. I roared even louder than I had back in the tree.

My only consolation was that Riley was still with them. He knew what to do, and hopefully he would keep it up until I found them all again.

* * *

**A/N: Everyone say bye-bye to Victoria! She left in time for my birthday! Yay! What a great birthday gift.  
**

**Oh, and in case anyone was wondering, I don't actually know if any of that stuff was possible (of course it's fantasy, but you know what I mean). I don't exactly know the mechanics of a vampire's nose and how far they can actually smell, but let's just pretend that could actually happen. I needed to think of a way to get rid of Victoria that would actually make sense, and I don't know if I actually achieved that. But I guess you can tell me if it worked or not.  
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**I absolutely LOVE reviews, so…for my birthday y'all should review! Yes? :D**

**  
~Emmy**


	28. 10 Years Later With the Whitlocks

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Ok, the next two chapters might be considered boring by some people. Sorry, but this is information that has to be said for the story to move forward.**

**And I really hate editing and I have NO time right now, so if there are spelling mistakes, very sorry.  
**

**~Emmy

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Chapter 26: 10 Years Later With the Whitlocks 

Song: Bubbly by Colbie Caillat **(It is **_**so**_** bad that Bella feels this way…)**

I've been awake for a while now

You've got me feelin' like a child now

'Cause every time I see your bubbly face

I get the tinglees in a silly place

It starts in my toes

And I crinkle my nose

Wherever it goes I always know

That you make me smile

Please stay for a while now

Just take your time

Wherever you go

The rain is fallin' on my window pane

But we are hidin' in a safer place

Under the covers stayin' dry and warm

You give me feelings that I adore

They start in my toes

Make me crinkle my nose

Wherever it goes

I always know

That you make me smile

Please stay for a while now

Just take your time

Wherever you go

What am I gonna say

When you make me feel this way?

I just, mmm

It starts in my toes

Makes me crinkle my nose

Wherever it goes

I always know

That you make me smile

Please stay for a while now

Just take your time

Wherever you go

I've been asleep for a while now

You tucked me in just like a child now

'Cause every time you hold me in your arms

I'm comfortable enough to feel your warmth

It starts in my soul

And I lose all control

When you kiss my nose

The feelin' shows

'Cause you make me smile

Baby just take your time now

Holdin' me tight

Wherever, wherever, where ever you go

Wherever, wherever, where ever you go

Bella POV

Time passed. One year, three, five, ten. Once Riley and I weren't newborns and had more control, we stopped roaming the forests and started settling in "permanent" residences. We had to move about every three years, sometimes shorter. Being around humans was still hard for us, especially Jasper and Riley, so every other place we moved did we actually go out to school, pretend to be emancipated orphans or something. We were the outcasts, though girls followed Jasper and Riley (at a distance) and guys followed Alice and me with their eyes. When our years of living there were up, we'd move to somewhere isolated. A cabin in one forest or another, usually. We'd spend longer there because there was no one around us to see that we didn't age. We'd move from these places, usually just for a change of scenery. We'd move back to civilization to make sure we were keeping up with the times. We didn't want to get stuck in one period of time. That was one of burdens of being a vampire; we had to go with what the people of this time were doing. We couldn't hold on to our decrepit ipods and our now out-of-style clothes.

"Ooh I can't wait until leggings with dresses come back!" Alice said one day, a few years after they had gone out of style. "Those were one of my favorites!"

Jasper laughed. "You say that about every fashion faze."

"Not all of them! I hope the seventies fashions _never_ come back! Polyester? Ew! And guys wore these hideous "leisure suits"! What were _those_ about?"

"And shag carpet! I never actually had any, but I saw pictures of my mom's house when she was our age. It looked like the ground needed a hair cut!" Riley laughed.

"EW!" Alice cried. We usually laughed at the fashions of the past and present. If it were up to us, it would be the early 2000's forever.

"Those were the best styles." Alice said.

Alice often played Barbie Bella with me, dressing me up to see how she could change the latest styles to make them actually decent.

Besides staying with the fashions just so we wouldn't look weird, we mostly stayed in our own world. Technology improved, but mostly just modern medicine. Of course, that didn't apply to us, so we didn't pay much attention to it. Our lives centered around hunting and our mates mostly.

Speaking of which, as time went on, I became more and more in love with Riley. Jasper had been right; I hadn't been in _love_ with him at the beginning, but he was my life now. He was my everything. I wouldn't be surprised if I loved him more than he loved me. I knew he loved me too, though. He showered me with gifts, though I always refused to take them. No one should spend any money on me, even if we did have a basically limitless amount.

We did pay attention to the stock market, considering that's how we got all of our money. We didn't really care about the money, but we needed it when we lived in society. We never aimed to get wealthy, it just sort of happens when our sister has the tendency to see rises and falls in the stock market, especially when it starts accumulating over the years. We'll move into the forest for a couple of years, and when me move back into society, we've accumulated much more money. Some of that is from putting all of our money in banks and collecting interest years later, as well as the fact that Jasper and Alice were rich anyway, way before Riley and I came along. I wasn't positive how it all worked (Jasper took care of everything like that, from money to 'legal' documents). I just knew that we had _money_ and Riley and Alice really knew how to spend it.

I was glad that out of all the jewelry Riley bough me (_without_ my consent), he _never_ bought me a ring. I wasn't sure why I didn't want to get married; I knew I was absolutely in love with him. I just had it somewhere, engrained in my mind, that marriage was something that, though not bad, should be entered into with extreme caution. I had it in my mind that marriage was not something for 18 year olds, even those that were technically much older than that. I would be forever young, and in my mind, forever too immature for such a commitment. I tried to reason with myself. I _was_ older than 18. Technically I was nearly 30. I was older beyond my years. I loved Riley with my whole heart. Yet those reasons still didn't seem like enough. I constantly asked myself what was wrong with me. Why couldn't I bring myself to be okay with the thought of marrying Riley? Of course, I never had an answer for myself, and probably wouldn't anytime soon.

Alice also started wondering about marriage. She asked constantly if she could plan the wedding, and I always told her I wasn't having a wedding. It usually took both mine and Jasper's efforts to calm Alice down, she would get so worked up.

I was pleased with Riley's stance on marriage as well. He never even mentioned it, wouldn't discuss it, and that was perfectly fine with me.

Considering I don't remember my life before, I'd say my life was…not "normal", but not uber exciting. We live and loved just like all the humans. Not much about our daily lives changed over the years, though time passes extremely quickly. A decade doesn't exactly feel like 10 years. Maybe that's because we knew we had forever and 10 years out of forever really isn't that much.

Alice sometimes pondered aloud about that "family" that she once saw.

"I just can't wait until it happens!" She squealed.

"It's been a really long time, Alice. Your visions have never taken this long to come true. Are you sure it's still going to happen?" Jasper asked.

"Definitely. Nothing has changed."

Jasper would sigh and nod. He stopped believing it was going to happen, but didn't want to upset Alice. He was right, it had never taken this long for a vision to come true, and the more time passed, the less likely it seemed it would happen. We didn't want to tell this to her, though.

At times, I secretly didn't want this family that she talked about. My life was perfectly fine how it was. I had a mate, a brother, and a sister. I didn't need – or want – more. Too many people might upset our balance. Besides, our coven was twice as big as a normal coven was already! Any more vampires and people might start noticing.

Even though Alice said they were vegetarians too, I wasn't sure. We had never met another vegetarian vampire, ever. I knew we were freaks of the vampire world, but it sometimes crossed my mind that we were against the laws of nature. It completely went against our instincts to drink animal blood, not human. The pull of a humans scent was intoxicating, and extremely difficult to resist. It took everything we had not to succumb to the thirst. We had to be masochists, surely. There was no other reason to deny ourselves so much.

No, there was another reason. Sometimes I forgot, but that other reason was there. We weren't monsters. We weren't serial killers. These people, our would-be meals, had lives, thoughts, feelings. It would kind of be like cannibalism, to eat them. Of course, they were humans, and we were vampires, but the knowledge that you used to be like that, you used to be a human yourself, puts that thought of cannibalism there. So every time my thoughts strayed from my approved diet, I'd remember that.

One thing that _had_ changed since I was a newborn; my power. My power itself hadn't changed, but my control over it did. I learned how to control the powers I was exposed to, being empathetic and psychic **(No, no one knows about Riley that sneaky little f*****)**. With help from Jasper and Alice, I could control the powers just as well as they could. I also learned how to use my powers even when I'm not around them. I could call the powers back to me so I could use them whenever I wanted or needed them, which was extremely useful.

My life was good, great, perfect. Especially with Riley by my side.


	29. 10 Years Later With the Cullen's

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Whew! They full Emo Edward chapter! I gotta say, it's now one of my favorite chapters. I love it, and I hope you guys will too. I knew it was going to be short though...but I already have the next chapter typed and it's longer! I promise!  
**

Chapter 27: 10 Years Later With the Cullen's

Song: Here Without You by 3 Doors Down

A hundred days have made me older

Since the last time that I saw your pretty face

A thousand lies have made me colder

And I don't think I can look at this the same

But all the miles that separate

Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight it's only you and me, yeah

The miles just keep rollin'

As the people leave their way to say hello

I've heard this life is overrated

But I hope that it gets better as we go, oh yeah yeah

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know and anywhere I go

It gets hard but it won't take away my love

And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done

It gets hard but it won't take away my love, whoa

I'm here without you baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight girl it's only you and me, yeah oh yeah oh

Edward POV

My life was not good. No matter how hard Emmett tried, I was almost never in a good mood. I wasn't mad or angry, just sad or depressed. I couldn't get Bella out of my mind. I guess I didn't exactly try to, though. I held on to my human memories as hard as I could, until they were ingrained in my mind and played over and over in my head, like a movie, even when I didn't want it to. Even though most of my memories were good ones (because Bella was there), they reminded me that what I wanted – and needed – most was something that I couldn't have. I could only see her, hear her, touch her in my memories. They reminded me that I would never have Bella again. Ever.

My memories told me this daily, and ten years slowly passed. I felt all 10 years. I felt all 120 months. I felt all 3652 days. I felt all 87,658 hours. I felt all 5,259,487 minutes. I felt all 315,569,260 seconds. I knew from everyone's thoughts that they didn't. This was barely a dent in the time that they had and will continue to have on this world. But not me. I had nothing to live for, so every minute felt like it should be my last. I _wanted_ them to be my last. But they continued coming, the minutes. I kept living.

Even though my life was agony, I tried not to show it. I'd play Emmett's little games and plaster a fake smile on my face for the duration. I'd still play the piano for Esme. I forced myself to read and study, to try to keep my mind off of things. There was always a section of my mind that was always on Bella, though; a part of my mind that never got relief from the depression.

Music eventually stopped helping. It used to be able to take my mind other places, away from the torture. But it came to the point where every single song reminded me of a different memory with Bella. It was like getting punched in the face twice. Once being the Memory Movie always playing in the back of my mind, twice being the memories that come to the surface when I listen to music.

And yet I put myself through that anyway. I can't live without music, and I don't want to forget Bella.

I thought of ways I could kill myself. I had no reason to live, and everyday seemed like torture. Unfortunately, the only way to kill a vampire is to tear them apart and burn the pieces. I couldn't exactly do that by myself, and none of the Cullen's would help me.

Sometimes when Carlisle would catch a glimpse of how depressed I really was, he'd think the word "Volturi", though this must have been a slip because every time his thoughts trailed that way, he'd quickly shield them so I couldn't find out what this "Volturi" meant.

I tried to train myself to stay out of everyone's heads, but it was extremely difficult to do, and it was never completely silent.

I felt like even more of an outcast because I was the only family member with powers. Carlisle said that powers weren't rare. Not common, but not unheard of. He's met some other vampire's with powers. He said one, Aro, had an ability like mine, but much more powerful and refined. He also met one vampire, Marcus, that could sense relationships. He mentioned a few others as well.

It made me feel better that I wasn't the _only_ one to have a power, but it still pushed me out a little in our family. Nobody actually _did_ anything to make me feel that was, but with as much free time as I have, I got to thinking about it.

Thinking about things so much, it got to the point where I was becoming paranoid. It wasn't like some people's paranoia, where they think everyone is looking at them and talking about them. With my mind reading, I knew they weren't (well, sometimes I did catch people looking and thinking about me, but I knew this was because I was different. "Handsome", "Hot", some thought. If only they knew what I really was…) No, my paranoia was about Bella. I saw her everywhere. Every brunette, I imagined was her. None compared to her beauty, but always in that quick glance, I saw her face, her body. Sometimes I'd even call out Bella's name and chase after the brunette, until I realized it wasn't really Bella. _Of course. It's never really Bella. Bella's dead._ I'd think to myself.

For a few years in the middle of that first decade, I left the Cullen's. I'd go to cities, hide in the day, and come out at night. I'd wander the dark alleyways of LA and other such big cities. I'd stalk the dark, looking for criminals. I'd always eventually find a male or something trying to murder or rape an innocent female. The criminals were my meals. "The dark avenger" one woman called me. I would never drink the human while the victims were still there, though.

"Oh, thank you sir!" The female would cry while the male (whose neck I would snap) lay dead on the ground.

"Dark alleyways are no place for anyone. Predators wait here for people like you." I'd tell the female.

"Oh, I won't come down here again! Thank you! Is there anything I can do for you?" She'd ask. _No unless you want to be dessert._

"No, nothing. Just get yourself home. I'll call the police." I would say. She'd thank me once more as she ran away. Of course I wouldn't call the police, I'd have my meal.

Not all the females would react like this though. Some would scream and run. Those were the ones that could see the monster inside me. Those were the ones I liked.

Though, not all of the victims I could get to in time. Some were already dead when I found them. I'd smell the blood. At that point, the murderer was usually taking any money or jewelry off their victims or already gone. Those times, I'd have them both. It made me feel a little bad to eat the victim, but if they were already dead, why waste good blood?

This lifestyle eventually got to me. Each human drunken was a seed in me. Eventually the seeds added up, and started to grow. The evil started to grow. I could feel the monster in me. The true monster that didn't care if the meal was an innocent or a criminal. Every day the monster rose a little more to the surface. Soon I realized I couldn't continue on "living" like that. I went back to the Cullen's, to my family. They welcomed me back with open arms, and got me back to my "vegetarian" status. I swore to never taste human blood again. I knew that one more drop of human blood could me the monster rise to the surface with a swift and fiery vengeance. I can't say I was never tempted; living among humans, I was tempted everyday. But since that brief time in my life, I never face in to the temptation.

I got better in that sense. I kept my demons down. But my depression because of my missing Bella never weakened its hold on me. I always felt her absence and I still wanted to give up, to die.

My life was awful agony, torture. Especially with Bella absent from my side.

**A/N: Haha, did anyone catch my **_**Angel**_** reference? **


	30. First Sight

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: You silly gooses! There were more votes for Emo Edward when I put the poll up, I don't do that, I get good reviews. Then when I _do _do it, y'all are saying to get past the angst! Mixed messages confuse me!!!! But I hope you guys like this chapter better. Plus it's longer!!!!! Not by a lot, but still!**

**Ok, this is an extremely important chapter. I'm kinda worried what you guys will think. Ok, _worried_ isn't the best word...I like the chapter and I want you guys to like it too.**

**Gosh, I feel so out of it lately (stupid finals)...hopefully my writing doesn't reflect that. :(  
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Chapter 28: First Sight

Song: Drops of Jupiter by Train

Now that she's back in the atmosphere

With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey, hey, hey

She acts like summer and walks like rain

Reminds me that there's time to change, hey, hey, hey, hey

Since the return from her stay on the moon

She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey, hey, hey

hey, hey, hey, hey

Tell me did you sail across the sun

Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded

And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star

One without a permanent scar

And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Now that she's back from that soul vacation

Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey, hey

mmmm.....

She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo

Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey, hey, hey, hey

yea...

Now that she's back in the atmosphere

I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol jane

Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet

Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day

And head back to the milky way

And tell me, did Venus blow your mind

Was it everything you wanted to find

And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken

Your best friend always sticking up for you, even when I know you're wrong

Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone

Conversation

The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet

Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day

And head back toward the milky way

Tell me did you sail across the sun

Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded

And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star

One without a permanent scar

And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself

nah nah nah nah nah nah nah

nah nah nah nah nah nah nah

And did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day

nah nah nah nah nah nah

nah nah nah nah nah nah

And did you fall for a shooting star

Fall for a shooting star

nah nah nah nah nah nah

nah nah nah nah nah nah

Are you loney looking for yourself out there

Bella POV

It was just another day. Another perfect day. At this point we were living in the secluded forests, keeping to ourselves. It was just another day when our lives changed forever.

The vision of our "family" finally happened. Alice saw the family. All of us together, meeting. She saw all of their faces, heard all of their names. But not me. Usually we had the same vision. But not this time. Of course, I didn't learn this until after. No, my vision was of one person, and one person alone.

I saw it as though I was standing right in front of them, shaking their hand. Their shocked, golden eyes were excited, but trying to suppress that with a cool, calm mask. Their white, marble skin, just like mine, sparkled lightly in the sun. Their straight, perfect nose sniffed the air subtly. They raised their big, strong hand to their bronze, tousled hair, messing it up. Their defined jaw unhinged to speak the words, "Nice to…_meet_ you. I'm Edward…Cullen." That's where my vision cut off. I gasped for air I didn't need as I was brought back to the present. Jasper, Alice, and Riley were all standing in front of me, not two feet away.

"Bella? You had a different vision than me, didn't you?" Alice asked. "What did you see?"

"A man. A vampire. Named Edward Cullen. That's it."

"That's it?" Alice asked, disappointed. I nodded.

"Why? Isn't that what you saw too?" I asked.

"Well, sort of. I saw a whole bunch of vampires. Our family! There were five of them. Three males, two females. By the way they were standing I could tell who was with who. I also heard them introduce themselves, so I know their names. There's Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, and…Edward. We were all introducing ourselves, and he was introducing himself to you. That was my vision. I wonder why I got the whole picture and you only saw a part of it…" Alice said.

I shrugged. I honestly had no idea.

"Do you know when we'll meet them?" Jasper asked. I looked at Alice. I hadn't seen enough to know that.

"Well, by the position of the sun, I'd say it was about one in the afternoon. And, actually, we met in that small field about a mile east in the center of the forest." Alice said.

"So, it'll be within the next few days, there." Jasper said. We were getting ready to move again next week, to another place in society. If we were meeting them around here, it would be before we moved.

"Wait. Guys, look at the sun. It's 12:45 in the afternoon. What if it's today?" Riley asked.

"Your right!" Alice cried, running east, towards the field. We knew there was no stopping her, so we followed. Just as we merged into the field clearing, so did they.

They all stopped short, not expecting to see anyone. Alice kept running until she was right in front of who looked like the leader, a blond male. We followed, lagging behind a little. Riley grabbed my hand as we made our way over there.

"Hi!" Alice said enthusiastically. "I'm your new daughter, Carlisle!" She said, sticking out her hand to the blond male, who, like the others, looked dumbfounded. She grabbed Carlisle's hand from his side, not waiting for him to offer it. When she was done shaking his hand, she turned to the caramel haired female standing a little behind him. "Hi!" Alice said again. "I'm also _your_ new daughter, Esme!"

"Who are you?" A blond female asked. All of the Cullen's were mesmerized by Alice's winsome attitude, not even looking up at us yet.

"Hi, Rosalie! We're going to be best friends too! I finally got a willing shopping partner!"

A big, burly man standing next to Rosalie shook with laughter.

"What's so funny, Emmett?" Alice asked.

"Nothing, I've just never met a pixie before. It's kinda fun."

"Ha ha, what a jokester." Alice rolled her eyes. This made Emmett laugh harder.

"Um, excuse me?" Esme coughed, trying to get Alice's attention.

"Yes?" Alice beamed at her.

"Who exactly…are you? You seem to know _us_ fairly well, but we don't even know your name." She said.

Alice slapped her forehead dramatically. "Oh, how _rude_ of me! I'm Alice, this is my mate Jasper." She said, pointing to Jasper. "This is Riley." All eyes turned to Riley. "And that's his mate, Bella." She said, pointing to me. I could feel everyone's eyes on me. All of the Cullen's faces held pure shock. They were all speechless, with their jaws dropped. This behavior I didn't understand at all.

"Um, nice to meet you." I said, waving tentatively. Emmett slowly raised his hand to wave back but Rosalie slapped it down. It was silent. I took a taste of the feelings in the air. The Cullen's faces showed exactly what they were feeling; complete and utter shock as they continued to stare at me. Jasper, Alice, and Riley were starting to get confused and kept looking between the Cullen's and me. I squeezed Riley's hand for comfort, which he squeezed back. Jasper nodded his head, motioning for me to step forward. I let go of Riley's hand, let go of my anchor that was keeping me sane at the moment, and stepped forward in front of Edward. Something drew me to him first. Their eyes followed my every move.

"Hi, I'm Bella."

He stuck out his hand first, and I grabbed it. It shocked a little at the touch. He sniffed the air, probably to memorize my scent. I let go of his hand, which he ran through his unkempt hair. "Nice to…_meet_ you. I'm Edward…Cullen." He said. I smiled. The first words this coven has ever spoke to me.

"Nice to meet you." I grinned, and introduced myself to the other Cullen's. After the most awkward moment of my life, I walked back over to Riley.

"That was weird." Riley said under his breath

"Tell me about it." I mumbled.

* * *

Edward POV

It was one of those times again. Moving day. Again. We were moving to another part of Oregon. We were on the road, each driving our own cars. The U-Haul truck would be a day behind us. We had a huge house picked out and bought. Much more room than we would ever use. Not quite a mansion, but no ordinary house. We weren't driving very far, just a few states over (we were coming from Michigan), but I could hear Emmett already complaining that he wanted to go hunt. We were only halfway there, in the middle of South Dakota.

"Maybe we should stop here in the forests and hunt." I said, a little louder so everyone could hear me over the car engines and the sound of the road racing by. I heard them all agree, and we pulled over.

"So what wild animals do you think are around here?" Emmett said, getting out of his jeep.

"I don't know Emmett, but I'm sure you'll find _something_ to play with." I said, rolling my eyes.

"Aw, cheer up, buddy! I'm sure you'll find something to play with here too!" He said, clapping me on the shoulder.

"Gee, thanks." I murmured and made my way into the trees. It was a fairly large forest, quite a few miles in area. We all knew the best food would be more in the center of the woods, so that's where we headed.

A few miles from the middle of the forest I heard whispers. Not schizophrenic whispers, though in my condition I wouldn't be surprised if I started hearing those too. No, these were thoughts. Thoughts other than my family's.

As we got closer, I heard them more distinctly.

_This throws a wrench into the wheels of the plan…_ a male "voice" thought.

_Alice was right. We _are _going to have a family. I can't believe it…_ another male thought. I could tell this vampire was older, more mature.

_The Cullen's are coming! The Cullen's are coming! That Cullen's are coming!_ a female's "voice" squealed.

"Carlisle, I have to tell you. There's something in the middle of the forest." I whispered so the vampire's we were unknowingly approaching wouldn't hear me.

"Oh boy! What is it? A bear? I call it!" Emmett said and darted faster.

"No! Emmett!" I called, speeding up to catch him. I heard Carlisle, Esme, and Rosalie's thoughts of confusion as they sped to keep up with us.

My distraction made it so my concentration on keeping the voices out, broke. It was now as if they were all yelling at me.

The unfamiliar squeaky female voice really was screaming in her head so her thoughts were the loudest.

_3…2…1!_

Right as she thought _1_, we burst into an opening in the forest. A field. With a coven of vampires coming out of the forest on the other side.

We all stopped in shock, even though I already knew they were there.

_That's not a bear…_ Emmett thought. I rolled my eyes.

They were all thinking our names, trying to fit a name with a face. Except for the tiny female's thoughts. She already knew who's name fit with who's face. _Who are they? How do they know us? Or at least know our names?_ I thought.

My questions weren't answered. But more arose as the female – a tiny, black haired female – ran up to Carlisle, who was in the front.

"Hi! I'm your new daughter, Carlisle!" She said happily. _What?_ All of our thoughts said at the same time. She moved on to everyone else, proving that she really did know all about us.

"Um, excuse me?" Esme finally spoke up.

"Yes?" The strange vampire asked.

"Who exactly…are you? You seem to know _us_ fairly well but we don't even know your name." She said.

The pixie slapped her forehead. "Oh how _rude_ of me! I'm Alice, this is my mate Jasper." I looked over to see a tall, blond vampire. This was the mature male I had heard before. "This is Riley." Riley was the younger male. "And that's his mate, Bella."

All heads shot up to a female that I hadn't noticed before. No one had. The little pixie had had our full attention. But not anymore. We all knew the name "Bella" all too well.

Why were my hallucinations of Bella coming up now? Why was I suddenly seeing Bella standing right in front of me?

No. This hallucination was different. Usually my normal vision returned once I got a look to see that Bella wasn't really there. But this was failing me this time. Bella was still in front of me.

But that wasn't the only difference in this hallucination. In all my previous ones, Bella was always human. I never wanted to see her like the monster that I was. I never wanted to see her fight that monster that was always on the inside, trying to break free.

But here she was. Pale, cold skin. Gold eyes. _Well, at least she hasn't let the monster within take over_. Well, of course! Never in my daydreaming would I _ever_ imagine her with red eyes.

But she moved. My hallucination Bella moved. And based off of everyone else's thoughts, they saw her too. I stayed out of everyone's minds, though. They were all breaking down in shock and I didn't want a front row seat for that mess when I had my own to deal with.

This hallucination wasn't a hallucination at all. This was Bella. The real Bella. I wasn't dreaming. I wasn't dead, in heaven (or hell, for that matter). Bella…was alive. And standing in front of me.

All my memories decided to come flooding back to me at this second. Every single thought and memory I had of Bella was drowning me. Different scenes flashed in front of my eyes, ever moving and changing. But the one thing that was the same was that Bella was in all of them. Not only that, but my eyes never left the real Bella that was standing in front of me.

She was confused and shy.

Suddenly another thing struck me. I couldn't hear a single word from her. Not in thought. Not at all. _What_ was going on? I was like she wasn't there! But she was! Everyone else's thoughts proved she was!

I was seeing, but my belief was faltering. I had to touch her. I had to feel her in front of me.

As if she read my mind **(which she didn't at this point. She doesn't know she can do that yet)**, she walked up to me and stuck her hand out, asking me to shake hands.

Shake hands? I didn't want to shake hands! I wanted to hold her and never let go! I wanted to kiss her until the world stopped turning! What was happening?

"Hi, I'm Bella. Nice to meet you." She said with a nervous smile while averting her eyes.

_Nice to meet you._

_Nice to _meet_ you._

She doesn't remember! Of course!

This cut me deeper than any of my other pain over did. This as like someone ripped open the stitches of my chest, placed a bomb where my heart was, and blew it up, just to make sure there weren't any remnants of my heart, not even a place to _put_ my heart, if I ever got it back.

I wasn't dead to Bella. I had never _existed_.

"Nice to…_meet_ you. I'm Edward…Cullen." I managed to get out.

She walked up to the other Cullen's and introduced herself.

How could this happen? How could she be alive? How could she be standing in front of me?

No, that didn't matter. Just the fact that she _was _here was the only important part. Now I just needed her to remember me and have her as mine and me as hers. How it was before. Only we would never be apart again. I had to get her to remember. I had to make her fall in love with me again. I knew the Cullen's would help me with this. And then after we were with each other again, together we would find out what happened to her the night of her "death". Our life would be bliss again.

She stepped back to where she was standing with the male I remembered being Riley. They held hands.

She had a _mate._

"That was weird." Riley whispered. I wanted to rip his face off. How dare _anyone_ touch Bella!

"Tell me about it." Bella whispered back.

The world hated me. The world wanted my existence to suffer like nothing before. All my plans of our perfect life together just went up in burning flames and disintegrated before my eyes.

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**A/N: I hope you all liked it! I really want to hear what you guys think of this chapter especially because it's such a big turning point, so _please_ review!**

**Time for Emmy's GIANT AUTHOR'S NOTE OF THE WEEK!**

**Ok, I have a little case of writers black. I know where I want to go with the story and everything, I'm just no sure about the next few chapters. I have an idea about the next chapter, I'm just having trouble deciding who's POV it will be in. **

**So I need your guys's help. I'm going to put a poll on my profile of all the characters that will be in the next chapter. You guys vote on who's POV you want to hear. Last time I put a poll up, I got about 7 reviews. 3 of those were on the poll, the others in reviews/PMs. **

**7? That's just a little sad. I know of at least 60 people that have put this story on their story alert. I don't know how many actually read it, though. (Jessica will put stories on her story alert but never read them. Our email inbox is full of over 70 (as of now) unread chapters of fan fictions she's put on her story alert. She's crazy, I could never stop a story right in the middle...)**

**7 out of 60 voted. That's insane!!! I know some people don't like to review, and that's cool (I almost never review. I'm such a hypocite, right?), but could you guys, as a favor to me, go to my profile, look at the poll at the top, and vote? Just for who's POV the next chapter will be in? Please?**

**How about a little incentive... Or bribery... Or is it a threat? Hmmm...well, whatever you want to call it, I'm going to do it. I won't post (or write) the next chapter until I have _at least_ 15 votes on the poll. If you vote through a review and tell me why you want that POV, I'll count it as 1.5 poll votes. **

**15 poll votes or 10 review votes. Or a mix. Yeah, it'll probably be a mix. And that's awesome too. **

**So can y'all do that? Vote? Just once? **

**The faster you vote, the faster the next chapter gets up! **

**Ugh, I hate when authors say that...I am _such_ a _hypocrite_...**

**Anyway, GO REVIEW!!! THEN VOTE!!! OR DO IT ALL IN ONE!!!! YIPPIE!!!! MULTITASKING!!!!! **

**Oh, ok, while I'm writing a ginormous authors note, I'll just mention this real quick. I got a web site. Have I mentioned that before? I don't remember and I don't really wanna go look. But I also got a Twitter account. **

**How beast is that?**

**Very beast, I'd say.**

**So you can go see what I'm doing daily. Fun. I know you guys are curious!!! I won't bite, I promise!**

**Goodness, this authors note is as long as some of my chapters...  
**

**~Emmy**


	31. Where Do We Go From Here?

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Because I got so many people telling me to hurry up, I'm not going to revise or edit this. And it's 10:30 at night, I have to get up really early tomorrow, and I'm going through review-withdrawal!!! So I'm putting this up now. Not my best work, but really, does it matter? My goal for this story is to finish it (because I never finish any piece of writing I start). I'm going to try so much harder on my next story. I promise. Plus I want you guys to read the next chapter! I think Emmett has something to say about Bella's past… and I can't wait to hear what you think! Aaaahh I'm so excited!**

**It's a little strange when the chapter title and the song title are the same. The chapter title actually came first. Then I remembered that that was a song title in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical episode "Once More, With Feeling". I looked for it on Itunes but it wasn't there. I did, however, find a lot more songs with that title. So I Googled it, not thinking I'd really find anything that fit. BUT I DID! One of the first ones I clicked on was this one (by Live) and I clicked on it because I love Live! (My favorite of theirs is "Lightning Crashes".) Anyway, it's PERFECT! I'm like, "Holy crow! Could I **_**be**_** any **_**luckier???"**_** I don't think I could. **

**And, by popular demand, Edward's POV! It takes off right where it left off so you might to go back and read the last few lines or something.**

**~Emmy

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Chapter 29: Where Do We Go From Here?

Song: Where Do We Go From Here by Live

I wanted a mountain, you gave me a sea

I wanted a hurricane, you gave me a breeze

I wanted to run, made me stand there and breathe

I wanted to dream, you made me sleep

I wanted to touch the bottom, but it was too deep

I wanted a revolution, you said I was already free

Oh, yeah

Where do we go from here?

Now the day is gone

How do we face our fears

With nothing in our hearts, baby?

Where do we go from here?

Now the night has come

I wanted to touch your mind and your heart

I wanted to find a new place to start

I wanted to kiss your every part

Oh, yeah

So baby, don't leave me now as you turn to the flag

They get shot through the holes, but you're still alive

Like you're too close to death to ever really die

Oh, yeah

Where do we go from here?

Now the day is gone

How do we face our fears

With nothing in our hearts, baby?

Where do we go from here?

Now the night has come

How do we face our fears

With nothing in our hearts?

Nothing

Why won't you listen to me?

I never meant you no harm

I only wanted to be free

All I want is to be free

Where do we go from here?

Now the day is gone

How do we face our fears

With nothing in our hearts, baby?

Where do we go from here?

Now the night has come

How do we face our fears?

Oh, yeah

Where do we go?

Where do we go?

Where do we go?

Where do we go?

Where do we go?

Where do we go?

Edward POV

I thought for the longest time that all I ever wanted in life was to have Bella back; for her to be alive. I didn't have to have her, but as long as she was alive, I'd be happy. That's not exactly the case anymore. When I was first turned into a vampire ten years ago, when Bella was still human, I had been thinking about her moving on with her life; finding another man. I thought that if he made her happy, I should be happy. I thought I could handle it.

I can't.

As I watched her take that bastard's hand, all I could feel was my world crumbling down. Alice had said they were mates when she first introduced Bella, but that little fact had disappeared. It got lost in translation as I tried to comprehend Bella standing in front of me, alive and breathing (okay, she wasn't _technically_ breathing, but you know what I mean).

When thy clasped their hands together, though, realization hit me like a ton of bricks. That's when realization hit everyone else, too.

_Oh my God!_

_Their hands!_

_She has a mate!_

_How is this possible?_

I was thinking all of that and more.

We all stood in silence for what seemed like hours. Well, silence for everyone else. In my head, there was so much noise it sounded like a riot.

But finally Alice broke the silence, her thoughts very confused about the current situation.

"So…we've been waiting for you all for a long time." Alice said.

"How long is a long time?" Carlisle asked.

"Ten years."

We all did a double take. _Ten years?_ How could they be waiting for us for _ten years_?

"What do you mean 'ten years'?" Carlisle asked.

"I mean that I had a vision of you guys ten years ago and I needed another to find you. I had that second vision today. And here you all are!" Alice explained.

"Wait, wait, wait. Visions? What are you talking about?" Emmett asked.

"I'm psychic. I have visions of the future." Alice said.

Everyone stood in shock again.

"Why are you guys so dumbfounded? It's not like you've never met anyone with abilities before. Edward can read minds. It's not so different." Alice said. I saw Bella look surprised.

"How did you know –" I started.

"I'm psychic. Don't you listen?" Alice rolled her eyes but had a playful grin on her face.

"Well, it's just we don't meet many others with abilities. You and Edward are the only ones in the last ten years." Carlisle said.

"Oh, no we're not. You're forgetting Jasper and Bella." Alice said with a proud smile.

We stood in shock once again.

_The day started out so normal…_ Emmett thought.

"Jasper and…Bella…have powers too?" Esme asked.

Alice grinned again. "Yup!" She turned to Jasper. "Go ahead." She motioned for him to talk.

"Well…I'm empathetic." He said hesitantly. "I can feel and manipulate everyone's emotions."

"And…Bella?" I whispered. Alice looked at me curiously but turned to Bella and motioned for her to explain.

"Mine's a little more complicated. I can…take other people's powers." She said.

"You _take_ other powers?" Rosalie asked.

"Well…yes. If I'm around someone with a power, I have that power too. For example, because I've been around Alice and Jasper, I'm now psychic and empathetic. Now that I've been around Edward," She motioned towards me, "I can read minds, apparently."

_Oh great, exactly what I need; _another_ person in my head._ Rosalie thought. Typical Rosalie, thinking about herself at a time like this.

"That doesn't explain why I can't read _your_ mind, though." It took me a minute (and everyone's stares in my direction) to realize I had said that out loud.

"You can't read her mind?" Carlisle asked.

I shook my head.

"Is there something wrong with me?" She asked.

_There could _never_ be anything wrong with you._ I thought.

"Why do you say that?" Bella cocked her head to the side in confusion. My eyes got wide. Did she really hear that?

"Of course I heard that, I'm standing right here. Didn't everyone else here that?" She said.

"No, Bella. Those were thoughts." I said out loud, for everyone else's benefit.

"Ooooh. It's so hard to tell!" She said.

"You get used to it. The difference in voice and thought becomes more apparent with a little time." I said casually.

_Time? Are they staying with us?_ Rosalie thought.

"Well, yes, but that's not relevant to learning my new power." Bella answered Rosalie's unspoken question.

"Yes what?" Emmett asked.

"They're staying with us." I said.

"Yes, Alice has this pre-conceived notion that we will all be one big happy family." Riley rolled his eyes. I wanted to rip his throat out. _No, no. Don't think like that. He hasn't done anything to deserve that. _Bella looked at me, confused and curious, but didn't say anything.

"I'm actually more interested in Bella's second part of the answer. How is time not relevant to learning you new power?" Carlisle guessed Rosalie's question.

"That's part of my ability. I just have to be around a power once for me to have it. Even if I'm not around the person that has that ability, I can call it back to me at any time." Bella explained.

"Remarkable." Carlisle was completely amazed.

Bella shrugged. "It gets annoying sometimes. When I'm not around the person, I don't have the power unless I ask for it. I have to call it back. But if I'm around the person, it's automatically there. I say it's annoying because I wish I could turn it off, even when the person is around, sometimes. Jasper's power is the hardest. Always being in a climate of emotions can be hard for your own emotions. We'll never buy a house near a hospital, cemetery, or nursing home." Bella explained. Jasper nodded in agreement.

"Bella, you looked surprised when Alice said Edward could read minds. Didn't you notice before?" Carlisle asked.

"No, not at all. Of course, to me, speaking and thinking sound the same, so if I had paid attention I might have noticed. I was focusing a lot on the emotions of everyone, though."

_I wonder what she's figured out so far._ Emmett thought.

_Has she realized anything based off of our emotions and thoughts yet?_ Esme thought.

"What am I supposed to have realized?" Bella asked. Esme looked taken off guard.

"Uhh…nothing…nothing at all dear." If anyone could see through a lie, it was a mind reader, and Bella saw through Esme's pitiful attempt like glass. She didn't say anything more though, it seemed she was too confused.

"Wait, can we go back to the part where they're staying with us?" Rosalie's thoughts were purely selfish.

It was silent. We were all waiting for Alice to speak (she seemed like she had a lot to say on such subjects) but she was having another vision. This time about the house we had just bought. She was picking out her room

_And I'll get the one with a view at the end of the hall. Bella and Riley will be the room next door. If she's not close by, she might slip some awful clothes into the wardrobe of hers, I gotta keep a close eye on her._ I saw Bella roll her eyes at this. _It doesn't have a view, but they won't mind. Edward can have the room next to Bella and Riley because I want Rosalie and Emmett as far away from mine and Jasper's room as possible. I know Jasper doesn't want to _always_ be horny, and with Rosalie and Emmett's emotions…_

"Alice, you're forgetting the rooms across the hallway. People can live there too." I said. I realized then that I had broken the awkward silence following Rosalie's question and only Alice and Bella knew what I was talking about.

"No I didn't. The room directly across from mine is my closet, the one directly across from Bella's is her closet, and so forth."

"And all the other bedrooms in the house? We don't all have to be so close together." I was thinking about being away from Rosalie and Emmett too. They can have the basement…

"Well, Carlisle needs an office, I need a design studio, Jasper and Bella need a quiet place to read, Emmett needs a video game room, Esme needs a room she can put all her architecture designs in, and you need a music room. With bedrooms, closets, and special needs rooms, the total comes to 15 rooms. I know the house you bought has 15 rooms. There's no where else to put our dear sex-addicted siblings."

"Well I don't need a whole _room_ for a closet. That gives us an extra room." Bella said.

"Oh no you don't! You need that room/closet more than anyone! Well, besides me of course."

"Alice, I don't have that many clothes. I barely have enough clothes to fill half of a closet." Bella rolled her eyes.

"Oh don't worry about that, we'll take care of your clothing problem. Or lack-there-of."

Rosalie's face lit up.

Alice nodded at Rosalie. "I knew you'd want to go shopping with us! Can we stay?"

"Well…I suppose I can handle four more people if I get two shopping partners out of it. We definitely have the room." Rosalie shrugged. I just rolled my eyes. Even if Rosalie _wasn't_ okay with it, I wasn't letting Bella leave anytime soon.

Bella snapped her head in my direction. Crap, I'm going to have to keep my thoughts away from my past. The last thing she needs is an ex-boyfriend living in the same house as her and her mate. She seems happy; I need to keep it that way. I'll be careful and make sure she doesn't find out. For now, I blocked my thoughts by counting up the places of pi.

"I'm glad we have your approval, Rosalie –" Alice started.

"And Edwards." Bella added. Alice looked at me, surprised by the tone in Bella's voice. Bella was starting to get frustrated, it seemed.

"Ok…and…Edward's…" Alice said, confused. "But we need Carlisle and Esme's."

Carlisle turned to Esme, asked her answer.

"Oh, honey, of course! I would love to have two more daughters and two more sons. My vote is yes." Esme smiled at us.

That left it up to Carlisle. His vote was definitely most important.

He hesitated. "Alice, if you're psychic, don't you already know what I'm going to say?" He asked.

She smiled. "Right after you decided, yes. I do know what you're going to say."

"Then you have your answer."

"Yay!" She grinned and jumped up and down in excitement.

"Is that a yes or a no?" Emmett asked.

"It's a yes, moron." Rosalie snapped.

_Good, that means we have Bella back._ He thought.

Even though I couldn't read her thoughts, I knew she was hanging on that last word. 'Back'. She looked even more confused than before. I prayed for Emmett not to think anything else that could be compromising, and he didn't.

"Oh my goodness this is so amazing! Jasper! We finally have our family!" Alice hugged Jasper tightly.

"Yes, we finally have all of our family." Bella said and smiled sweetly up at Riley, who smiled back. Riley's smile seemed off. I could tell Bella didn't notice. But I did. I noticed. Riley better watch his back. I know he's not right. He can't be.

* * *

**A/N: Hmm, I thought this chapter was longer...anyway... **

**I just want to say, "HI RUBY!" She's my only friend out in the real world that is reading my stories (Jessica won't even read this because she says it's too sad). And I really wanted to say thank you Ruby! I already have told her this, but now everyone knows how awesome Ruby is! I might have mentioned her before. I probably referred to her as James. Because she is James. No matter what she says. **

**Ruby, you are James. And now it's official. SUCK IT!!! Haha, just kidding! She's trying feverishly to get me to agree that she's Alice. I'm pondering it.**

**LOVE YOU ALL!**

**~Emmy**

**p.s. FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER!!!!! **

**I'm Emmy56! **

**Twitter is AWESOME! (And free. And much better than Myspace or Facebook. I'm just saying...) For all those people that are like "Write faster! Why aren't you writing??" I am!!! And I say so on Twitter! "Half way done with the next chapter", "Having trouble with this part", etc. So if you say stuff like "Update now or I'll shoot you!" I'm going to tell you to go to my Twitter and to please not shoot me.**

…

**TWITTER!!!**

**Go now.**

**DO IT NOW!**

**~Emmy(56)**


	32. Bella's a Prostitute?

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Because this was going to be part of the last chapter (well, most of it was. Of course I had to change things for it to make sense) it is also in Edward's point of view. I was just too lazy to change it to Bella's. The chapter picks up exactly where the last left off, so you might want to go back and skim the last few lines or something.  
**

**I gotta start writing faster (though my homework and school are not wanting me to do that at all, apparently) because this review-withdrawal is really getting to me!**

**So, I had issues with the song. This is the only song that would fit, but there were some words in here **_**I**_** wouldn't even condone, let alone say/write. So those certain words I completely blanked out with stars.**

**~Emmy**

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Chapter 30: Bella's a Prostitute?

Song: I'm N Luv (Wit A Stripper) by T-Pain (feat. Mike Jones)

[Intro]

Goddamn Lil Mama

U know u thick as hell u know what I'm sayin

Matter fact

After the club u know what I'm talkin bout

Me and my ****** gone be together u know what I'm sayin

I ain't gon worry bout them really though

I'm just lookin at u

Yea u know

U got them big ass hips god damn!

[Verse 1]

Got the body of a goddess

Got eyes butter pecan brown I see you girl

Droppin Low

She Comin Down from the ceiling

To tha floo

Yea She Know what she doin

Yea yea yea

She doin that right thang

Yea yea yea yea ea

I Need to get her over to my crib and do that night thang

Cause I'm N Luv wit a stripper

[Chorus x2]

She poppin she rollin she rollin

She climbin that pole and

I'm N Luv with a stripper

She trippin she playin she playin

I'm not goin nowhere girl I'm stayin

I'm N Luv with a stripper

[Verse 2 (T-Pain)]

Out of all the girls she be the hottest

Like n the way she break it down I see u girl

Spinnin wide

And She lookin at me

Right in my eyes

Yea She got my attention

Yea yea yea

Did I forget to mention

I Need to get her over to my crib and do that night thang

Cause I'm N Luv Wit a Stripper

[Verse 3 (Mike Jones)]

She's every man's dream

She's God's gift to Earth

Women they love 'em too

That's what you call a women's worth

See I love all the strippers

Because they show me love

They know I never pay as free whenever I hit the club

But I can't even lie

The girls are here so fly

She slidin' up and down that pole got me mesmerized

Mike Jones don't ever trick

But god damn she thick

I can't lie, I must admit

I'm in love with a stripper

[Chorus x2]

[Verse 4]

She can pop it she can lock it

Teddy Penderass down I'm bout to see this sexy girl

In My bed

She don't know what she is doin

To my head

Yea She turnin tricks on me

Yea Yea Yea

She dont even know me

Yea yea yea ea

I'd have got her over to my crib to do that night thing

Cause I'm N Luv Wit a Stripper

[Chorus x4]

Edward POV

"So now what?" Emmett said. He really wanted to hunt something now.

"Well, we didn't get a chance to eat. Maybe while you guys pack we can hunt." Esme suggested.

"Oh, we're already packed. We were going to move soon anyways so everything's ready. We even rented a truck to move everything in, packed it up, and sent it off!" Alice said.

"Would you like to eat too, then?" Emmett said.

"Actually, we had just done that too. We'll be good for the next few days."

"Then…" Emmett tried to think of something they could do while we hunted.

"It's okay! We'll sit in the cars and call the truck and tell it to go to your house instead!" Alice said.

"Where is it going now?" I asked. Did they already buy a house before they knew we were coming?

"No." Bella said, answering my unspoken question. "We sent it off to go to a storage unit we use when we're in-between houses. We have several storage units around the northern US. The truck was going to our storage unit in the Northwest."

"Well that's handy…" Emmett said.

"Yes, well, we do have a psychic guiding our every move." Riley said. Was it just me or did he sound bitter about have a psychic in the coven? No one else seemed to catch that, but I knew it was there.

"Uhh, how are you guys getting to our new house in Oregon? You going to run the whole way?" Emmett asked.

"Don't be a retard. We have four cars. We have plenty of room." Rosalie said.

"I call the BMW with Rosalie!" Alice cried, running in the direction of the cars like if she got there first, it would make it official.

"So, I guess we'll just call the truck and pick what cars we're going in." Bella shrugged and followed Alice, toting Riley behind her. Jasper shrugged at me and followed as well.

As they got farther away, I had to concentrate more to read their thoughts. Not that I was trying to invade the privacy of their minds, but this really was just a curve ball in my life, I didn't want to let it go, even for a second. I had to know she was still there.

_Crap_. I thought. _She probably heard that…_

Nothing. She didn't say anything. Of course, I couldn't read her mind, so I couldn't tell if she had actually heard it or not, but I didn't hear any difference. No thoughts from Alice, Jasper, or Riley about a change in her facial expression, no emotional change noticed by Jasper. I don't think she heard that! How far away were then when I thought it? A mile? A mile and a half? Could she not read minds automatically at such a distance? How far was her limit? Well, apparently under a mile! This would help me keep the secret!

Another thought occurred to me. Something that I probably shouldn't do. But I knew I would anyway. I headed towards the cars, slowly, still not exactly sure what I was doing.

_I shouldn't spy on them. That would be an invasion of privacy! Even more than the mind reading because it I'd be doing it on purpose!_

But we'd just be hunting in the _area_ and happen to over hear – with the power of mind reading that we can't exactly turn off – what's going on in the general direction of the cars! That's all we're doing! Nothing on _purpose_!

_That's _exactly_ what we'd be doing!_

You don't have to tell them that.

_But the point is that it's immoral!_

Looks like your feet don't care that it's immoral.

_Whaaa…?_

Indeed. I looked down and I was jogging towards the cars now. I could plainly hear all of their thoughts (except, of course, for Bella).

"_I know you're interested in that jeep, Jasper. You don't have to ride in the same car as me. Rosalie, Bella, and I will be having a girl talk! We all know how girl talks can get emotional…" _I heard Alice say through everyone's thoughts. Jasper smiled.

"_Where do I go then? I'm not riding in the BMW for 'girl talk'." _Riley said. I saw him roll his eyes, but through everyone else's thoughts I knew they didn't notice it.

"_Well, it looks like there's no more room in the jeep. That leaves the Mercedes with Carlisle and Esme or the Volvo with Edward."_ Alice said.

"_Jasper?" _Riley asked.

"_Edward is a quiet person. Esme and Carlisle will try to converse with you."_ Jasper said. He must have been used to such questions.

"_Volvo with Edward it is…" _ Riley thought, though through his thoughts he didn't sound that happy about it.

"_Hey, Jasper…?"_ Alice said. Through her thoughts, I knew she was asking him if he could take him and Riley away so she could talk to Bella privately. He must've known this too because he nodded and left, motioning Riley to follow. They ran until I couldn't hear their thoughts anymore.

"_Bella, something was bothering you back there. Don't you dare tell me otherwise, because I know what I saw." _Alice said.

I saw through Alice's eyes, Bella hung her head.

"_Yes, something was bothering me."_ She whispered.

"_Could you elaborate?" _Alice asked.

"_Well, it was kind of a sense of déjà vu." _

"_Really? When? Usually I'm the expert of déjà vu."_ Alice said, surprised.

"_Just…all the Cullen's. They all seem familiar." _Alice pondered what Bella just said.

"_Anyone in particular?" _She asked quietly, like she knew something. Her thoughts weren't betraying her though; she was concentrating fully on Bella's expressions and reactions.

Bella hesitated, which wasn't missed at all by Alice. _Yes._

_"Care to elaborate once again?" _Alice asked.

"_Well, I heard some…strange thoughts coming from all of them, but mostly…Edward."_ She whispered.

Alice's thoughts exploded. The wheels were turning in her mind, now that she knew she wasn't the only one that had noticed. She was making other connections, and was _very_ close to realizing the truth.

_They knew her. They all knew her. But she forgot. Bella doesn't know anything about her past. But they knew her. Which means that they knew her when she was human. Were they passing vampires? Were they the other vampires that we smelled Forks, where we found and saved her? Were they the ones that chased us? But they are vegetarians. So they weren't chasing us to eat Bella, they were chasing her to save her. Or to kill the people that had killed her. Which they thought was us. They wanted _us_ dead. What is they're connection to Bella, though? Were they planning on changing her? But when? And why? _

_"It just seems like they knew more about me then I did. Like they've met me before, I just don't remember." _ Bella went on to tell Alice.

_Should I tell her? Should she know? If they wanted her to know they would have told her. They _will_ tell her. She'll find out eventually. She should find out from them, the right way._ Alice thought._ "Huh, that's an interesting thought! Maybe you can ask them about it when they get back from hunting!" _Alice said.

Bella nodded like she was agreeing, though looked uncomfortable with the thought. Yes, Bella was a very shy person. Confronting anyone about nearly anything was hard for her to do. That hadn't changed over the years. She wouldn't confront any of us unless pushed to do so by someone else, namely Alice. I didn't have to worry about making up a story to satisfy Bella – or Alice, for that matter – for a while. Lying to a mind reader was nearly impossible, not to mention a psychic, and I knew I'd have to make it a good one.

I heard Emmett coming from a mile away, full of animal blood. Crap, I hadn't had anything to eat yet! I ran after the first thing that moved. That happened to be a squirrel. Yumm… But it's the only thing that was around and I couldn't let anyone know I was spying on Bella and Alice.

"Yo! Edward! You ready to go?" Emmett called.

"Yeah!" I yelled back and ran to where everyone was gathering, at the cars.

Jasper and Riley appeared just after I did.

"Did you call the truck?" Alice asked Jasper. He nodded.

Alice jumped in Rosalie's car, dragging Bella along with her. "Let's get this convoy _started_!" Alice squealed. Emmett laughed, slapped Jasper on the back, and got into his jeep.

_Hopefully Edward tells Bella soon. I don't like that Riley character…_ Emmett thought. Bella looked up at him sharply.

"Emmett, shut up!" I hissed at him.

"I didn't say anything!" He said, his jeep door still open.

"But you thought it." I knew everyone could hear us, but I needed Emmett's mind to go elsewhere, away from the place that will tell Bella our past together.

"No." She said. All heads snapped in Bella's direction. She got out of Rosalie's car and walked over to us. "No , I want to know what Emmett was talking about. You have all been thinking very strange things and I want them explained."

I could see that Alice's visions were speeding by her so fast that she could barely catch a glimpse of one as I tried to think of an excuse Bella would believe. So far all of Alice's visions ended in them leaving, not planning on coming back. That's not going to happen.

"Well...you see…" I stalled. Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett could see that I couldn't think of anything good.

"Fine! I'll tell you!" Emmett called in a melodramatic voice. He stood up out of his jeep. He was blocking his thoughts so Bella (and consequentially me) couldn't hear what he was going to say. "You don't remember your human life, do you?" He asked.

She shook her head, confused as to why he was singing the Barney and Friends theme song in his head.

"Well, I do!" He went way over the top. Alice, Jasper, Riley, and Bella were too shocked by his words to notice, though.

"You…knew me when I was human?" She asked.

"Emmett…" I growled. Was he seriously going to tell her?

"No, Edward, she should know the truth!" Emmett kept up his over dramatic charade.

"Emmett, don't you dare!" I hissed.

"No, Edward, she must know the truth of her past!" I was about to tackle him when he winked at me. No one else noticed. Does that mean he's not really going to tell her?

"No, you better tell me the truth." Bella directed that at me, then Emmett.

"I am! Bella, we _all_ knew you when you were human. Not directly, of course, just what Edward had told us." Emmett said.

What the hell was he doing?

"You see, Edward knew you when you were both human. You were both young. Well, exactly the same age as you are now, I suppose…anyway. Edward told us the story of his last few days as a human…and how _joyous_ they were."

I really was quite confused.

"It all started late one night, a little over 10 years ago. Edward was alone and lonely. He needed…_company_." Emmett turned that into some sort of an innuendo. "So he went out to the alleyways and dark streets in a bad neighborhood of crack houses, gang hangouts, and…_prostitutes._" Bella's eyes got wide. As did mine. "That's when he came across you." Emmett said happily.

"Yes, the nice, innocent girl on the wrong side of the tracks, right?" I gritted my teeth.

"No, Edward, Bella must know the truth. Don't candy-coat it for her." I shook my head. I had a feeling I knew where this was going. "No, Bella, you were the prostitute that Edward set his sights on." Everyone, even us Cullen's, gasped at Emmett's statement. "Yes, I know, shocking. Edward just seems like too much of a goody-two-shoes to go looking for a prostitute, right?" I shook my head, dumbfounded. How could he do this to me? "So, from what Edward told us later, he _hired_ you. You had a _fun_ evening. And night. And the next morning. And the next afternoon. And the next evening. And the next – "

"Okay!" I yelled. "I think we get it."

"You must have been very…lonely…Edward." Rosalie snickered. I rolled my eyes.

"Yes, continuing. Edward, as the song by T-Pain suggests, fell in love with the stripper."

I dropped my jaw. He had to be _kidding _me!

"I…I…was a prostitute?" Bella stuttered. Alice was completely shocked, though through her thoughts I could tell she was seriously doubting what Emmett just said. Jasper was reading the emotions of everyone and a little confused why everyone else was so shocked while Emmett and Rosalie were extremely amused. Bella was too stunned to do anything.

"Now that we got _that_ out of the way, let's go!" Emmett got in and closed his jeep door, while Jasper shook his head and climbed into Emmett's jeep. Rosalie hopped into her BMW and Riley slowly walked to my Volvo.

"Come on Bella. We can talk about it more on the ride to Oregon." Alice whispered, pulling Bella to Rosalie's car. She was so shocked, she walked with Alice without even thinking. I gave Emmett a death glare, but walked to my Volvo.

How was I going to fix this? Bella seriously thought she had been a prostitute! Sweet, innocent, Bella. How could she possibly believe that she had done that? I climbed into my Volvo, cursing Emmett under my breath.

_I always knew she was a slut._ Riley thought.

* * *

**Yeah, my goal of making it end not abruptly didn't exactly work. But whatever. Hopefully you guys don't mind.**

**~Emmy**

**twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter…**


	33. The True Side of Riley

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: I had to completely rewrite this. It was WAY too harsh and Edward knew too much by then end. Thank you, Aliames (AKA, Ruby. You'd know what that nick-name meant if you followed me on Twitter....) for being my beta for this chapter! You totally took it from being a complete mess to being a hot mess! (I don't know what that means but I think it's a good thing.)**

**~Emmy  
**

**

* * *

**Chapter 31: The True Side of Riley

Song: Down With the Sickness by Disturbed

(Can you feel that?)

(Oh shit)

Ooh ah ah ah ah!

Ooh ah ah ah ah!

Drowning deep in my sea of loathing

Broken your servant I kneel

(Will you give in to me?)

It seems what's left of my human side

Is slowly changing ... in me

(Will you give in to me?)

Looking at my own reflection

When suddenly it changes

Violently it changes

Oh no, There is no turning back now

You've woken up the demon ... in me

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Open up your hate, and let it flow into me

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

You mother get up

Come on get down with the sickness

You fucker get up

Come on get down with the sickness

Madness is the gift, that has been given to me

I can see inside you, the sickness is rising

Don't try to deny what you feel

(Will you give in to me?)

It seems that all that was good has died

And is decaying in me

(Will you give in to me?)

It seems you're having some trouble

In dealing with these changes

Living with these changes

Oh no, the world is a scary place

Now that you've woken up the demon ... in me

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Open up your hate, and let it flow into me

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

You mother get up

Come on get down with the sickness

You fucker get up

Come on get down with the sickness

Madness is the gift that has been given to me

And when I dream

And when I dream

And when I dream

And when I dream!!!!

(Here he goes into this long rant that is a little disturbing and not related to the chapter so I cut it out)

Ooh ah ah ah ah!

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

Open up your hate, and let it flow into me

Get up, come on get down with the sickness

You mother get up

Come on get down with the sickness

You fucker get up

Come on get down with the sickness

Mad-ness has now come over me

Edward's POV **(We've been hearing a lot from Edward lately. I'm thinking next chapter we go back to Bella's POV, yes?)**

_I always knew she was a slut._ Riley thought.

I completely stopped moving. Everyone else started their cars and pulled out onto the street. Had Bella heard that? I turned my mind to Alice and Rosalie's thoughts. Bella was laughing at something Alice had just said. She hadn't heard that. I turned to Riley, shock written over my face.

_What the hell is he staring at me like that for? Drive, idiot!_ He thought, but said, "Are we going to go?"

A low growl ripped from my chest. He started back in his seat at the sound. _What the hell is his problem?_ I let the growl out louder, but started the car and pulled out onto the road.

"You remember my power, don't you?" I said through clenched teeth.

He hesitated. _Can he…read minds?_

"Yes, Riley. You're right." I growled.

_Aw shit._

I roared at him. "How the _hell_ could you think that? About your _mate_? About _Bella?_"

He turned to me. "Because it's the truth. Emmett even said! She was a _prostitute!_"

I roared again. "He said that because he's _Emmett!_ It's not the God-damn _truth!_"

"It might as well be, that little whore." He scoffed.

It took all the control I had not to crash the car and rip his throat out right there.

"Don't tell me you don't see it. She's a dirty whore and you know it. You must know it. If you've known her for more than ten seconds you know it!"

My control on not killing him wavered a little and the car swerved.

"How _dare_ you say that! How _dare_ you even _think_ that! Bella is innocent and sweet and she doesn't want anyone to do that to her! Least of all scum like you!" I roared.

"Yeah, right."

"I know you're not right, Riley. I know that you're not who you say you are. Tell me what you're really doing here." I gritted my teeth. He was leading her on. It was obvious _she_ loved _him._ But also very apparent that he didn't think of her as much.

"I can't." He said.

"What do you mean, you _can't_?" I ground my teeth.

"It's a secret." He was acting like a child!

"You can trust me." I said.

"Can I? It sounds like you're in love with her. You'll tell her for sure."

"That was our past. A past she doesn't even remember. It's over and done with, buried. I won't try to resurrect what once was." I said. I wasn't telling the whole truth, though.

_Well, this has been on my chest for the last ten years. Maybe I can finally tell someone. I can't trust him, but I can make him forget once I'm done._ He thought. He forgot easily that I could hear him. But what did he mean he could make me forget? He didn't have a power, did he? If he did, no one else knew about it.

"Ok. I'll tell you." He said, with a sly grin on his face. "Basically, ten years ago, Bella slipped up. She drank some human blood. Mine, to be exact. I didn't die, obviously, be she essentially killed me. I could never see my family again. My adoring mother, my caring father, my loving baby sister, my best friends that always had my back. I had the perfect life. And she took it all away. With one bite. I wish they had killed me. I wish she had finished me off. Because what I have to go through now is worse than any hell could be.

I changed. Vampire, they said I was. For a while, I was in hell. Alice trying to set me and Bella up, all the while, I hated her guts.

Then, one day, I decided I was sick of it all. I was sick of them following me around. I was never alone. _Never_. So I yelled at them. I told them not to follow me. I was going to go hunting and they weren't to follow me. And they listened. Well, they were forced to listen. They all turned to statues. I took the opportunity and got out of there. A mile or so later, a red-haired beauty stopped me. Victoria, she said her name was. And she loved me. She said so. She said that she needed me. I fell in love. At first sight. She was the answer to everything. She could make this hell into heaven! She told me what had happened to her. What Bella had done to her. She needed revenge. And I was definitely the one to help with that. We found out my power, and tested it. I could command anyone anything, and they had to do it. If I told you to run a mile, you would do it. You wouldn't be able to control it. If I told you to forget, you would. You wouldn't have any recollection of what just happened. It was perfect.

Victoria told me to go back to them. Go back to my hell. I had to. I had to pretend to fall in love with Bella. I had to. I didn't want to, believe me. But for Victoria I would do anything. She said she would be watching, and when the time was right we would lead Bella away and take vengeance upon her. She would pay for what she did to us.

But Victoria disappeared not too long after that. A mistake was made. That damn psychic got a reading on her. Bella, Jasper, and Alice thought of a way to get her off our trail. I tried to help Victoria keep on track, I tried, I really did. I touched as much as I could so she had a strong trail to follow. I didn't know what the bitches where planning though. We separated. Different trails. It was confusing. Too confusing. They came back and we all ran into a storm, our scents being lost to Victoria. I tried to help, I tried to help. I did anything I could to try to leave my scent. But the rain. The rain. The rain. The rain was too strong. It washed and washed and washed everything away. Everything was gone. Victoria was gone. She never found us. Never found us. I waited. Lord knows I waited. I'm still waiting. She told me not to kill Bella without her, and I won't. Not without her. This will be her victory, as much as mine. She will be here. She will come. She will come and free me from my hell once again. And we will leave, never to return. And we will be happy. So happy. Like a fairytale. I will be her prince. Her king. We will love each other. So much. More than I could ever love Bella. Much more. Bella is a peasant in comparison. A peasant compared to a queen. No comparison. There is no comparison. No comparison…"

I sat in silent shock all the way through his story. A few times what he said got me angry, but I controlled it. This bastard was _crazy_!

"You…don't…love her." I barely got out, I was so angry.

"That's an understatement. I don't even _like_ her." Riley rolled his eyes.

"But Victoria's not coming back. It's been ten years. She's not coming back." I said to calm myself.

"Oh, she's coming back. And when she does, Bella will die. We'll probably take out the little pixie and her emo boyfriend, too. But Bella first, definitely. I've been thinking, since Victoria left, of ways to kill her. And you'll watch her die now, I suppose."

My anger ripped out of me like a burst of flames. Everything he had said finally registered in my mind. Everything vile about Bella. Everything he said he had done to her, what he was planning on doing to her. It all clicked. And it exploded in me. I abruptly stopped the car, a stop Riley hadn't expected. He got slammed forward, before I got out of the car, ran around to his side, ripped his door open, grabbed him by the collar and ripped him out.

"What? Are you going to defend your precious whore?" He mocked me. I let out the loudest roar I possibly could. Birds from a tree a mile away were scared off and flew away. I didn't care who heard me. Riley was going to die now.

I picked him up and threw him on the ground, where he skidded to a stop a few yards away. He crouched down and growled.

"I knew you loved her. I knew you would defend her. Do you really think you'll win this? They'll come back. They heard you. And when they do, Bella will be on my side. You won't be able to kill me then Besides, I'll make you forget." He grinned an evil grin. I had to wipe that off his face. I lunged and caught him by the throat, pressing him up against a tree.

"You don't deserve Bella or her love. You worthless piece of shit." I growled and threw him against the tree so hard, it cracked. He laughed.

"I may be a worthless piece of shit, but this piece of shit is winning." He said. He leaned back against the tree with all his weight and brought up his legs and kicked me in the stomach with all his strength. I flew back and hit another tree. I heard this one crack as well. I stood up straight, as did he. In the middle of the road, we circled each other. We were both going for the kill. I feinted left, but he didn't fall for it. He lunged right but I moved and took a swipe at him, missing. We circled again. That's when I heard everyone coming back.

"Forget the story I told you." Riley said.

Why is everything fuzzy? Why was I crouching in front of Riley? What happened? I was fighting him...I remember that. I just don't remember why.

Emmett pulled up his jeep, and jumped out, running up next to me.

"What the hell's going on?" He asked, looking between me and Riley. We had stopped moving, but were still crouched low, ready to spring at a moment's notice, though I had completely forgotten why. Emmett glared at Riley.

Rosalie's BMW pulled up. Bella hopped out before it was even stopped and ran to Riley's side.

"What's going on?" She asked, taking Riley's hand. He smiled his evil smile and me and turned to Bella.

"Nothing, babe. Everything's fine." He bent down and gave her a long kiss. That bastard was trying to piss me off. I might not have remembered exactly why I was fighting Bella, but I heard his vile thoughts as he kissed her. I roared and lunged at him. Bella gave a tiny scream and moved behind Riley, who smiled. Before I could land on him, Jasper pulled me to the ground. I landed on my back with an "oof".

"What's going on?" Jasper asked angrily. "What are you attacking Bella for?"

"He wasn't attacking Bella, he was attacking Riley!" Emmett said.

Bella gasped and looked at me, anger on her face.

"Edward…?" Carlisle walked up to the scene. I stood up straight and faced him. "This is the fourth time this question has been asked of you. What's going on?"

"Riley –" I started. I was going to tell them everything, well, at least what I knew. Which I guess was nothing, really.

"Sorry, sir. I said some things, and I must have made him angry. I apologize. I didn't know that's the reaction you would have at a "your mom" joke." Riley tried to hold back his laughter.

Emmett, for once, didn't laugh. He saw through Riley's lie just as much as I did. I wouldn't get so furious at such a thing. His thoughts didn't betray him at all, though.

"What is wrong with you? Why did you attack him like that? Can you not take a joke?" Bella hissed.

"I…" How did I respond to that?

"No. No. You don't have anything to say for yourself. You shouldn't. You weren't thinking." She turned to Alice. "I don't know if I want to stay with them, Alice. I don't think this is going to work out." Alice looked shocked.

"No no no no no! It's fine! Everything's fine! It was just a misunderstanding! Edward, Riley, wasn't it just a misunderstanding?" Alice looked desperate.

Riley looked at me innocently. I racked my brain for a reason I attacked him. I couldn't remember.

"Yes. Just a misunderstanding. I'm sorry. I'm just very sensitive about "your mom" jokes." I said through clenched teeth.

"Are we okay here, boys? Can we get past this and move on?" Carlisle asked. We nodded. "Do you think you can handle being in the same car?" I shook my head. I wasn't going anywhere near him. I knew I did it for a reason, I needed time to remember that reason. Carlisle sighed. "That's okay. Riley, you can ride with Esme and I." He said. Riley nodded courteously and followed him to his Mercedes, where Esme was sitting in the front seat. They got in and pulled away. Bella gave a long look to Riley and a last glare at me before she followed Alice back to Rosalie and her BMW and drove off. Jasper got back into Emmett's jeep.

_Edward?_ Emmett thought. I turned to him and nodded, telling him to go on. _That's not what happened. _I shook my head. _You will tell me what really happened, you know. If Riley deserves it, we'll give it to him. I don't like him much so far._ I nodded. _I_ needed to figure out what really happened first.

But there was one thing I did know, and that was that this was far from over between me and Riley.

* * *

**Much better than before, I think. Now I have to decide what will be in the next chapter. It will be Bella's POV, but should I do the time as before this scene so we see Bella's thoughts on being a prostitute and her reaction to this scene here ^**

**Or should it be after this, so we see Bella's reaction to this chapter but we also move along with the story. Opinion? I'm not going to put a poll up, but you're commentary is much appreciated!**

**~Emmy**


	34. Calm Down, Bella

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: I'm **_**really**_** sorry this is so late! I've been really…depressed…lately and it's been extremely difficult for me to write (not to mention my lack of time). I'm so grateful you guys are sticking with me and this story and I seriously love you all. Your reviews and comments are rays of sunshine breaking through the gray clouds over my head. Know that I appreciate and am thankful for all of you. I don't respond to all reviews (mostly the ones that are praise. I seriously don't know how to respond to praise…). Just know that every single review, be it praise, advice, or a flame (I think those are funny, if a little hurtful), each review/PM makes me grin and puts me in an extremely good mood all day. I know this is kinda sappy, and it's not the first time I've said all this, but I just wanted to make sure you all know how happy you all make me. : D**

**~Emmy**

**I really don't want to reread this and edit it so I'm not going to. Please excuse and grammatical or spelling errors.  
**

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**Chapter 32: Calm Down, Bella

Song: Earth to Bella by Incubus **(Best I could come up with)**

Earth to Bella  
You think you've got it all figured in  
Earth to Bella  
Everything you know is wrong (well almost)  
Earth to Bella  
I see where you are not listening  
I bear the burden of being the voice that let's you know  
We all grow old  
And before you swim you've gotta be okay to sink

Earth to Bella  
The world can be an unfriendly place  
So hold your head up  
And do your best to save some face  
It's not so hard  
Just undo yourself and see a second sun  
ascend

I'm okay to sink  
Ok to sink  
I'm okay to sink  
ok to sink  
I'm okay to sink

Bella POV

"Bella, calm down. They're guys! There was just too much testosterone in the car! Well, wait. Do vampires still produce hormones? Hmm, I don't know. Either way, boys will be boys!" Alice was turned around to face me from her front seat in Rosalie's BMW. I was still fuming over Edward attacking Riley and was still rolling the idea of leaving over in my mind. Alice knew this because she kept getting visions of me and Riley leaving together. She was trying desperately to get me to change my mind. "And, hey! Now we know not to tell "your mom" jokes around Edward!" Alice said.

I called Edward's mind-reading power back to me. I felt pretty bad doing it; I'd always been big on privacy. It wasn't my business unless the person made it my business. But I knew Rosalie knew something, yet she wouldn't say anything. Alice had asked her why Edward was so uptight about "your mom" jokes but she was clenched her jaw and gripped the steering wheel tighter in response. I didn't have to call back Jasper's empathy to know she was mad. And that anger had to be about the issue of Edward and Riley.

So I put my morals aside for the moment to peak into Rosalie's mind.

_That bastard. Setting Edward up like that! There is no possible way that's why Edward got so mad. He doesn't even remember his mother! He's never been bothered by anything like that! This is Riley. Riley must have said something else. But what? What would get Edward so mad? They only thing I can this of is-_

"Bella!" Alice waved her hand in my face to get my attention. "Were you even listening to me?" I shook my head. Alice rolled her eyes. "I said that we should think about something else. More specifically, what were you thinking when you found out about your human life? We never got a chance to get into it."

Alice's suggestion made Rosalie crack a smile. I had lost the mind reading and didn't want to call it back again. I hated sticking my nose into other people's business, especially more than once.

"Goodness gracious, Bella! Can you not even stand to listen to me for a second? What were you thinking about when you found out you were a prostitute?" Alice said.

"Oh, well, first I was shocked. Then a little confused. I definitely wouldn't do anything of the sort now; what could have happened to make me do it back then? Then disbelief. I _wouldn't_ have done that." I said. I said it with confidence, but inside, Emmett's story of my past shook me to the core. The shock and confusion were true, but I had absolutely no idea what happened in my human life. Me being a prostitute is just as likely as me being a CIA operative. It _did_ explain how all the Cullen's seemed to know me.

And I eventually came to the conclusion that it didn't matter. That was then, this is now. As far as I'm concerned, I'm a virgin and plan to stay that way until I see fit. Which, honestly, didn't seem anytime soon/

"So you _don't_ believe it?" Alice asked.

I shook my head. "Nope." It was only a half-truth.

"Oh good!" Alice bounced in her seat. Rosalie and I looked at her curiously. "Well, I don't believe it either. I just wanted to know if you did. But you don't! Which is good! Now we can _really_ find out the truth!" Alice turned to Rosalie and raised an eyebrow. When she didn't get a response out of Rosalie, she continued. "Would you like to take it from here, Rose?" Rosalie looked between me and Alice, conflicted.

"Alice, it doesn't really matter. It's the past and it's behind all of us." I offered. I saw Rosalie roll her eyes. "What was that for? Have some people _not_ put it behind them?" I asked. In the rearview mirror, I saw Rosalie's eyes grow wide. She didn't think I saw her previous gesture. "Have they?" I repeated.

"Well…let's just say that, at the moment, the past is very much in front of us, staring us down, demanding to be confronted." She averted her eyes from mine.

Alice looked at me, a wicked glint in her eye.

"Oh no. I know that look. Alice, what do you know that I don't and what are you going to do about it? Probably against my will…"

She turned to face the front. "Nothing." She said innocently.

"Alice." I gave her my warning-voice.

She turned back around, exasperated. "Nothing! I swear! You can even look into the future, I'm not doing anything!"

"If anyone knows how to get around your visions, it's you. You may not have anything in concrete yet, but the wheels in that little head of yours are turning faster than a hungry hummingbird." I stated.

"Well, before those wheels start turning, I have to have more information first," Alice said, then turned to Rosalie. "Could you elaborate anymore on Bella's past with you and your family?" Alice asked.

Rosalie looked unsure. "How about you ask questions and if I can't answer them then I won't, and if I feel I can then I will." She compromised.

"Deal!" Alice exclaimed excitedly. "Ok…ummm…do Bella and Edward have a history together?"

"Well, yeah. Bella has a history with all of us. We knew her before she was human." Rosalie answered, purposefully not answering Alice's intended question.

"Ok, Rosalie. We all know Edward and Bella had _something_ together. Emmett claims it was a paid, sexual relationship, but it could have been as innocent as a couple of high school sweethearts. On a scale between high school sweethearts and a prostitute ring, where on that scale would you say they fell on?" Alice clarified.

Rosalie thought for a minute, stalling. "Well, definitely closer to the high school sweethearts side."

I gasped. I knew an answer like that was going to be said, but I still felt utter shock when I knew for a fact that Edward and I had a romantic history. I had been attracted to him. To _him_.

Not to say he's not attractive physically – he definitely is – but his personality really made him a downer. When we were back in the forest and I had empathy automatically because of Jasper, I felt huge waves of depression from Edward. But those just weren't emotions for the time and place, most were buried beneath the surface, on every layer from the very surface to as far deep as I could get an easy reading on. He was simply depressed, and he'd been that way for a while, it seems. Could I have really been with him when we were human? **(A/N: Of course Bella doesn't think about the idea that when he lost her years ago he became depressed…silly Bella…)**

"Okay! More questions!" Alice broke me from my thoughts. "How serious were they?"

Rosalie hesitated again. "I don't know if Edward wants you guys to know everything. Maybe wait for him to tell you." Rosalie suggested.

"He's not planning on doing that, Rosalie. In fact, he's going to be avoiding us for awhile." Alice said after a second.

Rosalie shrugged. "Then he doesn't want you to know and it's not my place to tell."

Alice huffed and folded her arms across her chest. She looked at Rosalie with askance then glared out the window like she was going to murder the next bug the flew by the car.

Rosalie laughed at her expression. "It's okay, Alice, I'm sure you guys will find everything else out eventually." Rosalie said.

Alice huffed and puffed again in response.

The rest of the drive to Oregon was filled with laughs, giggles, and girly conversations. A guy's worst nightmare.

"Good thing you made Jasper ride with Emmett." I said, close to our final destination.

Alice smiled and nodded in agreement. "Jasper doesn't make friends easily but I know they hit it off well." She said.

"That makes just two of us." I rolled my eyes, thinking about Edward and Riley's fight.

"Come on, we discussed this! Boys will be boys!" Alice said.

"Doesn't mean I have to like it." I said.

"True, very true." Alice said.

Rosalie came to a stop in front of a giant white house.

"Welcome home." Rosalie said.

"Finally." Alice beamed.

Home. Wouldn't that be nice.

* * *

**A/N: Ok, I'm finding that I have zero time to write. Zero! So my goal is to put out one chapter a week. That's pretty regular, so I think it'll be good. But I must warn you, my chapters aren't going to be getting much longer. I simply can't right a chapter that's more than 8 pages written out. I think this was 6 pages in my notebook and 3 pages typed. Yeah, apparently my handwriting is huge…**

**I blame the lack of plot in this chapter on writer's block (I've noticed that whenever I try to type a "-ock" (such as block) I always type "ack" (like black) instead. I have no idea why, "o" and "a" are nowhere near each other on the keyboard…). I know the general direction where the story has to go, I just don't know how to get it there smoothly…*sigh*. I guess I'll figure it out…**

**~Emmy**

**Twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter… Emmy56! Twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter twitter… Emmy56!**


	35. Memories

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song**

**I'm back! I am soooo sorry for going AWOL on you guys. But I have excuses! Excuses, excuses, excuses galore!!! **

**Alright, so I was planning to get this out last Saturday (my main writing day because I'm not usually doing anything else). But that couldn't happen because I was taking this **_**major**_** test (I shall not tell what test it is because it could disclose my age. Though, if you followed me on Twitter, you would know…) and so I didn't have time Saturday morning/afternoon. Not only that, but Saturday night I went over to my friends house. She had just gotten back from her dad's house. He has bronchitis. Little did she know, but she was sick. The symptoms weren't showing yet so we didn't know. Sunday morning she woke up sick. Fun. I told her if she made me sick I would strangle her. Well, Monday night, my throat starts to hurt. I'm thinking "Oh, it's okay. I can't **_**possibly**_** be getting sick. I **_**never**_** get sick." Well, Tuesday morning I'm at school. I can barely walk down the stairs. I called my mom to pick me up and I haven't been to school since. Hurray for the flu… (sarcasm if you didn't catch that). **

**I can barely watch T.V., it gives me such a bad migraine, so, knowing that, I hope you all realize that staring at a bright screen staring at little squiggles would have totally caused my brain to explode. **

**Not only that, but my cough is **_**so**_** bad that my mom's afraid it might be turning into bronchitis. **

**So, can you all forgive me? Hopefully. I'm still sick but I felt so bad for this being so late so I told myself to buck up and finish the damn chapter. I don't know how soon I can get the next chapter up, it kinda depends on whether my immune system decides to do its job or not. I shouldn't be sick for too much longer, though, so there's hope. Anyway, go and read the long awaited chapter! I can't say it's that good, as you can tell I haven't been in the writing mood.**

**~Emmy

* * *

**Chapter 33: Memories

Song: Crawling by Linkin Park **(yeah, a song was hard for this chapter. Sorry. You can never go wrong with Linkin Park, though!)**

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

There's something inside me  
That pulls beneath the surface  
Consuming, confusing  
This lack of self control I fear  
Is never ending, controlling

I can't seem to find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
(Without a sense of confidence)  
(I'm convinced that there's)  
(Just too much pressure to take)  
I've felt this way before so insecure

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

Discomfort, endlessly has pulled  
Itself upon me distracting, reacting  
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection  
It's haunting how I can't seem

To find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
(Without a sense of confidence)  
(I'm convinced that there's)  
(Just too much pressure to take)  
I've felt this way before so insecure

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing, confusing what is real

There's something inside me  
That pulls beneath the surface  
Consuming  
(Confusing what is real)  
This lack of self control I fear  
Is never ending, controlling  
(Confusing what is real)

Edward's POV

I know I'm missing something. But what? I have a huge chunk of my memory gone! One minute Riley and I were just starting to talk, the next I'm crouched, ready to rip his throat out.

He did something. I know it. Did he have an ability? To erase people's memories?

No, not erase. They were still there, but they were blocked. It's like there's a brick wall in front of me whenever I try to remember. I know the truth to what really happened is behind the wall, but I'm not strong enough to knock it down. Whenever I really concentrate, it's like the wall shakes, making me hopeful, but it ends us standing strong. How can I fight a brick wall? If I can't go through, what do I do? Around? Over? How do you go around or over such a thing?

We were all driving pretty close together, within sight of everyone, even with human eyes, so I could hear everyone's thoughts. I roamed through all the voices, looking for the one I wanted to hear.

I only stopped briefly when I heard Alice and Rosalie's thoughts. They were both listening as Bella explained she didn't believe she had been a prostitute.

_Well duh. Bella is so obviously a virgin it's not even a question. Not even Edward could change that while he had the chance._ Rosalie thought. I rolled my eyes. I didn't know how Rosalie could do it, but she could tell whether someone was a virgin or not with just a glance. She said it was in the way they walked, dressed, talked, everything. She said it was also obvious who hadn't gotten any in a while. I told her to keep stuff like that to herself.

Alice agreed with Bella; she hadn't been a prostitute. She soon voiced this, too. At least they knew the truth, or a least they knew what was a lie.

But they weren't exactly that relevant at the moment. I needed to find someone else. I went back to listening to everyone else's thoughts. Emmett was thinking about what Riley could have done, all the while his anger was mounting little by little at Riley. He knew he had done something too. Though he was angry and frustrated on the inside, he acted cool and collected on the outside while he was talking to Jasper. It was a wasted effort on Emmett's part. Jasper could read his emotions just as well as if he were showing them bluntly and on purpose. Jasper's thoughts showed he was thoroughly confused as to what could have made Emmett so mad, but like Emmett, he had a calm façade on the outside.

Their conversation caught my interest, though, and before I could pull away, I was listening to their conversation.

"No, man. That's just lame." Emmett shook his head.

"Oh yeah? And what would be better than that?" Jasper asked.

"What's better than 100 monkey's? Uh, how about 1 giant monkey!" Emmett feigned frustration.

"Dude. One giant monkey? No way. DO you know all the stuff you could do with 100 monkey's?" Jasper asked.

"Yeah, you'd sure spend a lot of time cleaning up the poop they throw at your face! All 100 of them!"

"I would train my monkey's to not throw poop." Jasper said confidently. Emmett just rolled his eyes. "Besides, if you had a giant monkey, that monkey would have giant feces."

"Monkey Man would be potty trained."

"Monkey Man?" Jasper raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, Monkey Man. That's his name."

"How creative." Jasper said sarcastically.

"Hey, do I hear any names for you 100 monkey's coming out of your mouth?"

"They wouldn't have names. I would just yell, "100 MONKEY'S, _UNITE!_" and they'd come running."

"Oh, yeah, and how disorderly would that be?" Emmett scoffed.

"I would train them to line up in rows like true soldiers." Jasper said with his head held high.

"Soldiers?" Emmett asked.

"The best. Like true confederates." Jasper saluted.

"I'm not even going to say anything about that…" Emmett knew when to stay away from a subject. So did I. I pulled my thoughts away from Jasper and Emmett. Besides, did I want anyone to know my fetish with spider monkeys?

I let my mind wander to the minds of others again. Only one car left. Esme was thinking about how she was going to remodel our new house. Carlisle was thinking about how he had to go to work tomorrow at his new hospital in Oregon. Then I finally heard him. Riley. I didn't really want to enter in the mind of someone like that, but I needed answers to what really happened and how and why he made me forget.

_She's coming. She has to be coming soon. She has to have found us. It's been 10 years. How can she be lost for 10 years? I need her. I need her to find us._

Ok. That raised many more questions than it answered.

_But what if she never comes? What if she's dead? Or found someone else? Or is trapped somewhere? Do I go through with it without her? She told me not to. But it's been 10 years. She's been waiting many years for her revenge, as have I. But there are more problems now. So many more obstacles. I'll die for sure. But it has to be done._

I knew he was a vile leech. I might not know exactly what he's talking about, but I'm fairly certain Emmett, Rosalie, Carlisle, Esme, and I are the new obstacles. And whatever he's planning on doing could cause his death. That can only be a bad thing (what he plans on doing, not his death). And, maybe most importantly, there's a "she" involved. A "she" that obviously isn't Bella. Riley revealed the "she" he was thinking about went missing 10 years ago. And by his thoughts, the way he thought about her, whoever she was, he loved her. Which means he didn't love Bella. Even though she loves him and thinks he returns these emotions.

Bella's going to get her heartbroken by a dirty scumbag who is just a ticking timebomb by the sound of it.

I had to tell Bella. She has to know.

There were only two problems with that, thought. First, I had no proof. More than that, she didn't trust me. Before, when we were human and together, if I told her she couldn't trust someone, she would trust me blindly and stay away from them.

Well, that is except for that one dangerous stray dog she fell in love with. She named him Jacob but he got violent. She wouldn't listen to me when I told her she had to get rid of him. Eventually he ran away, though.

But she didn't trust me at all now. In fact, she hated me! Of course, eventually I'd have to change that. First I had to get rid of Riley. Not only because he had the heart of my true love, but he had a gun pointed directly at said heart. He was a danger in more ways than one. He had to go.

Sooner than I thought, we arrived at our new house. Alice showed each of us our rooms, just like she planned out previously. Too late I realized my room was right next to Riley and Bella's room. I don't know if I can handle being so close to Riley.

_Edward. Go to the library. It's right off of Carlisle's new study._ Emmett thought. I rolled my eyes but started walking to the library anyway. How did he think we were going to talk? Riley (or anyone, for that matter) could certainly hear us if they tried.

Emmett was already in the library. I nodded at him.

_Start talking, buddy. I want to know what the bastard did._ Emmett thought.

"I don't know." I said.

_What do you mean you don't know? Do you not remember?_

I nodded. He looked confused for a second, then he got angrier.

_Did he make you forget? Likewith a power?_

I nodded. He growled inside his mind, but he knew not to voice it.

_That means it must be important so we _really_ have to know now._

I nodded in agreement.

_Try to think about it. What do you remember?_

"I've tried, Emmett. I remember nothing." I said. I could hear Riley and Bella upstairs in their room. _Lovely_. I rolled my eyes. They were kissing. Nothing I wanted to see. But something in Riley's mind caught my attention. It wasn't Bella in Riley's mind. It was a red head. Could this be the woman that went missing 10 years ago? A name was attached to her picture in Riley's mind. _Victoria_.

The wall shook. Suddenly the brick wall in front of my mind crumbled. Images and scenes from what really happened with Riley flooded my mind. Everything at once. I knew everything. Nothing was left hidden. Riley's voice explaining what had happened was ringing in my ears. I gasped. So much information all at once.

Bella had bitten Riley. Riley wanted revenge. Victoria, the red head, approached Riley with a plan for vengeance. They were going to kill her. Kill my sweet, loving Bella. But then Victoria was gone. They had seen her and gotten rid of her. And Riley was alone. Forbidden to go on with the plan without her, yet he needed to finish it. He was planning on killing her.

_Edward?_ Emmett asked. I turned my gaze to his. _Whoa. Dude. What's wrong?_ He must have seen the pure hatred in my eyes. I snarled, and turned to go upstairs. I was going to kill Riley, and I was going to kill him now. _Edward! Stop and tell me what happened! Do you remember? Tell me! _I ignored Emmett and kept going, though he followed me. Nothing was going to stop me from ripping that bastard's throat out. I'd explain everything later, once the job was done. Riley's death was the priority.

I ran upstairs, Emmett on my heels. I could hear his mind racing. He realized I must have remembered what happened and I was going to hurt Riley. He didn't need me to explain exactly what Riley did to be on my side. Emmett knew Riley was a scumbag and deserved everything coming to him.

I burst into Riley and Bella's room. Riley and Bella flew apart from each other, startled. I growled at Riley and got ready to crouch down. Victoria was in my mind, and I knew I was going to find and kill her the minute I knew Riley was dead.

Before I got a chance to spring at Riley, someone pounced on my back, aiming their razor sharp teeth at my throat. No one was going to get in between me and Riley, I didn't even care who it was. I grabbed their arm and flung them over my shoulder and into the corner of the room. I bent down to charge at Riley again when the person in the corner attacked me again. I roared at them and threw them across the room again. It was only then that I realized who was attacking me and who I was fighting. It was Bella.

* * *

**A/N: Oh snap! Now, don't everyone get mad at me! Edward did not beat Bella up just now! Ok! He's not Chris Brown!**

…

**Too soon? Hmm, sorry. Anyway. I should know to away from sensitive topics by now…**

**In case anyone was wondering how Edward got around Riley's power and remembered everything, I shall tell you: Because of his power, Edward has a stronger brain power than everyone else (besides maybe Bella. Because she can read minds and do lots more stuff). So Edward was strong enough to knock down that brick wall whereas no one else really is. Not only that, but Edward kept trying. He wasn't going to let a damn brick wall stand in his way, no sir-ee! (And no, I'm sure that's not how you spell that!) So, if you wanna call b.s. on that, I guess that's fine. Story of my life. Either way, hope you liked it, and I'm hoping the next chapter won't take so long to write.**

**~Emmy**


	36. She's Going, Going, and She's Outta Here

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Hmm, yeah, no excuse this time. I'm just lazy.**

**I seem to make up a few words in this chapter. Empaths? Leapt? **

**

* * *

**Chapter 34: She's Going, Going, and She's Outta Here!

Song: Crushcrushcrush by Paramore **(Maybe this song only makes sense to me in this chapter, but I think it fits pretty good.)**

I got a lot to say to you  
Yeah, I got a lot to say  
I noticed your eyes are always glued to me  
Keeping them here  
And it makes no sense at all

They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies  
They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies

Crush  
Crush  
Crush  
Crush, crush  
(Two, three, four!)

Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one, two I was just counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than this

If you want to play it like a game  
Well, come on, come on, let's play  
Cause I'd rather waste my life pretending  
Than have to forget you for one whole minute

They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies  
They taped over your mouth  
Scribbled out the truth with their lies  
You little spies

Crush  
Crush  
Crush  
Crush, crush  
(Two, three, four!)

Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one, two I was just counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than this

Rock and roll, baby  
Don't you know that we're all alone now?  
I need something to sing about  
Rock and roll, honey (Hey!)  
Don't you know, baby, we're all alone now?  
I need something to sing about  
Rock and roll, honey (Hey!)  
Don't you know, baby, we're all alone now?  
Give me something to sing about

Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one, two I was just counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than this  
No, oh

Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone  
Just the one, two I was just counting on  
That never happens  
I guess I'm dreaming again  
Let's be more than  
More than this

Edward POV

_Bella!_ I realize _she_ had been the one attacking me. The one _still_ attacking.

"Emmett!" I called. He knew what I wanted him to do.

_Edward, I don't know. She's not that comfortable around me on account of her not knowing me, I don't think it's a good idea._ Emmett thought, hesitant to hold back Bella like I wanted him too. Finally he grabbed her arm and I could focus.

I turned all my attention to Riley, who smiled wickedly at me. In his mind, he was thinking about Bella, pretending to be worried about her. Why was he pretending to care? I could tell by the look in his eyes that he knew I remembered everything. I pictured Victoria again in my mind, remembering how Riley had thought of her. That sick bastard loved her.

Bella roared loudly from behind me. A few seconds later, right when I was about to spring on Riley, Alice came running in. In her mind, she was remembering a vision she must have just had of Bella screaming at me, pure hatred in her eyes. A few moments later, Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie and Jasper were in the room.

_How did Alice get here before them?_ I thought. Alice must have guessed what I thought because she tapped the side of her head and thought, _head start_.

"Edward, please explain what's going on in here?" Carlisle said slowly. I realized that I was still crouched down, facing Riley. I slowly stood up.

"Nothing." I said and glared at Riley.

Bella roared again.

"Emmett!" Esme scolded Emmett, who immediately let go of Bella.

"No, let me explain! Riley is a _very_ bad person!" I said, turning to Bella. "He's planning on–"

Bella roared and jumped high in the air. The attack surprised me so much that I barely had time to react. Alice, though, must have saw it seconds before she sprang, because she stepped in front of me the second Bella sprang so Bella landed on her. Realizing her mistake, Bella jumped back to where she had been standing and got ready to jump again, eyes locked on my throat. No doubt she was planning on ripping it out. The real question was why? Sure, I attacked her mate and have every intention of killing him, but once Bella knows what kind of monster he really is, she'll probably _help_ me kill him!

"_Never_!" She hissed. What? "I would _never_ help you kill Riley!" She said. My eyes grew wide. That's right! We're within 30 yards of each other! She can read minds automatically! That means she must know what Riley's done and is planning on doing with that red-haired woman, Victoria! Another image of her flashed in my mind. Bella roared.

"My Riley has done _nothing_! _You_ are the one we should be killing!" Bella hissed.

"Bella! Don't say stuff like that!" Alice sounded shocked at Bella's behavior.

"No, Alice! You don't know who he is or what he's done!" Bella snapped. Ok, now I was confused. What _had_ I done?

Bella's head snapped to face me. She growled.

"Bella? What did he do?" Alice asked.

"Remember that flame-haired vampire that was going to kill me 10 years ago?" Bella asked. Alice, Jasper, and Riley nodded. "Edward knows her, and by the way he thinks about her, he loves he too. I don't know why she wants me dead, but any association with her and we know you're evil."

Bella's logic was flawed, at best. Bella was smarter than this! Or at least she used to be when she was human.

"Bella, you don't understand. I don't—"

"Oh, I _do_ understand. I don't know why you two want me dead, but I'm not going to stick around to find out." Bella hissed. She turned to Alice. "Riley and I are leaving. Right now. I don't expect you and Jasper to come with us; I know you have always wanted this family."

"But Bella, it's not a family unless you're here!" Alice said, but it was nearly concrete in her visions that Bella was leaving this second with Riley.

"Riley and I can't be a part of this "family", Alice, and I know you realize that. Edward wants me dead so we're leaving." Bella gave Alice, then Jasper, a hug, grabbed Riley's hand, and marched out of the room.

"Last time I at least got a hug…" Emmett mumbled. Rosalie looked like she was about to slap him in the back of the head, but stopped herself when she realized Emmett really was sad about Bella leaving.

I've never seen a persons face show so much devastation before than how much I saw on Alice's. Jasper tried to comfort her, but she ran away to her room, him on her heels. It was just me, Emmett, Rosalie, Esme, and Carlisle in the room.

"Explain. _Now._" Esme said.

"Ok, I saw into Riley's mind. Basically, I saw 10 years of pure hatred stored up there, all directed at Bella. Him and this red-haired Victoria planned on killing her the best chance they got until she was discovered following them 10 years ago, immediately they made her lose their trail." I said.

"Riley…wants to kill Bella?" Emmett asked, his rage mounting by the second.

"Not just kill, slaughter. He wants to see her suffer, he absolutely and purely hates her."

"How is that even possible? Jasper and her are empaths! Couldn't they easily see that?" Rosalie asked.

"I don't know exactly, but I do know that he shoves that part of himself so far deep down that Jasper and Bella wouldn't have a chance to see that part of him unless they dug _extremely_ deep. Not only that, but Riley can control and manipulate people and they're actions so powerfully it's like nothing I've ever seen or heard of."

"And because she saw you thinking about this Victoria, Bella thinks _you're _the one that wants her dead, not Riley." Rosalie said.

"How do we convince Bella of the truth?" Esme asked.

I ran my hands through my hair and sighed. "I don't know. I tried to tell her but you all saw how she wouldn't listen to reason." I said.

We were all silent for a minute, thinking about how we could fix this. Bella was in much more danger now that it was just her and Riley. We had to think of something and fast.

"What about Alice and Jasper?" Rosalie said. "Bella isn't closer to anybody else, except maybe Riley. If we can convince them of the truth and they try to tell her, maybe she'll listen more." Rosalie offered.

"No time to waste, let's go!" I said and ran to Alice and Jasper's room. From a few doors down, I could hear Alice screaming into a pillow. Normally I would turn around at this point and walk away to give her some privacy, but Bella was in danger.

Right as I was about to knock on their door, Jasper opened it with a scowl on his face.

"She doesn't want to talk to anyone at the moment, least of all you." He glared at me. He was protecting his wife from more emotional pain, and I respect that, but once again I reminded myself that Bella was in danger.

"We are all extremely upset at the recent events that have taken place and we understand that yourself and Alice do not want company at the moment, but we need to discuss with you a matter of grave importance." Carlisle said from behind me.

Jasper hesitated, but knew how serious Carlisle was being. After a moment, he opened up the door wider and stepped back to let all of us in.

Alice snapped her head up to glare at me, daggers in her eyes. She snarled and leapt off her bed to stand in front of me.

"Alice, I—" I started. She roared and started punching me in the chest and stomach. Even thought she had vampire strength, so did I, and she was much smaller than I was so her punches had as much effect on me as a 5 year old's would on a human man.

"How-could-you-do-that?" She said one punch per word. "Bella's-gone! My-best-friend! My-sister! All-your-fault!" Alice then stopped punching me and collapsed into my chest, dry-heaving. If she were human, tears would be streaming down her cheeks like an uncontainable river.

I looked up at Jasper questioningly.

_Hug her, she needs it. It will show her you care._ He thought with a nod.

I did as he said, and tentatively wrapped my arms around her tiny, heaving form.

"Alice, we have a way to get Bella back, but you need to be willing to listen to everything we have to say." Rosalie said cautiously. Alice nodded against my chest. I took my arms from around her and guided her to her bed to sit down.

It was time to tell them everything. I started from when I first met Bella when we were human, about my cancer and how I "died". We told her about the night we thought Bella had died and we followed the people who we thought had killed her. Jasper then interrupted to explain that was them and they're side of the story. I then proceeded to tell them my life without Bella and how it had been beyond miserable. I didn't go into _too_ much detail at that point because I didn't want them to all see the monster that I truly was. When I got to the part where we saw them all for the first time and everything leading up to this point, I couldn't have been more detailed. I even quoted all the important conversations. Alice and Jasper had to know as much as they could in the short time we had.

Except for they're explanation in the beginning, they were completely silent and contemplative through out everything. At the end, there were a few moments of complete silence as we anticipated what they were going to say. They were still absorbing everything we had said and thinking about what to do with all that information.

Finally, Alice broke the silence.

"It all makes sense, now that we know the whole story." Alice said, directing that at Jasper.

"Yes, I agree. There was something…off…about Riley and now I understand what that was."

"Jasper!" Alice cried, as though she just realized something.

"What? What's wrong?" He said, looking around for danger.

"This is _my_ fault!" Alice cried.

"_What_? How is this _your_ fault? No one knew Riley was so psychotic!" Jasper said.

"I set them up, Jasper! I made them get together! If I hadn't pushed them, it never would have happened and Riley wouldn't have Bella wrapped around his disgusting little finger!" Alice wailed.

"Alice, it's not your fault at all! Riley was the one leading Bella one! Leading _all_ of us on!"

No one knew what else to say. Jasper was right; this was only Riley (and Victoria)'s fault. No one could have saw this coming.

Alice suddenly gasped, a vision flashing behind her eyelids, consequentially flashing behind mine.

This vision was short, quick, and simple. Yet it was the worst flash of images I have ever seen in my entire existence. For the longest time I had thought it was true, but now, to actually s_ee_ it, was truly devastating.

It was Bella, dead. Not only that, but Riley stood over her, ripping her limb from limb, and burning the pieces.

I roared and shot out of the room, down the stairs, and out the door. That was _not_ something I was _ever_ going to let happen.


	37. The Beginning of the End

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**Oh, I bet you're wondering if you read that chapter title right. Yes! You did. I was thinking about it the other day, and we only have a few more chapters to go! :O **

**I know, I can't believe it either. Crazy!!! **

**And I know this is **_**suuuuper**_** late, and I apologize, but I'm just such a lazy procrastinator, I simply can't help myself. **

**Hope you enjoy this uber late chapter! I made it longer! Hopefully that cancels out that lateness, maybe?**

**~Emmy

* * *

**Chapter 35: The Beginning of the End

Song: Caught in the Rain by October Fall

It's a heartbreak, that you can't fix up  
It's a last try, when you've lost your luck  
And it's a bad day (it's a bad day)  
Another bad day  
It's a last chance, when they've given up  
It's a bad ride, falling out of love  
And can you take it?  
Cause I can't take it

It's starting up and never stopping again

When the rain starts shaking the ground  
I hope that you're ready now  
I hope you're ready for it  
When you get caught out in the rain  
I hope that you're ready now  
For all the storms to head your way

It's a long drive when you've got no gas  
And its a cheap date when your out of cash  
And its a bad day, another bad day  
And its a feeling when you've lost your touch  
And It's a plane ride, if you don't ride trucks  
And can you take it? Cause honestly I can't take it

It's starting up and never stopping again

When the rain starts shaking the ground  
I hope that you're ready now  
I hope you're ready for it  
When you get caught out in the rain  
I hope that you're ready now  
For all the storms that come  
When the rain starts shaking the ground  
I hope that you're ready now  
I hope you're ready for it  
When you get caught out in the rain  
I hope that you're ready now  
For all the storms to head your way

We'll find ourselves inside the raindrops  
And we'll fight the seconds inside every clock  
What's keeping you from leaving?  
The newspapers are reading  
Get out save yourself before we're burning in hell  
What's indide is what you're chasing  
But everyday is raining  
Pockets full of silver dimes  
I hope you're ready for this time...

When the rain starts shaking the ground  
I hope that you're ready now  
I hope you're ready for it  
When you get caught out in the rain  
I hope that you're ready now  
For all the storms to come  
When the rain starts shaking the ground  
I hope that you're ready now  
I hope you're ready for it  
When you get caught out in the rain  
I hope that you're ready now  
For all the storms to head your way...  
For all the storms to head your way...  
For all the storms to head your way...

Bella POV

I stormed out of the Cullen house, towing Riley behind me. I didn't need to bring any clothes with me, I'd buy more later. I just had to get out of that house, away from _him_.

I couldn't even believe Edward was working with Victoria! He _loved_ her! I know he did! He pictured her in his mind, the way he remembered her; distorted. Like he was seeing her through drunk glasses or something. He saw her with kind eyes, like she could never hurt a fly. In his mind, her hair was lighter, softer. Her face read that she was gentle and loving. Her mouth had had a generous smile on it, a smile that made you feel good.

All of this, of course, was a lie. Victoria had sharp eyes. They could see through you, wishing death would strike you down. Her hair was the color of flames, like she could kill you if you got too close. It was wild, showing her true personality. Her face was never kind. It was hard, like she wanted everyone in her way to die, and she wasn't afraid to kill them. And her mouth. Her mouth didn't look like it _could_ smile. It looked like it was in a permanent snarl, baring her teeth for the first chance she had to rip out your throat.

Edward's vision of her was skewed, as seen through the eyes of a lover. It just might be true what they say; love is blind. At least, blind to the bad – the evil – in the person.

I knew I couldn't' stay anywhere near someone that close to Victoria, that close to someone who wanted me dead. He might notify her where I was, and finish what she started, ten years ago!

But I knew there was something there; underneath my hate for Edward. I felt something else too. What was it? I couldn't put my finger on it exactly.

"Bella?" Riley asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yes?" I turned to him with a smile. He was the only thing that could make me smile at a time like this.

"Where are we going to go? I mean, of course we'll probably go back to our cabin and start renting it again, or go get another one, but I mean right now. What do you want to do?"

I sighed. What did I want to do?

"Let's hunt. I can take some of my anger off on some bears or something." I sighed.

Riley smiled. "I know just the place."

He grasped my hand more firmly as I ran slightly behind him. He held it like he was never going to let go. The thought made me smile.

We ran for at least a few hours; three minimum. I didn't really are how long it took to get wherever we were going, as long as Riley never let go of my hand.

Riley slowed down to a stop.

"Are we here?" I asked. He nodded. "Where is 'here' exactly?"

"Just a special place that we drove through once. Has a higher population of bears. But not just any bears. These are some of the most vicious bears in the northwest." Riley smiled. I tried to smile, but something in his voice made it hard for me to do. It was…creepy. I turned to go hunt.

"Bella?" He asked. That something was still in his voice. I turned back to him slowly. Something was wrong.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Before you hunt, I want to do something."

Red alarm bells were going off in my head. _Danger_. But what would be dangerous? Riley? Never. I shoved the urge to run away to the very back of my mind and stepped closer to Riley.

"What would that be?" I asked. He ran forward, knocked me to the ground, and hovered over me.

"What was that for?" I asked, confused.

"You're less powerful when you're on the ground. I'm in control now." He smiled. This was not his smile. This smile was spine-chilling.

"Riley? Please tell me what's going on." He shook his head, indicating he wouldn't. I didn't know exactly why, but I felt the need to call a few powers back to me. I called Jasper's empathy back to me first. The second I did, I felt a few emotions that I knew weren't my own; hopefulness and hatred. There was no love, no playfulness there at all. Now I _really_ had to know what was going on. I called back Edward's mind-reading to me. Why would Riley be feeling these things?

_…little bitch. Now's my chance. I got her far away. No one around for miles. No one to hear her scream. And if someone does, they'll blame it on a bear attack. No evidence pointing back to you, that's the rule.  
_

My eyes widened in shock. Riley was going to…kill me?

"Ah. I see you're starting to comprehend what's going on, little Bella. Isn't that cute. You didn't call back someone else's power, now did you? Do you really trust me that little? Well, I suppose you have reason to, but still. It's just too little too late." Riley winked at me.

I didn't really think about what was going on. I didn't think about how Riley had completely betrayed me, or that he was planning on killing me. All I could think about was that I was glad Edward wasn't here to see that he was indeed right.

I focused back on him, but I could see he was no longer focused on me.

_…it'd be more fun. Yes, we'll make it fun. We have plenty of time._

I could tell he was focused on his thoughts. I took my opportunity and shoved my two hands against his chest as hard as I could. The force sent him flying back. His back hit a tree. There was a huge crack and a branch came down from farther up on the tree. I didn't give him time to react, I took off running.

"STOP!" I heard him yell. _Not for you_. I thought, but my legs immediately started to slow. _What the hell?_ I tried to pick my feet off up the ground, but it was like they were cemented in. I didn't even move a centimeter. _I'm going to die! He's going to kill me! I'm so sorry Edward! For everything! Forgive me._

I could hear Riley saunter up behind me, laughing. "Did you think that would save you?" He whispered in my ear from behind me. I flinched away. Where was _my_ Riley?

He put his hand on my waist and walked around to face me. "Foolish Bella. Nothing can save you now." He bit my earlobe. I tried to pull away, but the cement seemed to have moved up from my feet to grab a hold of the rest of my body. I couldn't even blink.

"I had a thought back there, before you so rudely threw me at a tree." He said, leaning back to look me in the eyes. I could only stare back. "Since you're going to die anyway, I thought we should make it fun!" He said, radiating excitement. He looked as if he wanted to me to say something. "Oh, right. You can talk now." He said. The cement seemed to melt off of my face and head. "So what do you think? Let's have fun!"

"Fun for who?" I asked bitterly.

"Both of us, of course! I've always had your best interests in mind, Bella. We're mates, after all." He laughed wickedly.

"And how is killing me in my best interest?" I asked.

"Oh, well I guess not this. But that is off topic." He smiled. "Don't you want to hear my idea?" I just glared at him. "Well I'm going to tell you anyway. Drum roll please! We're going to make this a…hunt! Won't that be spectacular? I've never hunted a vampire before, and I know that most vampires would be much harder to hunt, but you never were too bright. This will be an easy win, yet still more enjoyable!" We stood there for a second, him eying me up and down, looking for a weak spot. "Let's start!" He said energetically. We both stood still. "Oh! Sorry I keep forgetting! I haven't used my powers in ten years, I forget I can use them now!" He said. "You can move."

I still just stood there. I could feel the cement was gone, but now I couldn't get my feet to move on they're own. It's like they were too terrified.

"What are you waiting for? Don't tell me you've given up! That's no fun at all!" He glared at me. "Run!" My body flinched on its own accord (or was it Riley's power?) but I didn't take a step. I still couldn't. "_Run!_" He roared, and lunged at me, which finally caused my body to react. I lunged to the side, turned and ran as far and as fast as I possibly could.

_I'll give you a few minutes head start, then you better start to worry. Let the games begin… _He thought.

Where do I go? I can't go back to the Cullen's. Not only did my pride stop me, but I knew they would help me. Well, maybe not the Cullen's, but Alice and Jasper definitely would. And I knew the look in Riley's eyes; he wanted blood to be spilled. Sure, he wanted mine, but I knew he would kill anyone, _especially_ if they got in his way and helped me. I couldn't put Alice and jasper at that risk. I didn't know how skilled a fighter Riley was, to begin with. If it was just Jasper vs. Riley, it doesn't matter how skilled Riley was, I've seen Jasper and heard about his past; Riley would be dead in a second. The only problem was that Alice was there too and I knew for a fact that she would try to fight too, no matter who tried to stop her. If Riley attacked Alice, Jasper would leap in between them, leaving himself vulnerable. That's when Riley would get Jasper. Yes, Alice was psychic and a good enough fighter, but I knew that if Jasper died, she simply wouldn't be able to hold it together, and she'd be the most vulnerable, in which case Riley would finish her.

I could not live in a world without Alice or Jasper. I loved them both too much.

After what I said to Edward – what I accused him of – I didn't think any of the Cullen's would help me. I was so out of line, _I_ wouldn't even help me! They didn't know me, and I had deeply insulted one of their family members.

So what do I do? I couldn't run forever, I didn't have anywhere to run _to_. And if I _did_ manage to get away from Riley, that might make Riley go back to the Cullen's and try to kill them! I'm sure all of them together could take him, but the risk was still there. Even a 1% risk of danger was unacceptable. This was my entire fault. I denied Edward's help when I had the chance, it wouldn't be fair of me if Riley attacked them. _My fault, all my fault…_

So what were my options?

I could let him win. Let him kill me. That did leave a risk that he would go after the Cullen's once I was dead, but I hoped that his blood lust would be satisfied and he wouldn't want to kill anyone else.

Or I could fight him. If I won, all the better. If I lost, I gave him that adventure, that thrill, that fun. That might have more of a chance of making him satisfied so he didn't go and try to kill anyone else. That seemed like the best option, more of a chance that the Cullen's wouldn't have to get involved.

I stopped running and turned around. What should I do? I had a few miles head start, and a few more minutes. I ran around and ran up and down every tree within a few yards. That way, Riley wouldn't exactly know which tree I was in when he finally got here. I climbed up a tree and stayed in this one. The leaves covered me enough that I knew he wouldn't be able to see me even if he was staring up at the tree.

I waited for him. When he got here, I would jump. Nothing better than the element of surprise.

As I waited, I started thinking about Edward. I felt so guilty about what I had said, I couldn't even express it in words. If I got out of this alive, I knew I would become a fricken _slave_ to him if that made it up to him.

The more I thought about him, the more I realized what I hadn't noticed before. Even though I had hated (I flinched at the word) him, I knew that I…didn't. (Hate him, that is). The strange feeling that I couldn't recognize before when I thought about him; it was there back then too. Even when I wanted him dead, there was an emotion there that I couldn't pinpoint. Why couldn't I? I was in a climate of emotions daily with the help of Jasper! I'd witnessed and felt every emotion imaginable! Why couldn't I name this one? Maybe I couldn't feel it all the way. Maybe I shoved it down and built the hate right on top so I couldn't see it. No wonder I didn't notice until just now that it was there. But I must have shoved it down subconsciously.

How could I do that? I learned ten years ago to never shove an emotion down. That was one of Jasper's first lessons. When you feel an emotion, no matter if it's yours or someone else's, identify it and know how to deal with it. If there's someone in your class (because we repeated high school so many times) and they are constantly afraid whenever you are around, you need to be able to identify that and so we can react accordingly. This method of dealing with emotions helped us to know when it was time to move away sometimes. Of course, there are the bad emotions like anger and blood lust that we don't want to be feeling, but we don't shove them down automatically. We acknowledge that we want a human's blood and we act on it in that we go hunting to quench that thirst (for animals, of course). Emotions aren't to be taken lightly and are not to be thrown away. So why would I ignore – subconsciously, at that – this emotion? This emotion I couldn't even recognize?

I thought about it harder. It did remind me of something…Alice and Jasper. How they felt when they were around each other. Usually when they felt this emotion, they started to get more personal with each other, and that was mine and Riley's queue to evacuate the residence. Both of us knew that that was Alice and Jasper "Alone Time". It wasn't lust they were giving off, when this emotion came up strongly, it didn't usually lead to that. Well, if it did, me and Riley were long gone by then. No, we left because they started to look at each other differently; like they were truly seeing each other. Like they were seeing inside each others souls. It was so deep and personal, I felt like an intruder every time I saw it.

I knew what Alice and Jasper were feeling when they had these delicate moments. It was love. Pure, unadulterated love. It took me this long to put a few puzzle pieces together. I had never felt what Alice and Jasper felt towards each other towards Riley. I never loved Riley. Along with this, I realized another thing. Just because I hadn't felt these emotions toward Riley, I _had_ felt them towards someone else. And I think I know who. Could it really have been –?

"Oh Belllllla…" Riley's sickening voice interrupted my thoughts. He was a few yards away, where my scent went up the first few trees. "You tried to trick me, didn't you?" He laughed. "Tried to play a little trick. Well darling, it didn't work _that_ well, did it? I know you're here somewhere. It's only a few yards radius, you aren't far. I'm afraid you're making this game _too_ easy. Let's hope you put up a little fight when I grab you." He said.

He walked slowly around all the trees that had my scent on them. "I know! How about we make a deal! This will be all too easy if I use my powers, now wouldn't it? I could just order you to drop dead and you'd do it! Well, that would take the fun out of everything! How about we make a little deal? You won't use _any_ of your powers and I won't use mine. Does that sound fair? That way we can really see who the better fighter is. I'd like to think it's me, but I'll never be satisfied if I knew that I beat a woman only because I had cheated. You wouldn't want the same thing over your head, now would you? No powers. And if you _do_ use your powers, that gives me a right to use mine. And, oh boy, would that be awful for you. I can make you do anything I want, and I know you don't want to do a lot of the things I'm thinking of."

He was silent for a moment. "I guess you won't yell out "Deal!" now would you? I suppose not. How about this; if it's a deal, be absolutely silent. If it's not a deal, scream down "No deal!". Your choice. Do we have a deal?" He asked.

I couldn't give away where I was. I stayed silent.

"A deal it is then! Oh, joy, this will be so much fun! That means get all the powers you called to you to go away. I promise I won't tell you to do anything." He said. I knew I couldn't exactly take his word, but I did know that if he _did_ use his power, that means I had the right to use mine. Plus, if I used my power, he would use his power on me. That feeling of shear helplessness washed over me again with the memory of the cement surrounding me whole body and casing me in. I didn't want to go through anything like that again. I would take the deal. I banished all the powers from my mind.

Finally he circled the tree I was in. I crouched a little, and sprang. I landed on his back, and I put my arms around his head. I prepared to rip it off, but he was faster than me. He reached his arms up and ripped me off his back, throwing me forward, over his head. My back hit a tree and I fell, upside down. I stood up quickly and crouched in front of him.

"This is fun. Are you having fun? I think this is fun!" He laughed and lunged at me.

He got a hold of my left arm and wrenched me forward. I was stuck in his grasp. He bent his head down and bit my shoulder, preparing to tear off my arm. I could feel the immense pain, but forbade myself to holler. I made a sharp turn and spun around, which loosened his hold on me. I grabbed my arm back and threw myself backwards. I landed against another tree. I crouched down again and this time I made the first lunge. I thrust myself forward and grabbed his hand, making not hesitation as I ripped his hand off. He howled in pain. I didn't even want to know what that felt like if just a bite made me want to scream.

He recovered surprisingly quickly. He was even angrier than before. He snarled and pounced on top of me, causing us to fall on the ground. I felt that I landed on an extremely sharp rock, which usually wouldn't do anything to my marble skin, but with the force behind Riley's push, I could feel it go into my lower left back and stay there. I tried not to scream but I whimpered a little.

I grabbed two fistfuls of hair and ripped them away from his head as hard as I could. He howled again, but not as loudly. He snapped his teeth at my throat like a rabid dog. My hands wrenching his hair away from his scalp caused him to not quite reach where he was aiming for. He did come close though. I could feel his teeth leave gashes on my throat and top of my chest.

He grabbed my sides and reached his hands under my shirt. _Shit, was he trying to cop a feel? _I thought with disgust. Not exactly, I realized as he dug his fingernails in my sides and pulled down, making deep gashes in my sides. I screamed in pain. The pain caused me to loosen my grip in his hair ever so slightly. That was all he needed. He now had enough room to fully bend down his head, which he did. I could feel his teeth on the side of my neck as they pierced my unbreakable skin. I shrieked in such pain. I knew I was dead. I couldn't do anything else. He had won. My last thought was that I sincerely hoped he was done and wouldn't go after the Cullen's, especially Edward.

Of course, it was then that I heard, or rather felt, another presence there. I couldn't hear; there was too much ringing in my ears. My eyes rolled back as I prepared to die. Suddenly Riley was ripped off of me, and I heard him be thrown into a tree, causing it to crack. I had my eyes open long enough to see my savor; Edward.

* * *

**Can we even say we're surprised that Edward is the Prince Charming the saves the Damsel in Distress? **

**And little, confused Bella did a full 180 from the beginning of the chapter! Is that too fast? Well, I explain a little more about that later. If I remember, I can never remember stuff like that. I'll be like "Ohh, if I say this here right now, 4 chapters down the road I can say _this_!" And it never works out like that. But I'll try to remember.  
**

**Drop me a review! I've missed you guys and want to hear from all of you lovely little ladies!!!! Or do we have some gentlemen in the audience?? Probably not, I just thought I'd throw that out there. Either way, I'd love to hear from you!!!**

**~Emmy**


	38. Scars

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: Angel, to answer your question, Bella thought that Edward thought of Victoria with love because that's how Riley pictured her. Riley remembered her in that distorted way, and since Edward's never met her, he didn't know that's not really how she is. He remembered what Riley thought and Riley loved her. Hope that helps. : ) **

**Sorry this is late again. They're coming slowly, but they ARE coming!**

**~Emmy, the Procrastinator

* * *

**Chapter 36: Scars

Song: Crawling in the Dark by Hoobastank (it was a toss-up between this Faint by Linkin Park but I think Faint will be in the next chapter or in the chapter after that, depending on how many chapters I want until the end. If you go look at the Faint lyrics, you're gonna get a good idea for what's coming, in case you get impatient with the next chapter's lateness, you have that, lol.)

I will dedicate  
And sacrifice my everything for just a second's worth  
Of how my story's ending  
And I wish I could know if the directions that I take  
And all the choices that I make won't end up all for nothing

Show me what it's for  
Make me understand it  
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer  
Is there something more than what i've been handed?  
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer

Help me carry on  
Assure me it's ok to use my heart and not my eyes  
To navigate the darkness  
Will the ending be ever coming suddenly?  
Will I ever get to see the ending to my story?

Show me what it's for  
Make me understand it  
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer  
Is there something more than what i've been handed?  
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer

So when and how will I know?  
How much further do I have to go?  
How much longer until I finally know?  
Because I'm looking and I just can't see what's in front of me  
In front of me

Show me what it's for  
Make me understand it  
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer  
Is there something more than what i've been handed?  
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer

Edward POV

Alice's vision was never coming true. It's usually not wise to bet against a psychic, but that vision was not coming true. Either that, or I die along with Bella, fighting for her survival.

As I ran through the forest, I could hear everyone behind me. They got farther and farther behind. I was the faster vampire, after all. I couldn't waste a second when it came to saving Bella.

I followed Riley and Bella's scents through the dense forest. They were easy to follow. Unfortunately, they must have run for awhile before stopping. It seemed hours. Did they really go this far? I shook my head. It didn't matter how far they went. They could have gone to the ends of the earth; I would go that entire distance on foot until I got to my Bella. There was no life without her. If she didn't want me, that was fine, as long as she was alive.

Finally I got to where their scents became stronger. That meant we were getting closer. Suddenly I could hear Riley's disgusting thoughts.

_This is more fun than I thought. Maybe I'll go after Alice next, see if she is as easy to kill as Bella._ I ran toward the voice. I was going to slaughter him._ "This is fun. Are you having fun? I think this is fun!"_ I saw everything that was happening through his mind. He lunged at Bella. I tried to run faster, but I didn't think that was possible. Riley and Bella's scents ran around in circles and up trees, making it much harder for me to pinpoint their exact location. Knowing that I was _so close_ but still too far away was agonizing.

I saw through Riley's mind that he tried to rip Bella's left arm off but she managed to escape his grasp. _That's it, Bella! You can make it until I get there! Just hold on. I'll be there soon to rip the bastard's head off_.

I watched the fight as I continued to search for them. Bella ripped Riley's hand off. I couldn't help but let out a small smile at her bit of success. She truly was holding her own. Unfortunately, I knew she couldn't hold him off forever by herself. I got more anxious by the second that I wasn't at her side.

Riley seethed with anger, a string of profanities running through his head. He jumped on top of Bella, causing them both to fall to the ground. I couldn't help the growl that ripped from my throat.

Bella once again put a smile on my face when I heard Riley's thoughts of pain shooting from his scalp, where Bella was ripping out his hair. _That's my girl._

Riley had tiny thoughts of accomplishment as he snapped at Bella's throat, barely scratching her.

There! I saw them in the distance in front of me! I ran towards them even faster, and cringed when I heard Bella scream in pain. He had cut her sides. I saw as he bent his head and bit her neck. I was close enough to see Bella's pain written across her face as she cried out again.

I was there. _What the…?_ Riley thought as I tore him off of Bella and threw him as hard as I could into a nearby tree. It cracked under the immense force. I ran up to Riley before he could get up, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and slammed him into the tree again.

_Coming to save the damsel in distress, little prince? Or did you miss me?_ He laughed in his mind. I roared and punched him square in the jaw. There was a loud crack, like thunder, as my fist made contact with his face, and another crack as the back of his head hit the tree again. His grin didn't falter. _You're faster than the others. But not stronger._ He shoved me back and elbowed me in the chest and quickly side-kicked my legs so I fell down.

"I'm strong enough to kill you." I growled and leapt up and rammed into him. He fell to the ground and tried to rip one of my arms off, but I moved in time that he missed. I picked him up and threw him against another tree. He hit it with his back, upside down, but managed to right himself before he hit the ground. He ran at me, but I turned. As I turned, I grabbed the front of his shirt and I shoved him against another tree.

_Do you think this will make Bella love you? She loves me still. You'll never have her filthy adoration. You're just a monster._ Riley laughed aloud.

"No, Riley, _you're_ the monster. The monster than I'm about to kill." I hissed and bit off a chunk of his neck and spit it out over my shoulder. I turned back to him to take his head off this time, but I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around to see who was trying to stop me from getting my revenge and growled, only to see Carlisle staring at me, pleading with his eyes to get me to stop.

"Stop, Edward. Remember who you are." He said. I looked at him, not completely comprehending him. Riley needed to die, and I needed to be the one to kill him.

From behind Carlisle I saw Alice, Jasper, and Emmett running up to us and Esme and Rosalie running over to where Bella was still laying.

"Carlisle, I have to do this. He tried to kill her. He nearly succeeded! I've needed this for longer than you know. I had to listen as he thought about her in the vilest ways! I've never wanted anything more than to rip his head off of his filthy shoulders."

"I know, Edward, but you've done enough. You have your revenge, Riley will die, thanks to you. Now go to Bella. She'll be fine, but she's mentally and emotionally traumatized." Carlisle tried to loosen my grip on the front of Riley's shirt. I finally let go, but not before growling once more at Riley.

Jasper and Emmett took Riley from my grasp. I ran to where Bella, Esme, Rosalie, and Alice (who had joined them) were.

"Edward, you're not going to like this –" Alice started, but was interrupted from Emmett calling her over.

"Go." I waved her away. She ran over to Riley, Emmett, and Jasper. I barely saw as she jumped up on Riley and tore his head off his shoulders. _That should've been me. My revenge. _I thought. But all conscious thoughts were erased from my mind as I laid my eyes on Bella for the first time since tearing Riley off from on top of her. She lay there, completely still, staring up at the sky, unblinking. She wasn't physically harmed that much, and it would all easily heal, but the hurt in her eyes told a different story. I didn't have to be able to read her mind (which I still couldn't do) to know that she was torn to pieces inside. I wanted nothing more than to see the happiness light up her eyes again. She looked so wounded as I looked into her lifeless eyes. Riley had damaged her more than he could have possibly imagined. I knew that it would be awhile before she trusted anyone again, and I understood that. That meant it would be awhile before she could love me. That is, if she could ever love me. I truly wanted the best for her and if she wasn't happy with me, I'd have to let her go.

But I was getting ahead of myself. I needed to focus on getting her back to our house and cleaning up those wounds first.

Carlisle was already in front of her, looking at the injuries in plain sight. None of them were life-threatening, but if there was a way to make her more comfortable, that was important at the moment.

"Home." She whispered.  
"Yes, Bella, we're going home now." Alice walked up to her, knelt down, and brushed the hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear lovingly. They truly were like adoring sisters.

"I'm so sorry." Bella whispered, even quieter than before.

"Shhh, Bella, we need to get you back to the house. You can talk once we're there. Remember, you're safe now. We're all safe now." Alice whispered. Alice squatted and scooped Bella up into her arms. It would have been a funny sight to see (Bella being much taller than Alice, but Alice carrying her anyways with no trouble) if it had been any different situation. Alice took a few steps but I stepped in front of her.

"I'll carry her, Alice." I said. She looked at me, doubtful. "I need to be close to her." I whispered. I could barely hear _myself_, but she must have gotten the message because she surrendered and carefully handed Bella off to me in my awaiting arms. I held her close as we started running back to our home, where we would finally be safe and content.

I savored every second I spent with Bella in my arms as we ran back to our house. I held her as close to me as I could and several times I buried my nose in her hair and kissed her forehead. She just hung there limply, staring at the trees as we ran by them. She looked dead. Unmoving. I felt like I was carrying and empty corpse.

After hours of running, we eventually got back to the house. We laid Bella on my bed, upstairs. We figured she wouldn't want to go into her room because Riley's scent still lingered there. I sat in the corner closest to the bed as Carlisle cleaned out her wounds. They would heal soon enough. He soon left and Esme, Rosalie, and Alice came in.

"We're sorry, Edward, but we have to ask you to leave. We have to give Bella a bath and dress her." Esme said. I nodded and left the room and walked to the den downstairs. Emmett and Jasper were sitting on the couch, staring off into space. I sat in a nearby chair.

"How's she doing?" Jasper asked.

"Still not moving or talking. Physically she's fine, but she's broken inside. As broken as a person can get." I said, running a hand through my hair.

Jasper held his head in his hands. "You don't think I could help?" He asked softly.

I shook my head, even though I knew he couldn't see it. "That might help for a little while, but we can't do that forever. Bella has to get happy on her own. It'll take awhile and it won't be pleasant for anyone in the mean time, but it's the only way to get her back to how she was." I said.

"I just want the Bella _I_ knew back. The fun, happy Bella that would talk in crazy accents and look on the bright side, even though things couldn't be more bleak." Emmett whispered.

"We all want that, Emmett. We all want our Bella back." I said. I heard a loud pounding sound and looked up to see that Emmett had stood up and punched the wall so hard his fist went right through it.

"I just can't believe that _bastard!_" He roared. I felt a huge wave of calmness run over me and I knew it was coming from Jasper. Emmett took his hand out from the middle of the wall and dropped in limply to his side.

"What was that??" I heard Esme yell as she ran down the stairs. She gasped when she saw the hole in the wall.

"Sorry, Esme. I lost my temper there for a minute." Emmett looked down, ashamed.

"Emmett!" She sighed, exasperated. Another wave of calm was sent through the room, courtesy of Jasper. Esme rubbed her eyes with the heels of both hands and sighed. "Please, please, don't do that again. You'll be helping me fix that tomorrow." She said, her hands still covering her eyes.

"I know, Esme, I'm sorry. I'll do it all. I just got so mad at that…that…"

"Bastard?" Esme asked. Emmett nodded. Esme dropped her arms to her sides and sat down on the couch. "We all know that what happened was truly horrible, but it's over now. He's dead. Bella's okay. It's not going to be emotionally stable around here for awhile, but that's expected. Does everyone understand that? Bella has gone through tremendous suffering and not everything is going back to normal right away. Everyone needs to be calm all the time. Or, at least act like it."

"She can feel emotions." I said quietly. "It doesn't matter what everyone acts like, she'll be able to tell that's not what we're really feeling and she'll feel whatever we're feeling."

"Oh yes, she has Jasper's power too." Esme thought for a minute. "Do you think she'll call that back to her when Jasper isn't around?"

"No. She's not going to want to know that we're all worrying about her. She hates it when people worry about her." Jasper said. "I'm guessing that means I shouldn't be around her too often." Jasper sighed.

"Maybe it's for the best, at least until she gets a handle on her emotions again. That's not to say you can't come within 30 yards of her at all, just maybe not as much." Esme said.

Jasper nodded. "I understand. I'll visit her, but when I'm not I'll be in the forest or down here. We're farther than 30 yards down here." Jasper said. We all nodded.

"We know this is hard for you too, Jasper, you're like a brother to her." Esme said, putting her hand on his knee.

"But it's for the best. If it'll help Bella, it's what I have to do. That does mean being away from Alice a little more, but it'll all work out better in the end this way." Jasper said.

"Why would that keep you from Alice?" Emmett asked.

"The only person that loves Bella as much as Edward is Alice. Alice and Bella are inseparable. Like sisters, only closer. Alice isn't going to leave Bella's side very often until she knows she feels better. Right now, Bella is Alice's only priority." Jasper had a small smile on his face. Through his thoughts, I knew he was smiling at the idea of Alice being so kind and loving.

"Esme!" Rosalie called from Bella's room. Esme looked to me to see why Rosalie was calling for her.

"They need another person to help them put Bella's pants on. Bella's "as limp as a soggy noodle", as Rosalie put it." I said. I almost laughed at the comment. Almost.

Esme hurried upstairs. That left me, Jasper and Emmett again.

"I'm going to go hunting." Jasper said, rising from the couch. Emmett and I nodded. "Edward?" Jasper hesitated.

I looked up at him questioningly. He looked a little conflicted. I wanted to know what he was going to say, but his thoughts were going by so fast that I didn't even try to hear them.

"I'm going to tell you this, but you can't get your hopes all the way up and act too soon on it." He said, seeming to make a decision. I nodded in agreement. "When we ran up when you were attacking Riley, I couldn't help but feel what Bella was feeling." He looked down at the floor. I eyebrows shot straight up.

"Go on…" I prompted him when he didn't say anything more.

"Well, she felt quite a few different things, and I've concluded the reason for a few of them." Jasper continued. "First, she mostly felt betrayed. Obvious reason there. A few similar feelings were there, but those aren't what stuck out most to me." He said, and stopped talking about.

"Come on, Jasper. Just tell me so you can go hunting." I said.

"Bella felt relieved and she felt…love." He said, looking at his shoes. The breath I didn't need caught in my throat. The relief made sense; she was relieved she wasn't going to die. I would feel relieved too if I had been in her situation! But the love?

"What kind of love, Jasper? Sisterly love, daughterly love, what? Can you even tell that?" I asked.

"Yes, I can tell the differences between different kinds of love. They all feel different. It took a few years of training myself to recognize them easily, but now it's easy. She felt love for a mate." Jasper said.

"Riley." I hissed. How could she still love him, after he tried to brutally slaughter her?

"No." Jasper said.

"I thought you couldn't tell the reason behind each feeling." I asked.

"I can't. But I know she wasn't thinking of Riley when she felt that love. She felt something for Riley, but it was the betrayal, the hatred, the hurt. I think…she was thinking of you when she felt love." Jasper whispered.

My chest tightened and I couldn't breathe. It was the best feeling in the world. Hope.

"Now, Edward, I told you not to get your hopes all the way up! She felt it, but right now all she's feeling is that bad stuff. I can't detect a trace of love at the moment, she's shoved it so far down, she might not even know it's there right now." Jasper raised his hands as if that would stop my hope from rising anymore.

"What about as we ran home?" I asked abruptly after a few moments of thought.

"What?" He asked, slightly confused.

"What did she feel as we ran back here?" My hopes were rising again.

Jasper looked down once again. "The bad stuff. But she was content. Her happiness raised a few times but I don't know why."

I couldn't help the grin the spread across my face. She felt content in my arms. Not only that, but I would bet my whole music collection that her happiness raised every time I kissed her forehead. She loved me. This will work out. We'll be happy once again. The grin stayed on my face for quite awhile after that. I had to go up and see Bella again. I wasn't going to leave her side until she was better again, and we'd be together, forever. The thought made my grin wider.


	39. Paralyzed

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: I do think this is the latest a chapter has ever been. Wow. I'm truly sorry for that. I've actually been extremely busy though! And a week or two in there my computer was flat out unusable. Some sort of nasty virus. Had to wipe everything. It was super fun. But enjoy this very very very very very late chapter! I'm soooo sorry if it sucks but I made myself sit down and write and not get up until I posted it. Right now it's 4:30am on the dot. I have the next one nearly done, I just have to add a little more and edit it so it should be out within the few days, depending on how my weekend looks. I'm thinking tomorrow but that's not a promise. **

**~Emmy

* * *

**

Chapter: Paralyzed

Song: Frozen by Within Temptation

I can't feel my senses  
I just feel the cold  
All colours seem to fade away  
I can't reach my soul

I would stop running  
If I knew there was a chance  
It tears me apart to sacrifice it all  
But I'm forced to let go

Tell me I'm frozen  
But what can I do?  
Can't tell the reasons  
I did it for you

When lies turn into truth  
I sacrifice for you  
You say that I am frozen  
But what can I do?

I can feel your sorrow  
(I sacrifice)  
You won't forgive me

But I know you'll be alright

It tears me apart that you will never know  
But I have to let go

Tell me I'm frozen  
But what can I do?  
Can't tell the reasons  
I did it for you

When lies turn into truth  
I sacrifice for you  
You say that I am frozen  
But what can I do?

Everything will slip away  
Shattered pieces will remain  
When memories fade into emptiness  
Only time will tell its tale  
If it all has been in vain

I can't feel my senses  
I just feel the cold

Frozen  
But what can I do?  
Frozen

Tell me I'm frozen  
But what can I do?  
Can't tell the reasons  
I did it for you

When lies turn into truth  
I sacrifice for you  
You say that I am frozen

Frozen

Bella POV

When we got back to the Cullen's house, they put me in Edward's bed. I smelled him all around me and it somehow comforted me. But only a little. My thoughts were mostly elsewhere. I kept replaying everything that happened with Riley from when we left the house to when Edward ripped him off me and the Cullen's came.

_It's all my fault…all my fault…all my fault…_ My thoughts chanted over and over again.

Edward sat with me for a little while. His presence calmed me but I didn't know why. Finally Esme, Rosalie, and Alice shooed him out and took me to the bathroom. They ran hot water with sweet smelling soup. _Freesia_. I could tell.

They stripped me and lowered me slowly into the water. I couldn't feel the warmth of the water, I was too numb.

"Oh Bella…" Alice sighed sadly when she saw all the injuries that hadn't been seen while I was clothed. She ran her fingers lightly over the deep gashes in my side that Riley had managed to make with his fingernails. _He really put some effort into that._ I thought.

I was covered in dirt and leaves. There was mud and blood crusted in my hair that Rosalie and Alice tried has hard as they could to get out. They got most of it. A loud thump was heard and Esme ran downstairs to see what had happened. I saw Rosalie look over to Alice curiously asking her silently what happened.

"Emmett punched a hole through a wall." She said.

Rosalie sighed and went back to scrubbing the dirt off my legs. Alice was tenderly cleaning the mud out of all my injuries. I just stared at the water, not really seeing anything, yet still aware of everything that was happening around me. Esme stayed downstairs, probably scolding Emmett.

After Rosalie and Alice got me as clean as they possibly could, they helped me get out of the bathtub, wrapped a towel around me and we walked back to Edward's bedroom. There were loose clothes laid out for me on the bed. Alice sacrificed fashion for my comfort. That meant she truly wasn't thinking about anything besides me. That touched me deeper than I thought I could feel at a time like this.

Rosalie and Alice grabbed the clothes and came over to dress me.

My thoughts drifted towards the fights again. I felt each of Riley's attacks. The scratches, the throwing against trees. The bite. The bite had to have been the worst. At the thought, my neck throbbed where his teeth had sunk into my skin. There will be a faint scar there forever because of the venom. A constant reminder of what I've done. The trouble and heartache I've put everyone through. None of them deserve this. I'm an unwanted burden to them and I'd leave the second I could stand on my own.

No, they'd come after me. I knew they wouldn't want to, they didn't care about me that much. They couldn't. They'd feel obligated. Well, maybe Alice and Jasper would come because they cared, but I was sure the others hated me. After everything I accused Edward of, how could they not?

Edward. The thought of his name sent a shiver up my spine for a reason I couldn't pin point. I shoved the thought down. I didn't need _more_ complications right now.

But I owed Edward an apology. As soon as Alice and Rosalie were done dressing me, I'd ask for Edward to come in and I'd get on the ground and grovel at his feet as an apology. God knows that's what I deserve. Anything less and I wouldn't be doing enough. I needed to beg forgiveness. I hoped he could forgive me, though he had every right to deny me that. Once I was dressed I would try, though.

I zoned back in to see how far Alice and Rosalie had gotten me into clothes. My shirt was on and underwear. _I'm going to have to thank them for awhile for that too. They must wish they were anywhere but here. I should be doing this. I'll put my pants on myself, they shouldn't have to._ I thought. I told my arm to reach out to Rosalie and ask for the sweat pants that were in her hands. My arm did not reach out. I told it again. _Take the pants from Rosalie!_ Nothing. I couldn't do anything. I was too numb. I couldn't even make my face look frustrated. I just stared into nothing. _Well, I'm going to be lots of fun for awhile, aren't I?_ I tried at least to will myself to be a little stiff as Rosalie tried to put the pants on to help, but they wouldn't even listen to such a simple command. Alice tried to help but they needed another pair of hands. Rosalie called down to Esme in exasperation.

_I'm so sorry Rose. I'll make this up to you. I'll make this up to all of you. You deserve better than me._ I thought. It was true. They shouldn't have to be taking care of me and the vegetable that I've turned into. Esme came up and it was a group effort to get me into those damn pants. They helped me into the bed and tucked me in. Of course I couldn't sleep, but it was relaxing. I closed my eyes and breathed slowly and evenly.

Alice stayed by my bedside, holding my hand. Rosalie and Esme stayed for awhile too but Esme had a wall to fix and Rosalie had a husband to scold. I tried to tell Alice to go to Jasper, but I couldn't get my mouth to form the words. I wished for a second that Edward could read my mind. That way he could tell Alice for me.

The thought caught me by surprise. I wanted Edward to be able to read my mind?

I let the thought slip away as another thing had my attention. Once again it was Riley. I couldn't let it be. I had to poke and prod and the memory. I dissected everything memory I held of him. Ten years worth of memories. And all of them I saw with perfect clarity. I looked for hints and signs that everything with him was leading to him trying to kill me. I realized that everything that happened in the first few months were all the hints I should have needed. But I somehow forgot them all. I didn't realize then what his actions were telling me. He hated me. I had changed him, not just into a vampire but emotionally and mentally. I took him away from everything he loved and he resented me for it. I understood why he did what he did. I didn't like it, of course, but I deserved it. I was guilty of everything he thought I had done wrong. He had every right to try and kill me.

And yet I couldn't help the feeling of betrayal and hatred from coming back. I had _loved_ him. I gave everything I had to him. And then he tried to kill me. Slaughter me. He had _fun_ while trying to do it too! Killing for vengeance is one thing (though not a pleasant thing, a little more justified, especially in the vampire world), but killing for pleasure was an entirely different thing. Yes, vampires killed often. But for food. Of course I was completely against that, but it was the norm for the majority of the vampire community. But killing another vampire because it was _fun_? That was a little beyond psychotic.

I laid it Edward's bed for awhile. I didn't know how long. Days, weeks, months, it was hard to tell. Alice was always there, only gone for an hour or two at a time to hunt and that was a rare occurrence. At first I wondered why Jasper didn't sit with her. I realized why the first time he came to visit me. It was just a few hours after coming back from the fight. I could smell blood and knew he had just come back from hunting. As soon as he was within 30 yards, I felt everything around me. Everyone was suffering. Everyone had dark pain inside them. They were worried. Is all the over me? Though the thought that they all cared enough to worry about me, was touching, I didn't like that they were worrying in the first place. I didn't deserve it. Jasper stayed for about an hour, staying as close to Alice as he could without sitting in her lap and talking to me the whole time. I still couldn't move or talk but that just meant I was an excellent listener. He mentioned anything that came to mind. "My, that bedspread is a vibrant blue. It suits you, Bella.", "That's one bright lamp, wouldn't you say? Back during the war, the lamps weren't so bright…". The civil war came up numerous times and I inwardly smiled each time. His eyes lit up and he suddenly had a million things to say and acted as if he didn't have enough time to say it all even if he had until the end of time itself.

Even though I listened to him, rapt in his descriptions of the war, I still felt what everyone was feeling. It was hell for me, those few hours Jasper sat beside me and Alice. I absolutely loved his company but I couldn't have despised his power any more than I did. _I need to learn how to control it._ I thought. _So I don't automatically take it when someone's around. Like a switch to turn it on and off even if the power is standing an inch away from me. _

I worked on that all the while I was in Edward's bed. Every time Jasper came, I tried to flip the switch that let me use his power and tried to turn it off. A few times it worked. I was released for the agonizing pain that everyone was feeling for a minute or two even with Jasper sitting right there, but unless I concentrated I lost it and all their feelings came flooding back.

Jasper and Alice weren't my only visitors, though. All the other Cullen's came through my – Edward's – door often. Rosalie came and sat with me for hours, sometimes talking to Alice and telling me about another thing that Emmett's done. Emmett came in and told jokes. I wished I could laugh. Carlisle came and acted the full father figure as Esme came and acted the mother.

And Edward. Edward was always there, just as Alice was. He only left to hunt. Edward and Alice were my constant companions. When it was just the three of us we usually sat in silence. It seems Alice and Edward had somehow developed a way to talk silently to each other. I didn't mind. I could read their minds but I taught myself to block it out easier and easier. The flipping the power switch also helped with blocking out their thoughts. The silence helped me think and concentrate on things like practicing controlling my powers and trying to make myself move. Even an inch. Even a twitch. Nothing. Edward asked Carlisle once early on if he thought there was something physically wrong with me. Carlisle said he couldn't find anything. He said it was psychological. I was mentally immobile. I was doing it to myself. If I tried, I could move. I didn't believe him. He was the best doctor I knew but I tried and tried and I couldn't move. I could open and close my eyes but that was it.

After the first few days of me just lying there, they figured that I was probably hungry. They couldn't exactly bring a live (or dead) animal in to the room with me (Esme would freak about the carpets) so they got blood bags from the blood bank quite a few miles away. Edward would hold my mouth open and Alice poured it in. One of the most awkward moments of my life, but I suppose it had to be done.

One day I was thinking about the sheets on Edward's bed. Would they want to change them soon? It's been awhile. But it's not like they were dirty. I didn't sweat or anything. Then I started thinking about why he had a bed in the first place. I mean, it was a little obvious why the couples had beds…but Edward was single. Why would he have a bed? Was he planning on finding someone? Carlisle knew enough other vampires, and Edward could certainly get anyone he wanted. Is that what the bed was for? Did he already have a girlfriend? Why did that thought hurt as much as it did?

I pushed all those thoughts from my mind. Why did I have to bring it up? So what if Edward had a bed? So what if he had a girlfriend? Who cared. Certainly not me. I was grateful that he sat with me, but that was as far as my feelings reached for him. Gratitude. That's it. Nothing more.

I concentrated on controlling my powers once again.

The day I moved was a great day. I was thinking about Edward, of all things. The curtains had been open and the windows let sunlight flood into the room. I had just noticed how his skin glittered in the light. All vampires did, but his was something else. I wanted to reach out and run my fingers over the smooth, faceted skin. As the thought crossed through my mind, my hand reached out slowly toward where his hand rested on my bedside. Alice and him gasped and stood up.

"Bella? Bella! You moved! Do it again, do it again!" Alice cried. I inched my hand towards Edward. I _really_ wanted to know what his skin felt like. Alice cried out again in joy. I glanced up at Edward. His face was of complete joy. He grabbed the hand that had moved toward him. He held on tight and kissed my fingertips, individually.

"We missed you, Bella." He smiled. Hearing my name come out of his mouth sent a shiver up my spine. I didn't understand this one as I didn't understand the last shiver that went up my spine when I thought of Edward. I didn't try to understand it, I was just happy I could move again. I moved my other arm to prop myself up. Alice and Edward helped me sit up. I smiled at them.

"Well it certainly took long enough." I whispered, hoarse. My throat burned. They hadn't fed me in a few days and going without talking for so long had its side effects.

"It certainly did." Alice giggled. "Oh, this is so wonderful! I'm going to run and tell the others." Alice leapt up and dashed out of the room. Edward stayed and helped me stand up.

"We should take you hunting. Do you want to change?" He asked. I nodded. I walked slowly over to where they had a suitcase of my clothes. They had taken them out of my room and put them in here, even though I hadn't changed at all the whole time. I think they were preparing for when I could finally change myself again. I bent slowly and picked up a pair of jeans and a close-fitting, black V-neck shirt. I slid the sweat pants down and stepped into the jeans. I was about to pull my shirt up when Edward coughed from behind me.

"I'll just step outside…" He said roughly. I had forgotten he was in the room with me. He opened the bedroom door and pulled it shut behind him as he stepped into the hallway.

When I was finished changing and I brushed my hair to get the slight knots that were in it, I opened the door to find all the Cullen's standing in the hallway, waiting for me to come out.

I was surprised when Emmett stepped forward and pulled me into a huge bear hug, lifting me off the ground.

"Welcome back, Bella." Someone said, I didn't catch who.

"Thank you, you don't know how grateful I am for everything everyone's done." I smiled at them all.

"Not a problem! We care about you, Bella, and would do anything for you." Jasper said. I smiled warmly at him.

Edward coughed. "I think Bella should hunt. She hasn't been fed in few days. It will also exercise her unused muscles."

"Certainly! That's a wonderful idea, Edward. Alice should go too, she hasn't fed in awhile either." Esme said. With that, everyone cleared a path and let Edward, Alice, and me walk down the hall.

It was like my first hunt all over again. I was clumsy and extremely messy. I shredded my clothes and got blood _everywhere_. I also realized in the middle of it all that this was the first time I had been hunting with Edward. I don't know why the thought was so important to me. Was I embarrassed about what Edward would think of me? No, that wasn't it. That would mean I cared about him more than I would admit to myself. And I didn't think about him like that. At all.

At least, that's what I told myself.

* * *

**A/N: Alright, one chapter left then the epilogue! I think. I'm pretty sure. Maybe I'll squish another chapter in there. I've been turning the idea of a sequel around and around my head and I just can't decide. I have a few ideas if I do make a sequel, but I don't know if I should. The thing is, I need to make my decision before I write the epilogue, because that's where I'd introduce it if I did decide to do one. If I don't, then I'll make it a nice, clean ending. So, as you can see, I need to know if there's going to be a sequel before I write the epilogue. What do you guys think? Go to my profile and voooote! Sequel or no sequel. I can't exactly give you the plot idea for the sequel because I haven't decided that either. So just tell me if you'd read a sequel to this story if I were to write one.**

**I love you all!  
**

**~Emmy**

**Oh, and I just thought I'd mention the surrent book series I'm reading! We're all avid readers here, right? Well Aliames (aka Ruby) introduced me to the Mortal Instruments trilogy and let me tell you they are amazing books! So many plot twists and they're exciting and amazing and just pure awesome. They're about the same size as the Twilight books. I read the first one in one day, the second one in one day, and the third one in two days (ok, you caught me, I haven't finished the third one yet, but I know for certain I'll finish it today and I started it yesterday so it's all good). They're like a mix between Harry Potter, Twilight, and...maybe Narnia. Maybe. Not sure, but they're amazing. They have these things called stele's and I kinda figured out in the middle of the 2nd book they're kinda like wands...only totally different...yet that's how I think of them. Yeah. But you should read them! **

**1st book: City of Bones**

**2nd book: City of Ashes**

**3rd book: City of Glass**

**And while I'm at it, I should mention 2 other book series I'm currently wrapped up in: the House of Night series. I'm sure many of you have at least seen them in book stores. They're also pure awesome. And the other series I'm reading are the Hunger Games. Well, that's what the first book is called. The 2nd one comes out in...September or October, I don't remember. It's called Catching Fire (I'm pretty sure) and I literally couldn't tear myself away from The Hunger Games. I laughed and I cried. And man, I think that was the hardest I've ever cried over a book. Though my friend Malina didn't cry at all...so go figure. **

**Yes, those are all the awesome series I'm recommending. The Mortal Instruments, The House of Night, and The Hunger Games. Go out and buy yourself some books! And if you've read any of these books then write a review or PM me telling me what you thought of them! Though I'm warning you, if you spoil the end of City of Glass for me I'm going to hunt you down and gouge your eyes out so you can never read again. Ok, that was a little harsh, but seriously, spoiling books should be against a federal law or something.  
**


	40. Happily Ever After

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and I also don't own the song. **

**A/N: *Sigh* I think fanfiction hates me. I can NOT get that poll up no matter how hard I try. I have NO idea why it's not showing up. At least, it's not showing up for me. If it's showing up for you then that's great! But it's not for me so I assumed it wasn't for everyone else too. If I'm right and it's not there for you, please vote whether there should be a sequel in a review. :) **

**~Emmy**

* * *

Chapter: Happily Ever After

Song: Faint by Linkin Park

I am a little bit of loneliness, a little bit of disregard  
Handful of complaints but I can't help the fact  
That everybody can see these scars  
I am what I want you to want, what I want you to feel  
But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you  
To just believe this is real  
So I, let go watching you turn your back like you always do  
Face away and pretend that I'm not  
But I'll be here cause you're all that I've got

I can't feel the way I did before  
Don't turn your back on me  
I won't be ignored  
Time won't heal this damage anymore  
Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored

I am, a little bit insecure, a little unconfident  
Cuz you don't understand I do what I can  
Sometimes I don't make sense  
I am, what you never wanna say, but I've never had a doubt  
It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear me out  
So I, let go watching you turn your back like you always do  
You face away and pretend that I'm not  
But I'll be here cause you're all that I've got

I can't feel the way I did before  
Don't turn your back on me  
I won't be ignored  
Time won't heal this damage anymore  
Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored

Hear me out now  
You're gonna listen to me like it or not  
Right now, hear me out now  
You're gonna listen to me like it or not  
Right now

I can't feel the way I did before  
Don't turn your back on me  
I won't be ignored

I can't feel the way I did before  
Don't turn your back on me  
I won't be ignored  
Time won't heal this damage anymore  
Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored  
I can't feel  
Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored  
Time won't tell  
Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored

Edward POV

I couldn't help but stare transfixed as Bella took down a mountain lion. It was her first hunt since she could move again and we knew she was hungry. Her muscles still seemed to not cooperate with her as well as they had before, making her a little clumsy as she ran and jumped. I found it absolutely beautiful. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her elegant figure (her figure was elegant even if her movements weren't) as she ran through the trees and pounced on an unsuspecting animal. I kept my distance so she couldn't read my mind as I thought about what I wanted to do her and that perfect body.

_Edward, you're staring._ Alice thought. She was standing right next to me, looking up at me. I nodded. _The more you stare, the more likely it is that she'll notice and you know she's not ready to face that._ I nodded again._ I know what you're thinking Edward and don't you dare confront her yet. Don't get me wrong, I'm rooting for you, but she's _not ready_. _She thought, putting emphasis on the last two words.

"I wasn't going to do anything, Alice." I whispered.

_Bull. I saw that you were. Don't even think about it. You can talk to her in a few months. She should be a little more stable then. But not now._ I sighed and nodded tersely. _Good_. She smiled at my compliance.

"That also means she's not ready to go shopping anytime soon." I whispered so low she barely caught it.

Her smile dropped in an instant. _What are you talking about? Ever heard of a thing called "retail therapy"?_

"Bella hates it and you know it."

_How did you know that? You've never been shopping with us!_

"I knew Bella when she was human and she hated it then. I know you love it and I know you drag her to the mall every so often. It's an ordeal for her and if she can't talk to _me_ she can't go shopping with _you._" I smiled at her.

She just grunted angrily in response and ran off to Bella. I smiled to myself. That'll make Alice try to get Bella to get better faster which will mean I can talk to her sooner about…_us_.

The thought sent shivers up my spine. I knew I couldn't live without her and I knew she had some sort of feelings for me, I just needed her to realize it. She won't come to terms by herself so I knew I had to push her along until she had an epiphany. We were meant for each other and she _had_ to know.

* * *

Weeks passed. Months passed. Bella barely looked at me the entire time. Alice said she would tell me when she thought Bella was emotionally and mentally ready for what I had to tell her but day after day I was left with nothing. Every time I saw Bella I felt whole. I felt like everything was right in the world. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her. She didn't seem to return that in the least.

Jasper refused to tell me what her emotions were when we were in the same room together those rare times but once in a while he let the guard in his mind drop and I'd hear her emotions. I caught desire once. That was all I needed. I _had_ to talk to her _now._

She looked up at me, catching that last thought, and raised an eyebrow in question. I nodded my head towards the door that lead to the back of the house. She nodded slightly and excused herself from her conversation with Rosalie and Esme. Moments later I got up from the piano (which I had been playing) and followed her. No one's thoughts showed they had noticed.

When I got outside, she wasn't in sight. I looked around. The grass blew in the breeze and the trees in the forest yards away swayed slightly. That's when I caught a glimpse of her. She was just entering the forest on the other side of the yard. I ran at a human pace towards her as she disappeared into the foliage.

It took me a few minutes before I found her. She had gone farther than I thought. We were about half a mile away from the house, way beyond earshot.

Her back was to me as I walked up silently. Her hair was down and whipped around her because of the wind. I stopped walking a few feet from her. She slowly turned to face me.

We stood in silence for a few minutes. I didn't know what to say, where to start.

"Let me, then." She said suddenly. She had heard the thought. I nodded, indicating her to continue. "I'm sorry."

I stood there, shocked. Sorry? She was sorry? For what? She must have read the question in my eyes.

"I shouldn't have said the things I did to you that day. I had no right to accuse you of any of those things. I can't even bring myself to repeat them, they were so horrible." She hung her head.

"Bella." I took a few steps forward and placed my hand under her chin and raised it so we were looking each other in the eye. "You don't have to be sorry for anything. I understand why you thought what you did and you shouldn't need forgiveness for what you thought was the truth." I told her sincerely.

"But I was _wrong._ So very wrong." She whispered.

I shook my head. "Everyone makes mistakes. You realized you were incorrect and you did something about it. I'm so proud of you, Bella. You're courage is amazing."

She looked confused. "My courage for apologizing?"

"You're courage for _everything_. You are so strong. You've been through so much and you still stand with your head held high. It's astounding." I leaned a little closer.

"I…I…" She couldn't finish her thought. I leaned forward and pressed my mouth softly against hers. She seemed too surprised to do anything, she stood there in shock. A moment later she seemed to melt into my arms. I held her and deepened the kiss. I had been waiting for this moment my whole life it seemed. If just the sight of her made me feel whole, kissing her made my un-beating heart feel like it was bursting.

She abruptly pulled away, leaving me the one standing in shock this time.

"No. No, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry but no." She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head violently.

"Bella? What's wrong?" I asked, taking a step forward.

"No." She back away slowly, eyes still shut. "I can't do this. I…I just can't."

"Bella, stop. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. That's not how I wanted to start. But I have to tell you something. You need to hear this—"

"NO! I'm done! This is NOT happening!" She covered her hands over her ears, as if trying to block out my words.

"Please, I'm so sorry. Please just hear me out." I pleaded. I was so close. I just needed her to listen to me.

She dropped her arms and opened her eyes which seemed to be full of venom, trying to burn me.

"Look, I just came to apologize because I couldn't do it before. I didn't want it to turn into…_this_." She turned and stalked off.

"Bella." I called. _Come back_. She heard my thought and turned around.

"I'm sorry. I can't. I can't feel the way I did before." She said. My heart sank. She couldn't love me like she did when we were human?

"Does that mean you remember? When we were human?" I asked.

She looked confused. "No. I don't remember. Why?"

I couldn't erase the surprise from my face. What did she mean then?

"Edward, I can't love like I did. I loved Riley. I can't do it again. I can't give my heart only to have it broken again."

My hope rose again. "But I'm not Riley! I will never hurt you." I walked toward her and reached up to cup her face in my hands. "I will _never_ hurt you."

She tried to turn her head away from my grasp but I didn't want to let her go. She settled on shifting her eyes away so she wasn't looking at me.

"I'm truly sorry. I know what it feels like. I know what you're feeling right now. But I can't do anything about it." She whimpered. She didn't seem to be angry anymore.

"But you can!" I said urgently. She looked back to me, eyes pleading with me to stop and let her go. _Never_.

"What do you want me to do, Edward? I can't make my heart feel something it won't." She whispered. My heart dropped. But only for a second. I knew she was wrong.

"Don't say that. I know you love me. I know it. Not only because what we had before we were taken from each other but also because you felt it when we saved you from Riley. Jasper told me. You felt love when I showed up to save you." I might sound arrogant, I thought, but it was the truth, she can't deny it.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She shifted her eyes away again. I dropped my hands from her face but took hold of her wrists, holding them to my still heart.

"Do lie to yourself, Bella. I know the truth of what you feel. Hell, _everyone_ knows. Everyone except you. And you know it, but you won't accept it. Even though it's what's right." I stared into her averted eyes. She looked towards me once again, locking her gaze to mine.

"I can't help the fact that everyone can see these scars. That they can see how _he_ hurt me. How he _still_ hurts me. But please don't fool yourself into thinking that you're the light at the end of my tunnel. I don't love you. I'm sorry." She stared into my eyes. If she hadn't, I might not have caught the hint deep in her stare that told me she was lying.

"I have plenty of time to change your mind." I gave a glimpse of a smile.

"Time won't heal this damage anymore." She said, glancing away once again. "I can leave. So you don't have to deal with me. I don't want it to be awkward or uncomfortable for you."

"I'll follow you. I'd follow you to Hell and back again. I'll be here for you. You're all that I've got."

"No, Edward. What about your family? Emmett, Rosalie, Esme, and Carlisle? And what about Jasper and Alice? I know you care about them as siblings now as well. You have them."

I hung my head, a little defeated. I wasn't giving up, not by a long shot, but the conversation drained me. I wasn't getting through to her. I know what I was saying was the truth, I just needed her to realize it too.

"You need to listen to me, Bella. _Really_ listen. No matter what I do, I can't convince you to just believe that this is real. Just hear me out. I _love _you. I never want anyone but you. I would sing love songs to you for eternity if you let me. I can't even express in words what you mean to me. I promise I will _never_ leave you. I'll be here always. You're as beautiful and amazing as a shooting star and just as wondrous and astounding. You amaze me every day. I love trying to guess what you'll do next even though I'm always wrong. You surprise me in the best possible ways. When you love, you love with all your heart. You care for everyone, you would do anything for anyone who asked. You are a little clumsy for a vampire, but it makes me love you even more. You're so adorable when you don't get your way and you're as stubborn as a mule. You worry so much and for everyone. If you were still human I'd be afraid all the worry would crush you. And yet you're so strong. I've seen you go through every disaster and tragedy known to man and you're still a strong beacon of hope and love. You're light touches everyone you meet. You don't know how to handle some of your feelings but you never ask for help because you don't want to trouble anyone else even though everyone would love to help you. We look for ways to help you. The smallest things to make you feel welcome and loved, because you are. No one wants to see you in pain. You are an incredible creature. I love everything that you are. You can do no wrong in my heart. I will be anything to you. A brother, a friend, a confidant, a lover…a husband. If it made you happy, I would do anything. I just want to be near you. I don't think I could survive if I were away from you. I'd be your anything." I held her gaze throughout the entire speech. I had to know that she was listening, that she understood. She had to understand.

She sucked in her breath but didn't say anything. She looked like she wanted to cry if she could. I didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

"I…I…I don't know what to say." I said meekly. "I believe you. I understand. I just don't know what to say. I don't know what to do."

"Listen to your heart. I know this sounds like a cliché, but you have to. Look deep inside you and try to figure out what you feel. I know what you _want_ to feel but you have to know what you _really_ feel." I said.

"What is it I want to feel?" She asked.

"You want to feel that you're alone. You don't want to love me. It would only make it more complicated for you. You can't deal with complications right now. Before you tell your heart good-bye, listen to what it has to say. There's nothing else you can do." I said.

She looked down to her feet. After a moment of contemplating, she closed her eyes as if that would help her concentrate on her feelings more. We stood as still as statues for what seemed like hours. Her, with her eyes squeezed tightly shut and me, staring at her in anticipation. I cleared my thoughts so she didn't have to hear them as she concentrated. When a thought _did_ pass through my head, it was how I would love to hold her in my arms. I squeezed her hands that I still held in my own once in a while in reassurance.

Finally she looked up, mental exhaustion in her eyes. I waited patiently for what she had to say. We stood there in silence, just staring at each other for awhile longer. I opened my mouth to inquire her decision when she leaned in close and kissed me.

Surprised, I didn't do anything for a few seconds. Finally, I realized what was happening and I wrapped my arms around her tenderly. She was glass and I didn't want to break her. The kiss was soft and gentle and absolute heaven. She leaned in more and deepened the kiss. I let her. Whatever she wants. Anything she wants. I was quite enjoying it myself. She pushed against me in all the right places and I held her to me. I poured everything into this kiss and I could tell she was doing the same. All the moments that I was without her. All the times I wanted to take her in my arms and never let go. All the times I wanted to tell her exactly how I felt. All the times I wanted to show her how I felt. All the times I wanted to throw Riley against a wall and throw her over my shoulder and run far away. All the times I thought I would die out of the pain of losing her the first time when I thought she was dead. All the times I wanted to be with her but couldn't. All the times I wished I could cry just so I could mourn for her properly. All the times I thought I would be without her forever. _I'm never letting go of you._ I thought, knowing she would hear.

_Good._ The thought ran through my mind as a whisper. I pulled back from her, breaking our kiss but not our embrace.

"Bella?" I asked. Had that been her thought? But that was impossible!

A sly smile spread across her lips. "I've been practicing." She said.

I was still incredulous. "Been practicing _what_? What was that? Can I…can I read your mind now?" I asked.

Her smile grew. "Only when I want you to." I just stared at her, amazed. "Oh, pick your jaw up off the floor and I'll show you." She rolled her eyes jokingly. I closed my open mouth and waited for her to explain what had just happened.

"You said you've been practicing…" I prompted her.

"I knew you couldn't read my mind, obviously. I began to wonder if I could change that. So I tried. It didn't work the first few times. I tried to do it when you were around and think something that would catch your attention but it never worked. When at first you don't succeed, try again. So I did. I tried again and again. Eventually I could feel it in my head when it worked and when it didn't, even without you around. So I stretched it farther and farther until I knew that if I wanted to, I could let you read my mind from the maximum distance that you could hear thoughts from. I thought I would surprise you." She grinned at her.

"But…but why would you do that? I mean, this is completely amazing. I couldn't be happier in this moment, but what would make you want to do that? Why would you want me to read your thoughts?" I asked curiously.

Her smile faltered for a minute but only because she was thinking. "I asked the same thing to myself when the idea first came to me. My excuse to myself was that it would be extremely useful in battle. Not that I thought we would ever need to hunt and kill someone like we did with…_him_…but you know, just in case. But now I'm thinking that I had an ulterior motive. I think I wanted to make you happy. I wanted you to know what was really going on in my head because you always looked so concentrated when I said something that you didn't understand, like you're trying to read my thoughts to get my meaning even though you knew you couldn't. It amused me, the look on your face was always priceless," She giggled to herself. "But I knew that it frustrated you. So I think that I wanted to make you happy in the little way that I could. Of course, I didn't realize that's why I really practiced, but it all makes sense to me now. I was hiding from myself but now I'm found." She smiled up at me warmly. "You found me. And you helped me find myself."

I grinned and bent down to kiss her lightly on the lips. She sighed, content.

We walked back to the house, hands entwined.

_What do you think they'll say?_ Bella thought. The idea that I could read her mind still baffled me and made me so happy.

_I don't know, but let's give them a show._ I thought with a sly smile.

She looked up at me with a curious smile. _What are you thinking, you mischievous boy?_

_I'll show you._ We stopped right in front of the door to enter the house. I knew everyone was in the room on the other side of that door. I suddenly spun Bella around and pressed her slightly roughly against the wall, making a low thumping sound. She looked at me, surprised. I put my arms on either side of her head and leaned in to kiss her.

_Ah, I see._ She smiled against my lips and grabbed a fistful of my shirt and pulled me roughly closer to her. We were pressed together, fitting like matching puzzle pieces. My body was made for hers. She deepened the kiss and moaned softly in my mouth.

_What the hell's going on?_ Jasper thought. He caught our emotions of desire and lust from inside and was confused. _Could it be…?_ "Alice?" Jasper called her over to him softly.

I could see her through Jasper's mind walk over to him curiously. "Yes?"

"Is that what I think that is?" He asked, his voice low. Jasper's mind showed that she smiled mischievously.

"I think you know the answer to that." She whispered back. His eyes went wide in shock.

"What? What are you two whispering about? Secrets don't make friends!" Emmett called over to them.

"Should we...?" Jasper asked Alice.

She winked and said, "I think that's what they want."

"What who want? Come on! Tell me!" Emmett whined.

"Emmett, don't be a baby." Rosalie didn't look up from her magazine.

Back outside, we were still kissing passionately. Bella reached up under my loose shirt and rested her hands on my chest. It was my turn to moan in pleasure.

"Okay, what was that?" Rosalie asked, putting down her magazine and standing up as if to look for the sound.

"Oh dear. Carlisle dear, what should we do? We need to get the children to leave Bella and Edward alone. Now's not the time to be interrupted, they just found each other again." Esme whispered to Carlisle. He just chuckled in response.

"Wait, _what?_ _Bella and Edward?!_ Where are they? What are they doing?" Emmett stood up in shock.

"Emmett, sit down. We need to leave them be. We should leave so they're alone." Esme said.

"Actually, I think that they want us to hear it. It's their way of telling us without having to hear what we have to say about it." Alice said, picking up Rosalie's magazine and flipping through it.

"Well, they I wanna see! Where are they? Just outside?" Emmett asked walking toward the door.

_Get ready…_ I told Bella with my thoughts.

_Believe me, I couldn't be more ready. The question is, are you?_

_What…?_ I didn't have time to realize what she meant. Emmett burst through the door, the rest of them close behind, trying to stop him. They stared open mouthed as Bella suddenly pulled me even closer (I didn't think it was possible) and ground against me slowly. I was more surprised than they were!

"WHOA! AAAHH! MY EYES! THEY BURN!" Emmett yelled, covering his eyes and running back into the house. Esme clucked her tongue and pulled Carlisle back into the house to leave us alone. Rosalie was too surprised to move and Jasper suddenly took Alice up in his arms and kissed her passionately. Emmett reached back outside and yanked Rosalie indoors. Jasper pulled away from Alice is surprise of his own actions. If Alice could've blushed, she's be a deep scarlet.

"Well, I guess I have to thank Bella and Edward for that one." Alice said. Jasper laughed and set Alice back on the ground. Bella pulled back from me to smile at Alice and Jasper.

"Finally. Took you guys long enough. I've had to deal with both of you conflicted emotions for months now." Jasper said.

I laughed and said, "Glad we could relieve you, Jasper, of the hard job of dealing with our emotions. God knows we couldn't deal with them ourselves."

Alice and Jasper nodded and walked back inside. Bella giggled and took my mouth with hers.

_I think this is a happily ever after moment._ Bella thought.

_I think you're right._ And I knew I would be. I knew _we_ would be.

* * *

**A/N: Well there it is! That seems like a pretty wrapped up ending, doesn't it? Like how I shoved in some lyrics into their dialogue? Some of the lyrics are from Faint and some are from Listen to Your Heart by DHT.**

**If I don't end up doing a sequel, I don't think there will be an epilogue. It would just be them talking about how happy they are. But if I do decide to do a sequel then the epilogue would introduce it. So…you should all vote, poll or no poll. If I don't post an epilogue then I'll change the stories status to "complete" and you'll know there won't be a sequel. Or maybe I'll post an author's note. I guess we'll see!**

**~Emmy 3**


	41. AN: Nominated

This is not a chapter, very sorry. But I have news! This story has been nominated for the Fanpire Fiction Awards for Best Drama.

HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!

That's freaking amazing, I'm seriously shocked. I don't even know how to describe what I'm feeling right now, I'm just…wow…

Breathe! Woo, okay, I'm good now.

I just wanted to say a huge "THANK YOU!!!!" to whoever nominated this story, I makes me so happy to think that you actually enjoyed this story that much. Wow!

Go here to look at the other nominations and categories:

.

Go here to vote (voting doesn't begin until July 20th, so make sure to go back there at that time):

.

Please go look at the other nominations and categories. I've read some of the other stories and they are amazing! I'm definitely going to read them all and you all should too and vote for your favorites!

I still can't believe I was actually nominated, I've never thought that my writing is that good and it seriously means a lot to me.

Thank you so much, you guys, I love you all!

Oh, and I've decided that there will be a sequel to Blackbird. I'm writing the epilogue to this story and it should be out by the end of summer, though I'm surprisingly busy. The story will be out eventually, so that might something to look forward too.

Wow, I still can't believe I was nominated…

Love you all!

~Emmy


	42. AN: The end

So…it's been awhile. You know how a few months ago I said there would be both and epilogue and a sequel? I'm very sorry to those that have been waiting for those (which is doubt anyone has been, but ya know, in case there was one or two) but I simply don't have the time or inspiration. To think that I used to believe school would get easier! Ha!

Again, my sincerest apologies. If you enjoy my writing enough to click a few places, I started a fictionpress account that I've been updating 10x more than I have been this one. They're all extremely short stories or poems. I have one story about how to get and keep a girlfriend (because boys really do need some help in areas such as that, though I in no way consider myself an expert). The link for my fictionpress profile is on this profile.

And that's really all I'm here to say. Hope you all had a happy holiday season and let's hope 2010 is a little less chaotic than 2009, eh?

~Emmy


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